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how often do guys lie about being sterile?


Shorty389

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my ex claims that doctors told him hes sterile and cant have kids. he was my first and the only one ive been with. the reason im wondering if he is lying about it or not is because the first time we had sex the condom broke (im not yet on the pill so another reason besides std's and all of that why we used a condom), anyway, my period was a little late and i was experiencing some symptoms of pregnancy, luckily it turned out i wasnt. but when i told him my period was late he said i was "scaring" him and getting him a little "nervous", after a while i realized why would he be "nervous" if he was told he cant have kids? hes asked me once if i wanted to have sex without the condom but i told him no bc of not being on the pill and std whatnot. also told him id never have sex without a condom. anyway, we hooked up again last night (thinking he changed but surprise surprise he didnt) anyway, to the females- has any guy ever lied to you about being sterile and you ended up pregnant? i just thought that was a little weird why he was "nervous" that there was a small chance i could be pregnant when he claims he cant have kids...

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Depending on when he was diagnosed - he doesn't have to be lying to believe he can't have kids.

 

My husband had cancer treatments at an early age and was told he'd be incapable of fathering children. His son is now 8 years old. Doctors can be mistaken - it's always wise to err on the side of caution!

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I can definitely see it happening. For the men out there who don't want children, I'm sure they feel pressured to say "yes" to them in the future so a good way out of that would be to say that they are sterile and can't have them. That's much easier than saying "No I don't WANT them".

 

I'm infertile and on BC (for other reasons, EXTRA assurance) but if I wasn't infertile, I'm not sure...I could see myself writing on dating profiles that I'm "infertile" so that no one could tell me that I'd change my mind.

 

That's really the only main reason I can fathom. Some may argue that he's saying that to just have sex without a condom but that would be REALLY stupid on his part because he'd probably get the woman pregnant.

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Ohhhh! You didn't fall for it did you? The old "I'm sterile" line is the oldest trick in the book, maybe with the exception of the line "I'm on the pill". Not to say he's lying because he may be an honest decent guy but unless you have some concrete proof that he is sterile, choose to take it with a pinch of salt. Also, how exactly did he find out from his doctor that he was sterile?? That's not the kind of thing you find out in a check-up. The only way he would know would be if he and an ex partner had been trying for a kid and he'd had some tests done or perhaps if he'd had some kind of serious illness...something like that.

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yeah, ive asked him and he just says im sterile. no explanation, stupidly i fell for it im not pregnant- well not now luckily it was the last day of my period so it does limit my chances but i know it can still happen. i just found it weird that he was nervous when i thought i was possibly pregnant the first time when the condom broke since he claimed he couldnt have kids to begin with. luckily i wasnt. but i fell for the "ive changed give me another chance" blah blah turns out he just wanted the sex and i stupidly gave it to him but ive told him its not happening again so dont bother contacting me, learned my lesson thats for sure

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Some guys WANT to believe this. My uncle worked in a certain field in the military and was told waaayyy back then he would never have kids due to what he was working around. He has a 8 year old son now but the docs LEGIT told him he could not have kids.. a friend's ex assumed because he didn't knock his first wife up that he was sterile (never went to the doctor and confirmed this or what) and needless to say, they have a little girl now.

 

I would think twice about sleeping with a man who got nervous when he was suppose to be sterile.

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yeah, ive asked him and he just says im sterile. no explanation

 

Don't beat yourself up over it

 

Most guys don't pull the 'I'm sterile' card without some form of explination but if another one ever does, take it as a huge red flag. No! in fact, take it as a downright lie! Demand to know how he knows he's sterile. If he doesn't come up with an answer, chances are he's not.

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Don't beat yourself up over it

 

Most guys don't pull the 'I'm sterile' card without some form of explination but if another one ever does, take it as a huge red flag. No! in fact, take it as a downright lie! Demand to know how he knows he's sterile. If he doesn't come up with an answer, chances are he's not.

 

yeah, after him im def. going to be more cautious about things like that...thanks

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I think you're overthinking this. Medical advice is never 100% certain. Guys who have been told that they're sterile by their doctors have still had kids, for example. There's always the chance that they are mistaken. So if you told him that you were late, etc, that would still be "scary" for that reason.

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I think you're overthinking this. Medical advice is never 100% certain. Guys who have been told that they're sterile by their doctors have still had kids, for example. There's always the chance that they are mistaken. So if you told him that you were late, etc, that would still be "scary" for that reason.

 

that's true i didn't think of that...thanks

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Um, I shouldn't imagine they'd lie about it often, what kind of guy would wanna go around spreading rumours about himself that he's a big wuffter?

 

I'd be ashamed of myself if I was sterile and certainly wouldn't tell people I was, so I certainly wouldn't bloody lie about it!

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Um, I shouldn't imagine they'd lie about it often, what kind of guy would wanna go around spreading rumours about himself that he's a big wuffter?

 

I'd be ashamed of myself if I was sterile and certainly wouldn't tell people I was, so I certainly wouldn't bloody lie about it!

 

Like I said, maybe he doesn't want kids and he's saying that to her so she won't pressure him.

 

I'm infertile (for real) and definitely don't feel ashamed.

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Um, I shouldn't imagine they'd lie about it often, what kind of guy would wanna go around spreading rumours about himself that he's a big wuffter?

 

I'd be ashamed of myself if I was sterile and certainly wouldn't tell people I was, so I certainly wouldn't bloody lie about it!

 

If he was lying he was most likely doing it to try and get out of having to use a condom! The OP's already said he asked not to use one (which considering she was a new partner makes no sense whatsoever). Oh and btw, it happens plenty. Normal intelligent decent men are less likely to pull this sort of behaviour but let's face it, there are plenty of worthless ****s out there. You only need to watch an episode of Jeremy Kyle or Maury Povich to see how many of them are walking amongst us, breeding like rats and bringing down the gene pool. Sad but true.

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For the most part, guys are terrified of an accidental pregnancy and the years of child support that follows. I've never known a guy to lie about being sterile, or about birth control, but when I was in college, it was quite common for women to lie to their boyfriends in order to trap them into marriage.

 

That's not to say it never happens. I can easily imagine that a guy might lie to get out of wearing a condom, or in order to have sex when no birth control was available. For the most part, I think a guy would only do this if a) he's a complete sociopath or moron, b) it's a one-night stand and he thinks there's no chance that the woman could track him down if she got pregnant, or c) he's trying to trap her into marriage. But as I said, I never actually met anyone it happened to.

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Yeah it seems like a REAL bone-headed thing to do, have sex with a woman without protections when you KNOW that you're not infertile. Unless you like the idea of unwanted children and paying child support for 18 years, I really have no idea why people do this. It seems like the men are shooting themselves in the foot. Unless they are trapping the person into marriage or something.

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