Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 23

Thread: Looking to have our first threesome-need advice on finding 3rd party and how to

  1. #1
    Miss Kitty
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Age
    27
    Posts
    410
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    2

    Lightbulb Looking to have our first threesome-need advice on finding 3rd party and how to

    My boyfriend and I were recently discussing our fetishes and fantasies and I came out to him that I am bisexual and he came out that he's always wanted to have a mff threesome. I have never had one and wasn't even sure how to do it (positioning etc.). I've looked it up online and found some positions I like and some great advice such as setting boundaries ahead of time ( my rules are, pay more attention to me than her and no penetration with her). The main issue is how to find another person. We met a girl at a video game store that we both think is pretty cute, so we are going to try to get to know her and hope for the best. Another possibility is a mutual friend of ours. She's bisexual and I've had a crush on her for a while. Austin (my bf) thinks she's beautiful as well. She's always asking me about my sex life with Austin and suggesting things for he and I to do. She's very kinky. I told her we were going to try to have a threesome and she asked me to tell her how it goes when we find the right girl. I'd like to ask her, but she's a co-worker. In fact, I am a cashier, my bf works on the lot there, and she's a head cashier. That would make it so wonderfully kinky if things go right, but could definitely be an issue if things go wrong. However, since she is a good friend, I trust her more than I would someone we don't know as well (important especially for things like stds) and she has a very serious boyfriend that she is very much in love with so I'm really worried about her trying to take mine since she's happy with the one she has.

    I should also add that I know threesomes can lead to jealousy and awkwardness, etc. However, we are in a point in our relationship when we are very much in love and I believe that we are ready and that this could be a positive thing for our relationship as we explore our sexual side.

    So,
    1. How do we find the right one?
    2. How do we ask when we find one we like?
    3. Any additional advice about threesomes (other than "don't do it" and "you're boyfriend is a pervert for wanting two women")?

  2. #2
    Oneironaut
    Platinum Member Oneironaut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    The beautiful Oregon coast
    Posts
    1,129
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    3
    You might try link removed. You'll have to sign up, but I've had an account there for almost 2 years and have had no issues at all in terms of viruses or spam.

    If you live in or near a bigger city, that site can point the way to finding groups and clubs of like-minded people.

    Good luck.

  3. #3
    Miss Kitty
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Age
    27
    Posts
    410
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by Oneironaut [Register to see the link]
    You might try link removed. You'll have to sign up, but I've had an account there for almost 2 years and have had no issues at all in terms of viruses or spam.

    If you live in or near a bigger city, that site can point the way to finding groups and clubs of like-minded people.

    Good luck.
    Thank you. Does the fet stand for fetish? If we have another fetish as well, could we find a threesome partner who's into that as well? Also, how do you know if the people on these sites have STDs or not. I am really worried about that. I am way too young to end up with HIV and never able to have sex again. I have an extreme fear of STDs.

    I'll check it out though.

  4. #4
    Oneironaut
    Platinum Member Oneironaut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    The beautiful Oregon coast
    Posts
    1,129
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    3
    Yes, the fet does stand for fetish. My boyfriend and I have them, too...lots of them.

    As for STDs, I would recommend getting to know someone first, as with any sexual situation. And that's where a club or group may help. Some even go as far as to have their members tested for STDs, so they can "play" safely.

    Good luck, I hope it helps.

  5. #5
    Miss Kitty
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Age
    27
    Posts
    410
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    2
    I went to the site, but it was asking me a lot about S and M type stuff. Is it only for that, because my bf and I aren't really into that. Are there any other sites like that where you don't have to be into bondage? Thank you!

  6. #6
    Miss Kitty
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Age
    27
    Posts
    410
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by Oneironaut [Register to see the link]
    Yes, the fet does stand for fetish. My boyfriend and I have them, too...lots of them.

    As for STDs, I would recommend getting to know someone first, as with any sexual situation. And that's where a club or group may help. Some even go as far as to have their members tested for STDs, so they can "play" safely.

