hi. i need help decoding the behavior of a guy from church. he's really nice so i feel bad for even asking this, like i'm accusing him of being a creep. i like to think he's just genuinely nice and all, but i just can't shake off this....feeling, yknow.
recently, i joined an activity group at church. everyone's been polite but no one really chats with me since the age gap is too big (i'm in my 20's while everyone is ~40+) and there's a slight language barrier - we are all of the same ethnic group but i'm more comfortable with english. i don't have a major problem with my ethnic language though, so it's ok for the most part.
however, there's this one man (probably in his 40's) who's taken the time sit & converse with me, try to get to know me, eat with me, make me feel welcome, etc. he drives the church bus so he said he can drive me if i ever need rides on sundays. he said even for weekday morning prayer services, he can pick me up to drive me to church at 5am if i call him (yet strangely, his name is not listed for the driving schedule for 5am morning services. odd).
he gave me his # to call for any help or questions - something no one has offered to me. he takes care of me because basically, he knows it's a bit awkward for me and i don't have friends there. so i'm grateful to him. if i'm ever absent, he always wants to know why i wasn't there, etc. yes, this is a church so it's seems normal, but to me, it's a little new since no one else has been this concerned for me here. this is a big church and the people here are quite individualistic. they won't get too concerned about you unless you're really close with them. i've known this guy for only 2 months or so, and i only go to church on sundays, so we don't know each other that well. yet he's made me feel comfortable with him for the most part and i'm not as lonely since i can seek him out. he's also told me he used to see me on sundays before i was a part of the activity group, and always thought to himself that i'd become something big in church.
he also tells me i'm beautiful every now and then and tells me i brighten up the atmosphere. he's even asked others "isn't she so pretty?" i mean, other older men, all married, have told me i'm pretty too (sorry, i'm not saying this to be arrogant or anything, but it's necessary to mention this here), but with the purpose of introducing me to their single sons, lol. so i knew what their intent was. i'm pretty sure this man is single....
he's also been trying to get me to teach the youth group at my church, and has asked others to pray for me to get more involved. i asked why he doesn't teach and he mentioned a busy volunteering schedule. then he asked if we should then try it out together.
i chalked all this up to him being a sweet, religious guy really into helping people. i think he likes being involved in church but he doesn't seem THAT social to me.
however, it was my aunt who made me have this doubt about his behavior. she attends my church too, and when i told her of this nice man, she seemed to find him a little shady. however, she then retracted her statement and said he's just probably a good, helpful man who thinks of me as a daughter-figure or just a naive girl who needs help or smth. she still warned me to be a bit careful but i made light of the situation saying, "c'monnn, this is a church."
i can't imagine him trying to get with me in this super conservative church....yet why do i have this weird feeling? please tell me what this seems like to you. sure, this is a church setting and it's natural for others to be nice, but i never met anyone who was so interested in helping me in church and being overly nice. neither can we be labeled as 'friends' because as strange as this may sound, in my culture, if the age gap is like 20+, this cannot be labeled as a friendship. he's just an elderly figure and i'm like a child.
he's a great guy who's been very warm. i feel like such a douchebag for having these thoughts. guess i'm just not used to this type of treatment there....
sorry for the length. thanks in advance!