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Thread: Is it normal to push one's closest loved one away while grieving?

  1. #131
    Platinum Member RainyCoast's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Originally Posted by Marisof
    Thanks! im new to this. Not even sure how does it works
    just open the subforum (for example healing after breakup and divorce) and click "post new thread", then type away. it can take a while to appear on the main page, so have a nice cup of coffee ready while you're waiting. welcome to ena

  2. #132

    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    USA, New York
    It's so hard to accept seeing as there was no fault in the relationship to blame.
    You just have to move on and maybe you'll get your answer one day.
    Maybe you won't.

  3. #133
    Thank you for all of the people who have shared their experience here.

    A lot of you made me understand that this way of reacting is there for people.
    Made me understand her point of view a lot more. As personally I haven't had to have that experience beforehand.

    My story currently. Me (26M) her (23F).

    I was on a dating app and found this girl that in my initial opinion would never want to go out with me. We ended up talking constantly for 2 weeks via text as I was ill and she seemed amazing and real interest in me as well. Then after our first date, we had quite a few more and we're in a relationship soon after knowing her for a month. 2 weeks later with all of this Corona situation I invited her to stay with me for the duration if she would like and she agreed. Which meant we were spending all of our days together sharing similar interests making jokes and playing games together she really seemed to like and care for me a lot that made me feel more for her as I thought she is amazing.

    3 Weeks into us quarantining together her dad dies in a different country. Her dad was the closest person to her and only really close family she has. Considering how she always talked about her dad I really felt for her and wanted to be there for her and support in any way I could. She left my place and spent time with the family she still has. After that staying at her friends family that she was staying anyway. A week after the death she breaks up with me, but still wants to be friends. So I comply as I care for her deeply, we talk for hours on the phone after she does break up with me. But is adamant that we are through.
    She insists on going through all of this alone in her own pace and she just doesn't want to string me along, because she doesn't know when she is going to be okay or fine with all of this.
    So with her gone from my place and me being there all alone, I flew back home to my family as being alone at that time was getting too much.
    2 weeks after the break up I decide I can't just keep friends right now as I care for her so deeply and perhaps some space will give her a different outlook.
    I am not sure if it does, but I promised I won't talk to her until I return back to the city where she is, which might be a month or two down the line.
    I said to her it was the best relationship I ever had and she agreed that it was her best relationship as well.

    I get how people can react this way and how she thinks she is looking out for me. Doesn't make the process any easier. It's the only girl I literally saw having a future and family together.
    I hope that this place gathers only the sad stories and that there are enough happy endings out there.
    If it works out for me and we actually get back together, I'll update this thread.

    Hopefully, this helps whoever is going through the same thing.
    The situation doesn't make sense and people are affected in a different way.
    After all, I want her to be happy if she finds it easier to find on her own. I'll do my best to respect that decision.

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