    Good luck, I hope it helps.
    Oh I like the idea of ones that test. How do you find them?

    I am recently opening up to my fetishes and I agree, they are SO much fun. Austin is helping me to embrace my kinky side. I have recently discovered that I am a furry, I like hetai, I have a foot/shoe fetish and am for the first time opening up to the idea of a threesome. I look forward to exploring more fetishes and fantasies and seeing what else I like.

  7. #7
    BellaDonna
    Platinum Member BellaDonna's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    9,139
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    16
    Another possibility is a mutual friend of ours. She's bisexual and I've had a crush on her for a while. Austin (my bf) thinks she's beautiful as well. She's always asking me about my sex life with Austin and suggesting things for he and I to do. She's very kinky. I told her we were going to try to have a threesome and she asked me to tell her how it goes when we find the right girl. I'd like to ask her, but she's a co-worker. In fact, I am a cashier, my bf works on the lot there, and she's a head cashier.
    Bad idea to involve a co-worker in your private sexual fantasies at home, IMO.

  8. #8
    Miss Kitty
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Age
    27
    Posts
    410
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by BellaDonna [Register to see the link]
    Bad idea to involve a co-worker in your private sexual fantasies at home, IMO.
    I do worry about that part. That's the real pain in the arse of it all is that otherwise she's the perfect one. Also, what does IMO stand for?

  9. #9
    BellaDonna
    Platinum Member BellaDonna's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    9,139
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    16
    Sorry, IMO= In My Opinion.

    Some compartments of life should be kept separate I think. You may want to keep sex and work separate, although it seems she already knows too much.

  10. #10
    annie24
    Super Moderator annie24's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Age
    36
    Posts
    45,858
    Thanked
    1036
    link removed

    If you don't already read savage love, you should start! Dan Savage is a great sex advice columnist, he has TONS of articles on this topic.

    And I agree that getting your coworker involved can get dicey. depends on your jobs though - if you are a cashier at a fast food place, and don't mind getting new jobs if things go horribly wrong, then go for it.

    I think that ground rules are very very important.

  11.  

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Top Threads
Sex drive men vs women?
I was talking to some friends the other day and the topic of men's and women's sex drive came up. One often gets the impression, not least in the
41 year old male lover not interested in sex?
He is very insecure in bed and has low self esteem. I'm very sexual and it upsets him? What's going on?
Straight Guy in Gay Relationship
Hey everyone, if anyone could help it would be greatly appreciated. I've been in a relationship with a man for the past 3 years. We started out as
Why wait until i turn 18 to have sex??
I know that it might sound dumb to ask a question like that but hear me out. So, right now i'm 16 and my boyfriend is 17 and we've been together for
Sex is always excruciating
I'm 16 years old and I know that's very young to be having sex but I feel that I'm ready for it. To begin with the pain isn't caused by poor
question about libido
Basically I wanted to get my anxiety under control and the psychiatrist recommended a weak medication, however i've noticed my libido is close to
Featured Threads
Parent and relationships problems
So clearly i need help sooo i will get right into the story.....sorry its so long I am a 25 year old male who is in a relationship with my 19
My boyfriend is trying to date other woman on online dating site.
I really need help. I am so confused. My boyfriend is on online dating site. He said he wants to date other women. We were on and off relationship
My wife left me without having even a talk
Hi everybody, I wonder if this is normal just to leave a marriage of 7 years without having a proper talk before moving on? It happened to me that
Confused about FWB
Last weekend my FWB and I made plans to meet up. He drove down from his place to go to a party with friends, afterwards he was coming to spend the
Everything is just JUMBLED
I have an extremely, EXTREMELY screwed up life. At least from my point of view it is. At least I think I'm the only one that knows my own
Getting over someone to be with them again later?
Long story short, my ex broke up with me after 4 years because he said he was immature and needed to grow up without me and part of that was meeting
Need Advice - it's urgent for me
Hello Everyone, I meesed up my life and I take full responsibilty. I ned advice and what to do to remedy the situation immediately and prevent it
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •