Toddlers in Restaurants

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How do you feel about this? Do children have any place in formal restaurants?

If they are old enough to behave themselves, then yes, I don't see a problem with it. It's the parents responsibility to know whether or not their children can be respectful of other diners.

I know I wouldn't want to spend a good deal of money on a nice meal just to have to listen to screaming children the whole time.

I agree with Sanesoul. I think a lot of outbursts can be avoided with common sense

1) Don't go out to a restaurant during your child's normal nap time without them having a nap earlier.

2) Don't drag a kid out at 9:30 pm for a late night dinner - sometimes infants do okay because they sleep but not a toddler. A lot of times toddlers have a melt down in the evening particular not having had a nap.

3) Don't subject the kid to adults-only events like a bachelorette party at a restaurant because you don't have a sitter.

Oftentimes, other diners are parents themselves who hired a babysitter so they could have a night out away from kids. So when you bring your kids to a restaurant and fail to control them, you're not just annoying childfreers, you're ruining the experience of other parents who planned their evening, as you should have done.

Having kids requires sacrifices, sorry - that means you don't get to go out on the fly anymore. Now it's more expensive and takes planning. Don't have a baby if this doesn't work for you.

I definitely wouldn't take a toddler or younger to a fine restaurant. The wait alone for a good meal can really bore them quickly; not to say that all children will act up but it can be very stressful. Even places like Olive Garden as much as they are family oriented we'd probably arm with plenty of crayons, books, quiet toys and things to keep our daughter distracted 'if' she starts to get bored.

As a childfree person, I do sometimes find it irritating when people insist they can bring their children to restaurants and let them run around and make loud noise. When I go to eat somewhere formal I'm there to relax and talk in peace and it really is distracting when kids are running around rampunt and being noisy like kids just are.

I also think that for a parent, wouldn't it be nicer to have an environment where you don't have to worry about being judged by people or get dirty looks thrown in your direction? The kids would have more fun if they were able to run around and play in a restaurant which was suited for this? As a kid I *loved* a restaurant that had a massive play area at one end with ball pits and tube slides! It was much more fun than just sitting by the table when waiting for food.

I completley understand that parents are adults too who want to go out and eat, but I don't understand why they'd want to go to a fancy restaurant with their kids if they are too young to be guarenteed to sit still and not yell/cry. Doesn't it defeat the purpose of a relaxing grown-ups meal? Personally I think if it were me and I wanted to go to somewhere formal to eat then I'd try and find a babysitter and enjoy a nice adult evening with my SO, and if I wanted a family meal out with my toddlers then I'd take them somewhere a little more family friendly.

I don't go. Mostly for my own children rather than other people.

I don't want to subject sitting them on this chair for most likely more than 1 hour between getting the menu and cheque. My children are very active, they like to run around, to talk and play.

They simply would not enjoy upscale dinning. I suppose if you have very well-behaved children that are ok with simply coloring and eating for one hour, I don't see a problem. My children don't fall into the perfectly behaved children category.

The article was pointing mostly at toddlers, therefore age 1-2. I know of a few toddlers which could possibly remain quietly seated the whole time, but would they enjoy this much more than something like McDonalds (slide, tubes etc..) or family sit down(everything is loud anyways)? Most likely not.

I would be reluctant to take a toddler to upscale dining. It is not within their skill set to sit and be quiet that long. I see no troubles bringing older children who can sit and be calm. My mother started my upscale dining experiences when I was about 7. I was taken to all manner of resturantes and for my 8th birthday I was taken out for steak and lobster and ballroom dancing. At the time my brother was 4 and he sat and was quiet. I do not think children should be excluded from fancy dining after all, how are they supposed to get used to it and know how to behave if they do not go?

I don't think toddlers should go to upscale dining simply because it's a lot to ask from them.

However, I know quite a few kids (aged 5 and up) who are great and very well behaved at restaurants. I don't understand it when parents can't control 8 year olds (or don't even attempt) and it's really unfair to the other guests and your waiter. Nothing like taking 6 people's orders while two are screaming and fighting.

We do the following -when he was an infant we only went if we knew he'd be sleeping. When he was old enough to be in a high chair we didn't go out on the later side (i.e. not past 7pm) and no matter what time it was if he screamed for more than a few seconds he was taken out (happened only a few times). When we have gone to fancier places it's been around 5-5:30pm and we leave by 7 or earlier -so, not when most people are dining out- or we go during the week at lunch time if it a a mostly empty place. We frequent more casual/midrange restaurants where the music is loud enough to drown out his noise -and it's not screaming -usually louder babbling or an occasional squeal that is no louder than the conversation and/or drowned out (or we're seated far away from people). He stays in the high chair the entire time -no running around.

Interesting situation last Sunday -at the next table was a group of 30-something guys (it was around 515pm, midrange restaurant) - I think they muttered something when they saw us at the next table and then began,according to my husband (I stepped away for a minute) cursing and talking about a stripper. Luckily my son is too young to understand. We both agreed that of course they had a "right" and we said nothing but in that case they were being far more disruptive than we were (well we weren't but potentially)

I brought my son like you did Batya to the resturantes all the time. But I did so before the purely adult crowd came in as you said. He stayed in the high chair. I used to bring toys and books and things for him to do or play the drop things on the floor game with him. I would read to him etc.....once he was done being still we went home. We never really had huge problems or anyone say anything. I was and still am reluctant to bring toddlers though more because it is immensely frustrating for them. If my son got antsy we just left.

