Ask For Advice
Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: How do you "break up" with someone you've been dating unofficially?

  1. #1
    greenstar
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    14

    How do you "break up" with someone you've been dating unofficially?

    We've been going out for almost a month now. He's reallly good to me, treats me like a princess, but I am not that particularly attracted to him. A month ago, I was burned pretty badly by this one guy I had been seeing for three months.... I don't know if I should continue dating the new guy and hope that my attraction will grow or should I just break up with him? If so, how would I go about doing that without hurting him too badly or burning any bridges? Also, the new guy and I only messed around for a bit...we did not have sex or anything near that.

  2. #2
    RitaTrue
    Platinum Member RitaTrue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    A Pineapple Under The Sea
    Posts
    1,815
    Gender
    Female
    If you've been dating unofficially, then you can "break up" unofficially. Just fade off into the distance, and dont look back. It needs no explanation. Especially if he burned you like that.

    Onward and upward.

  3. #3
    jaysmaury
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Age
    30
    Posts
    149
    Gender
    Male
    I agree with Rita... Just slowly scale back the amount of contact you have with him until he doesn't even notice anymore. Of course, this depends on how far it went when you say "only messed around for a bit."

  4. #4
    greenstar
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    14
    well we only made out and got a little touchy feely, that's all. This guy has never burned me. The last guy that I dated briefly for three months did.

  5. #5
    RitaTrue
    Platinum Member RitaTrue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    A Pineapple Under The Sea
    Posts
    1,815
    Gender
    Female
    OP, something just dawned on me, when you're unofficially dating someone, how much do you expect exclusivity? On your end, on their end?

  6. #6
    jaimecat
    Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    16
    I say continue dating him, maybe see him less, but pursue others on the side. If you really are unofficial you should have no problems doing that but be honest if he asks you about seeing other men. I say this because I dont feel a month is a long time. You shouldnt give up yet- he could grow on you.

    I feel its a double standard in our society. Often I see men posting similar threads on here, except adding "I am interested in someone else possibly" and people respond by saying date both unofficially. Why cant a woman do the same thing? Dont put all your eggs in one basket.

  7. 09-21-2011, 05:17 PM

  8. #7
    Ms Darcy
    Platinum Member Ms Darcy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    United States
    Age
    35
    Posts
    29,548
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    3869
    Quote Originally Posted by ferson [Register to see the link]
    just be honest and tell him when he calls to ask you out again that you don't know, you just aren't feeling it even though he's a great guy and good luck.
    I agree. I think the fade isn't nice.

  9. #8
    ut804
    Gold Member ut804's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    NYC
    Age
    30
    Posts
    1,417
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    1
    Quote Originally Posted by jaysmaury [Register to see the link]
    I agree with Rita... Just slowly scale back the amount of contact you have with him until he doesn't even notice anymore. Of course, this depends on how far it went when you say "only messed around for a bit."
    no no I don't like this. If he truly likes her he IS going to notice, and he's going to analyze everything and wait for her calls, etc. ALWAYS make a clean break. Don't play mind games. Don't drag anything out. I hate the "fade out" method. Its not fair to keep the other person guessing and wondering. Be honest and say "hey I think you're great but I dont think we click" or soemthing.

  10.  

Top Threads
Chronically late girlfriend
Well, where to start... sorry this is a bit of a long post, but hopefully it's quite interesting or entertaining!... My girlfriend is chronically
Devastated after being ghosted
I've been dating a guy for about 4 months now. I should add I made sure to move things slowly at first and not rush into anything. We got along so
The back n forth guy. Please help!
I have a dilemma that is driving me crazy. I really need some advice badly! Feel like im goin mad as i dont know what to do! Ill try and keep it
He wants me to chase him !
Hello all, I have posted about a man I have been interested in and here is another one. : ) Seems very shy and we have gone back and forth
Complicated older guy....
So I met this guy a few years ago. At the time he was married and so was I but I can admit I thought he was a attractive guy. Fast forward a few
Idk what I see in these men?
So I fell for a guy who was not at same place in life as me. I ignored my instincts of what he lacked (age, maturity level etc) and fell for the
I Could Really Use Some Direction
I'm really at a loss with my dating life. As some context, I'm in my mid-twenties. I have a fantastic career, I work out daily, I have fantastic
Featured Threads
Parent and relationships problems
So clearly i need help sooo i will get right into the story.....sorry its so long I am a 25 year old male who is in a relationship with my 19
My boyfriend is trying to date other woman on online dating site.
I really need help. I am so confused. My boyfriend is on online dating site. He said he wants to date other women. We were on and off relationship
My wife left me without having even a talk
Hi everybody, I wonder if this is normal just to leave a marriage of 7 years without having a proper talk before moving on? It happened to me that
Confused about FWB
Last weekend my FWB and I made plans to meet up. He drove down from his place to go to a party with friends, afterwards he was coming to spend the
Everything is just JUMBLED
I have an extremely, EXTREMELY screwed up life. At least from my point of view it is. At least I think I'm the only one that knows my own
Getting over someone to be with them again later?
Long story short, my ex broke up with me after 4 years because he said he was immature and needed to grow up without me and part of that was meeting
Need Advice - it's urgent for me
Hello Everyone, I meesed up my life and I take full responsibilty. I ned advice and what to do to remedy the situation immediately and prevent it
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •