Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14

Thread: My boyfriend is going to lunch with another girl.

  1. #1
    supersprode

    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    2

    Question My boyfriend is going to lunch with another girl.

    My boyfriend told me about meeting this girl a few weeks ago during his graduation ceremony. He told me she had been in a few of his classes but he never really talked to her. The next day he told me that he emailed her and she responded.

    Yesterday, my boyfriend told me he had a confession. He told me that he had agreed to go to lunch with her today. I've been feeling weird about him meeting her ever since he told me. I feel like he's leaving out details or something and his behavior has changed. We have been in a LDR as of a few weeks ago, right after his graduation. Usually, we text/IM all day, an occasional call during the day, and then he calls me at night and we talk until we fall asleep. All of that has stopped.

    I'm also concerned because my boyfriend has been flirty with other women in the past and I highly doubt he's given up his old ways.

    Please give me your opinions on this situation.

  2. #2
    DN

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    42,515
    Thanked
    5
    If he uses the word 'confession' then it seems more likely something is going that should not be.

  3. #3
    Ronke12
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    38
    Gender
    Female
    Yea...the fact that he called it a 'confession' is NOT good. That doesnt imply lunch with just a friend.

  4. #4
    Gerda
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    277
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    1
    I have to say, after reading so many stories about people who actually full-out cheat and then lie repeatedly I find his forthcoming-ness refreshing. It does sound like a potentially bad situation, but I think it's great that he has told you about it. Have you specifically asked him, "Is there something going on between you two? Is this a romantic thing?"

  5. #5
    Deejmonster
    Platinum Member Deejmonster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Southern New Jersey
    Posts
    1,101
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    I don't think that he is cheating.. he is being honest.. but when someone is honest about meeting another person... that usually means that he is trying to tell you that he is lining up another relationship. My best friend is a girl.. and i never have to hide anything from my current girlfriend. I thought that this is what he was doing at first in your post.. but the fact that you are no longer in visible contact with him might mean that he is looking for a way out. It might be because he needs affection that he cant get from an LDR.. or the fact that he feels that she can offer something else. Whatever excuse is completely immature and wrong. I would find a way to see him personally. That would be the only way to really talk to him. Ask him what is going on, you deserve the truth. If you text/call/IM there is always a way for him to dodge you. If you are in person.. not so easy. What I am taking from this though is that he is looking for a way out, but is trying not to cheat on you, because that would weigh on his conscience, he probably thinks that this is more "moral" by telling you everything that is going on.. but it is still wrong. Don't accuse him of anything just yet, they might be just platonic friends.. it can happen! but i would seriously suggest talking to him very soon about this.

  6. #6
    adonis_boy
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    136
    Gender
    Male
    Do you have a chance to visit him or see him face to face? He might be getting things from this girl that he can't get out of a LDR and this might be a potential end for your relationship. If you have that chance, pay him a visit and make him remember good old times you had. You have to keep these memories and excitement alive and it is only possible by being with him physically. Maybe if you could visit him for a few days, his butterflies might return and he might realize that what he has already established with you is far more strong than what he could have with a new girl he met for lunch.

  7. #7
    supersprode

    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    2
    Thanks for your input guys.

    In addition to the "i have a confession" thing he also asked me not to get mad.. so maybe it is something more than he says. I've asked him over and over if he's attracted to her and why he wants to meet with her and all he says is "she's my friend, i feel no attraction." Honestly, all my concerns are stemming from a similar situation that has happened between us not too long ago. The only difference is that he met the girl online and seriously considered giving her a chance and "playing the field." He even told all his friends and some of his family about her and he tried to meet up with her. He was actually attracted to this girl but he lied about not being attracted to her.

    I do appreciate his unusual forthcoming-ness, though, especially considering past incidents . I do think that the distance is dulling his feelings for me. He's supposed to come spend the day with me next Friday so hopefully that will remind him of just how awesome he thinks I am.

  8. #8
    Miss Firecracker
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    8,525
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    31
    Time to get a new boyfriend, or boyfriends.

    The writing is on the wall.

    If you want to date him, then make sure you leave all your options open. He sure has.

  9. #9
    Fudgie
    Forum Supporter
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    14,467
    Thanked
    1652
    There's nothing wrong with a guy having female friends but his words indicate that he's being shady about it.

  10. #10
    BriarRose
    Platinum Member BriarRose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    7,570
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    3
    He has met someone that has peaked his interest and is letting you know that, since you are long distance. He is being honest, and basically leaving the door open for you to go out with someone else, too. My NUMBER ONE rule in dating now, is no LDR. They may work for some, but I will never do one again.

  11.  

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Top Threads
Picture/video taking of girls in public.. Does he even want me anymore?
So ill try to cut this story short as poss.. Me and my partner have been together for nearly 8 years. Hes 30 and im 22. 3 years into our relationship
Love my GF but having attraction isssues
Ok here's the deal. This is a tough topic, hence why I've come on here. I am putting trust into this community by even talking about this, but based
I snooped through my bf's fb and of course I found something I shouldn't have
Let me first say, I know I'm in the wrong here and it's my fault I'm in the position I'm in now. When I opened fb last night, it was on my bf's
Relationship Help - Should I stay or should I go?
I am 25 years old. I have been dating my boyfriend for about 2 years now and this is my first real relationship. Our relationship has had its ups and
Can't control jealous about my boyfriend.
Hi guys. Me and my boyfriend are dating for almost 2 years. We've been in a long distance relationship, which is already hard. But we can take it
My boyfriend is now the "alpha male" after dad died
So my boyfriend (21) lives with his mom, brother (17) and half brother (10). His step dad, who was the father of his 10 year old brother, had
The Wierdest thing just happened
Been dating girlfirend for a little over the year now. She is about 25 and I'm 30. we don't live together and we see each other about2 3 times a

Expert Advice
Featured Threads
I met guy at a bar - what next??? Please read it through!! Pls advise!!
So Iím 33 & happen to move the Chicago city very recently from NYC. The first weekend; Saturday I was bored & didnít feel like sitting at home on a
Are there any men out there that do not watch porn
Almost want to give up on trying to find what I think would be a good guy. I feel like this will be the one thread that nobody will respond to. I
Spouse's lack of ambition is frustrating
I recently got married. About eight months prior to our wedding my now husband was laid off from work. He decided not to look for work as wedding
Petty, petty arguments
Hello all!! My partner who I've been with for a few years is 7 years older than me yet his maturity level is not where mine is. This is not a
Blocked by crush. Will NC work?
Last month a guy I had being talking to for about 3 months blocked me. He said the excessive calling and texting was starting to he to much. Prior to
Child Support.. Pursue or Not Pursue?
I'm needing a little advice about how Child Support works. My Ex Fiance decided at 7 weeks he didn't want my child. I was told in no uncertain terms
Millennial-aged men: could you really date someone like me?
(I'm sorry if this is disjointed. It's hard even to type about.) Three years ago, I had been working as a prosecutor for two years. My boyfriend and
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •