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Thread: When do men miss their exes?

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    PrettyGood
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    Question When do men miss their exes?

    I'm talking about the dumper men. When do they miss their exes? And why? Give me some positive and negative examples.

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    nattpanter
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    I general people tend to cruise on a breakup-wave when they dump someone...then when that wave crash into land and it ain`t so fun no more their true feelings surface. Most ex`s do come back, if you leave them alone for some time... However in my experience I would say in general about men that they are more likely to fall into the catagory of "out of sight out of mind" compared to woman...

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    WildChild
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    Quote Originally Posted by nattpanter [Register to see the link]
    I general people tend to cruise on a breakup-wave when they dump someone...then when that wave crash into land and it ain`t so fun no more their true feelings surface. Most ex`s do come back, if you leave them alone for some time... However in my experience I would say in general about men that they are more likely to fall into the catagory of "out of sight out of mind" compared to woman...
    Out of sight out of mind means the less you see or hear from your ex girlfriend (the dumpee) the easier it is forget about her?

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    nattpanter
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    Yeah I believe it is so...if it ain`t a long-time relationship like 3+ years. Then I think it becomes alot more complicated for both parts. But the oh-Im-so-happy-alone part goes for everyone who breaks up...again in my experience. I once left the girl Im now "waiting" for...I had a real energy-boost just after and changed alot of things. Then when things went back to "normal" I missed her again and contacted her and we got back together.

    I think girls process things differently after breakup...They miss the feeling of having the man they love...as guys tend to miss the precence of the woman we love...it`s a theory at least. Let the woman express themselves perhaps

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    PrettyGood
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    Quote Originally Posted by nattpanter [Register to see the link]
    Then when things went back to "normal" I missed her again and contacted her and we got back together.
    And how long did it take for you to 'party out' all the happiness until you began missing her? Was it several weeks, several months or several years after? I'm just asking out of my curiosity

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    Stabilus
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    Years later when you have forgotten about the reasons you actually dumped them.

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    NCforME
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    There's really noway to tell. What your looking for from us is a time frame from us so you can start counting the days until he comes back. The truth is he might not and we certainly don't know when. Your best bet is to just work on being happy with out him and figure out what went wrong. That way if he does come back you can work on things with him or you'll be more prepared to be in a relationship with the next guy.

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    nattpanter
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    Quote Originally Posted by NewDilemma [Register to see the link]
    And how long did it take for you to 'party out' all the happiness until you began missing her? Was it several weeks, several months or several years after? I'm just asking out of my curiosity
    I broke up in early september and we had LC. I still loved her to death...then in january we stoped having contact (no agreement) and after a month I think or maybe 6 weeks. I felt rapidly more misserable until I finally understood why...I missed her in my life. My happiness-part of this period lasted perhaps for two months... Then it slowly went downwards... Just to add some confusion, the happiness-part wasn`t really a happy period...it was shallow in many ways, but I started working out and took real good care of my apperance and I still try doing that. I think that and the fact that I realised how deeply I love her was the best part. Well, now she is gone (after 2 years) and Im in her shoes

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    Heartbroken30
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    And how about if you begged/pleaded the day after break up then went NC for a month then tried to reconnect and asked once again if we can work it out and they said no. Since then I have been doing NC for 1 month and don't plan on contacting him again unless he does. Is there still a chance he might miss me later in the future? Or does he now hate me? He did say he is open to friendship as more time has passed. I'm just wondering because I know he is out doing the 'dating' and 'party' thing, how can he have time to even think about me. We were together for 1 1/2 years and broke up 3 months now.

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    PrettyGood
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    Heartbroken30, I know it's an old truth and you already know about it, but NC is the best thing. Because no matter WHEN you contact him AGAIN and later AGAIN you don't let him to miss you. IMO he needs a LONG time without you to miss you. So it won't help if you try to keep NC and then try to contact him again. The more you chase for him - the more he runs from you. Stop chasing and he will stop running. You CAN'T do anything to MAKE him return to you, but you CAN make him miss you more which leads to a wish to return to you. And it's a long time where YOU need to change. Not for him. For yourself. You need to refresh your clothing, hairstyle, your body care, maybe go to the gym, start doing things which could improve you physically and mentally. Start dating - don't rush all the things with new people. If you're in some dating site or any other social site - make your new photos where you are really happy being yourself (without him). Don't pretend, try for yourself. Because he may never return to the OLD YOU. And when he writes you - don't sound too enthusiastically or surprised that he wrote. Be yourself. Don't even start talking about the relationships or feelings. Don't EVER ask him if he wants to return or not. And if he suggest you to be friends - refuse, turn around and go back to your life without him. Maybe it will help him understand that you changed and MAYBE just MAYBE he will rethink his decision to re-conciliate. But it's a real long time of changing yourself. So 1 month is not enough just to write and ask him if he wants to return or not. That's why he said strict NO. But that's just my opinion, you know.

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