We take our three year old to nice restaurants.

Sure, I could get a babysitter. But I want to spend time with my child and she enjoys it. She enjoys the food, the ambience... And she far prefers a nice restaurant over a cheap one. She has no problem sitting still and being quiet (she uses her "restaurant voice", which is usually quieter than the people at the table beside us), I bring pen and paper for her to draw and she make airplanes out of the napkins. But I do have to be very observant of her mood. Sometimes she can sit there long enough to enjoy coffee and dessert, but other times I'll grab the cheque and leave immediately when we finish eating because I can tell she's ready to burn off some energy.

I've never had dirty looks or comments.

I don't think any toddler should be in a formal restaurant. it's very disruptive.

I get really, really P.O'd when I pay money to go to a nice place and one couple has to ruin it for everyone by bringing a loud kid because they either a) think their kid is well behaved (NOT!) or b) they just don't want to pay the money for a babysitter.

If you simply must take a toddler out, go to a fast food place or a family dining place which caters to families. Don't ruin it for everyone by bringing the toddler to a formal place.

Older kids who can handle themselves and be quiet may be able to go though.

We take our three year old to nice restaurants.

 

Sure, I could get a babysitter. But I want to spend time with my child and she enjoys it. She enjoys the food, the ambience... And she far prefers a nice restaurant over a cheap one. She has no problem sitting still and being quiet (she uses her "restaurant voice", which is usually quieter than the people at the table beside us), I bring pen and paper for her to draw and she make airplanes out of the napkins. But I do have to be very observant of her mood. Sometimes she can sit there long enough to enjoy coffee and dessert, but other times I'll grab the cheque and leave immediately when we finish eating because I can tell she's ready to burn off some energy.

 

I've never had dirty looks or comments.

We were like this too. I do not like babysitters and never have. I never used one, I only ever had family meaning only 3 members of family that I trust implicitely babysit my son. Usually I wanted him with me. I enjoyed his company very much and he enjoyed mine. I wanted him to be able to experience all that he could.

I don't think any toddler should be in a formal restaurant. it's very disruptive.

And if they're not disruptive?

When I was a child post-toddler age I went to restaurants and was fine. I don't think anyone would reasonabley agree that an older child who can sit quietly and behave should be not allowed to go to restaurants. I just don't think formal restaurants are the best place for toddlers who can't be relied upon to sit still and not make too much noise, it's unfair that people should be disrupted by the noise when they're paying to have a relaxing meal out.

If you are absolutely certain your small child can be quiet then good for you, I just hope it's genuine and not parental rose-tinted glasses. If the child honestly is just sitting and playing in their seat while making no more noise or trouble than any adult customer then I see no issue.

I have seen some adult customers with pretty abysmal behavoir and they get to go to fancy dining. I wish we could eject them. They have no excuse at all.

This annoys me to no end at restaurants AND movie theatres. California parents are not considerate of anyone. I've gotten into quite a few unfortunate situations telling them exactly where they needed to go.

You'd think more family restaurants will make the atmosphere child friendly. I was bored as a bat going to any restaurant as a kid until my favorite fried chicken basket and fries showed up image removed

Bugaboo Creek restaurant accross is the only place I can think of (aside from filthy germ infested McD's play area) that has a talking moose on the wall and other moving decorations that kids love.

I have seen some adult customers with pretty abysmal behavoir and they get to go to fancy dining. I wish we could eject them. They have no excuse at all.

Right. People shouldn't be disruptive in nice restaurants (or theatres, for that matter). Children shouldn't have special treatment but they also shouldn't be shunned regardless of their behavior.

Bugaboo Creek restaurant accross is the only place I can think of (aside from filthy germ infested McD's play area) that has a talking moose on the wall and other moving decorations that kids love.

I love McD's playland.

...But then, I think germs are good for kids.

What I really hated as a waitress were dealing with families with small children. They typically bring their own food and leave a mess. They'll bring baby food and just leave the trash on the table. Or they ask for really weird dishes that I can't possibly ring up (like croutons and ranch dressing in a cup). Then I have to get the manager to override the computer and typically thy hold up all my other customers....

Not all parents are like this but some are.

I sister had a baby less then a year ago. She does a lot of the common sense things that others have posted about. One thing I don't get (maybe someone here can answer this) at nicer restaurants they don't have food targeted at toddlers/young children. When I way three I would make a holy mess eating pizza, burgers, etc. Why bring a kid to a place where there is a high chance there is nothing they will like?

I sister had a baby less then a year ago. She does a lot of the common sense things that others have posted about. One thing I don't get (maybe someone here can answer this) at nicer restaurants they don't have food targeted at toddlers/young children. When I way three I would make a holy mess eating pizza, burgers, etc. Why bring a kid to a place where there is a high chance there is nothing they will like?

The same reason a strip club doesn't have chicken fingers and milkshakes. It's not that kind of place.

Most kids eat potatoes or rice. Every place has potatoes, rice or softer meats. Sometimes I would feed him things from my plate or sometimes I brought food for him. Either way it is nice family time together. Because one has children is no reason to be shunned from society.