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Thread: He is ignoring me ?! Is it over or does he need space ?

  1. #1
    jessica1987
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    He is ignoring me ?! Is it over or does he need space ?

    I've been dating him for 3 months. I am 24 years old my boyfriend is 26. My boyfriend last spoke to me on june 7 at night, we got into an argument. The argument was over his time, he told me doesnt have time and wasnt responding to my texts but would write on his friends wall on facebook. I was fine after he explained but he got a bit angry and said that i always argue with him. so he said its done, he doesnt want a relationship not with me, with no one! Then I told him that what he was doing was unfair and i didnt deserve this. So, after a couple of minutes he told me, how about you just chill and i will do the same, think about the relationship, see if this is what you want and i will do the same. We are still together we are not broken up, just taking some time to think. We will give wednesday a break, and meet thursday to talk about our relationship.sweet dreams goodnight and that was it.
    Thursday
    came around he didn't text me or call me, so I texted him, whats the plan? Are we still meeting up? NO ANSWER so i called him a couple of more times no answer- so i finally texted him I guess you werent ready to meet today or were just tired and fell asleep please call me or text me in the morning, so i know your okay, sweet dreams goodnight. The next morning he didnt reply NOTHING ! I was a bit shocked and worried. Then I realized he was okay and just ignoring me, so
    Friday
    I texted him, ok i think you need more space, i will let you call me when your ready, because i think i texted and called you more then enough. I care for please dont stress over this i know you already have a lot going on,dont worry i got your back. I will be here and I know you will talk to me when your ready. I left it at that
    Saturday - no contact, and he didnt contact me at all !
    Sunday- I texted him saying" I know you are and will be busy, but i think we can both work this out if we want too, You just have to be clear with me and i will be clear too, I dont want to give up just because one of us got a bit busy. If u want to work this out let me know now because you left a bit unclear ? NO ANSWER i texted him again, i have feelings too, i worry too, i have a heart too, helllo ? NO ANSWER i didnt contact him until around 10 pm I called him around 4 times, left him a message saying, Hi, i dont know if your okay or not, I hope your okay, if your done with this relationship or need space, you need to let me know you dont even have to call me just text me.
    Monday-
    I saw his car was parked so i went up to his door to confront him, no answer, i texted him, i'm outside your door, he did not open his door, but when i called his phone was off, i still called about 5 times and then i just gave up
    Tuesday- No contact from me, and nothing from him
    Wednesday- No contact from me, and nothing from him
    and today No contact from me, and nothing from him
    So after Monday, I decided to stop contacting him, enough was enough. If he really cared about me he will come around!
    I just dont understand why he left without saying anything or tricking me. He told me we are not broken up but we did not meet on thursday. He wont even text me back or call me back to let me know if hes done, or just needs space ! I have not contacted him since tuesday and i was hoping that would give me my answer but he still has made no effort to talk. Do you think hes done and is just going to ignore me until I stop because he doesnt want to deal with break up drama, or is he wanting space because he is confused and he'll come around when hes ready?

  2. #2
    DylanNotorious
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    Your boyfriend is frustrated at how needy you are. This started over an argument over "his time."

    He's ignoring you for a reason. It's because you just don't get it. Sorry if that's harsh, but your constant texting/calling is probably the main reason he feels smothered.

  3. #3
    jessica1987
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    our argument also started from me complaining to him that if he is telling me doesnt have time to text me or call me because he is busy at work but is sitting there writing back to or commenting on his female friends facebookwalll using words like pumpkin and angel. He told me that those are just words, they mean nothing, but to me that is flirting. Why can't he just be open about what he wants. I havent contacted him in 5 days and dont plan on contacting him so hopefully this way will help.

  4. #4
    Melting
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    I think you need to let go (sorry) and move on.

    He would have contacted you by now, if he was interested in talking.

  5. #5
    DylanNotorious
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    Also you seem to always sweep things under the carpet when he hasn't returned any of your messages/texts. Why do you do that? Here is an example of this behaviour.

    Thursday
    came around he didn't text me or call me, so I texted him, whats the plan? Are we still meeting up? NO ANSWER so i called him a couple of more times no answer- so i finally texted him I guess you werent ready to meet today or were just tired and fell asleep please call me or text me in the morning, so i know your okay, sweet dreams goodnight. The next morning he didnt reply NOTHING ! I was a bit shocked and worried. Then I realized he was okay and just ignoring me, so
    Friday
    I texted him, ok i think you need more space, i will let you call me when your ready, because i think i texted and called you more then enough. I care for please dont stress over this i know you already have a lot going on,dont worry i got your back. I will be here and I know you will talk to me when your ready.


    I know you don't want to fight with him, but you can't just keep turning the other way when he's ignoring you. You arn't getting angry so he knows he can just keep ignoring you.

    I think you should just ignore him, and let him know how that feels. But at the same time if you guys do get back together you need to lay off the constant texting/calling/not getting angry.

  6. #6
    jessica1987
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    When we were together, I would text him once maybe or would wait for him to call. When I saw that he was ignoring me I got pissed off and delt that he could have at least texted okay thanks or something !! and I think thats when I started going way overboard with calling him and texting him. I have stopped and I will not contact him ever again. He has my number or he knows where to find me. He always told me when I want to break up i will tell you im not scared of you! haha its funny because he did the exact opposite of what he said before. Even couple of days before this argument I told him if you are not interested in me its better we break up. He texted me back saying No its not that, I swear I'm busy at work.

  7. #7
    Melting
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    It is really hard when you want to contact someone and they don't respond and the more they don't repsond the worse it gets, it makes our minds go into overdrive. This is where you need to control yourself and try your best to focus on something else.

    I realise that it is alot easier said then done! Been there many times myself...

  8. #8
    Stay_home
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    I admire the fact that you want to fight for this relationship, but you're being really pushy about it. Calling numerous times, showing up at the door - those things are going to build an even higher wall between you two.

  9. #9
    banal
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    One thing is though, in the OP's defense, she began to get aggressive because he was ignoring her at the expense of flirting with other women. I think that the problem isn't the OP's neediness; it's that the dude just doesn't want to be in a steady relationship. But I'm not there, so I don't really know.

  10. #10
    metrogirl
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    Even after you told him you weren't going to text him, you still continued to text him constantly. He's not responding because he doesn't want to and his willingness to continue to ignore you speaks volumes. I know it's hard for you to let this go, but you can't force someone to be in a relationship with you if they don't want to.

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