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Thread: My Girlfriend is active on a dating website, any suggestions?

  1. #1
    mateus
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    My Girlfriend is active on a dating website, any suggestions?

    Hello,

    I have been seeing a girl now for just over 2 months (we have been very close and are exclusive) and we were friends for 3 months before we started dating. It was nice that we were friends initially and had built up some trust between us.

    Anyway last week she mentioned that she had to take herself off a particular dating website as she was still getting emails. I guess just out of curiosity I had a look at this website and to my dismay found that she has been active within the last 24hours.

    I guess I could give her the benefit of the doubt for the short term (1 week) just incase she is figuring out how to take her profile off. Although if she continues to be always active within 24 hours then obviously something is not quite right here.

    How should I go about this situation and at what point do I raise the subject with her?

    Last edited by mateus; 02-07-2011 at 05:27 PM.

  2. #2
    abitbroken
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    When someone is "active" it could simply mean they checked their messages or even just logged in to change their settings - like setting their notifications off. SOME dating sites aren't accurate and even "fake" that a user is online to make new subscribers think the site is just bustling with activity from hotties. Also, when she says she is getting emails, she might not be getting emails from guys but could be simply getting site newsletters, etc etc. If she said she was taking herself off a website, then I would just take her word for it and trust her. If she signed up for a few of them, she could have forgotten about one of them especially if she had a free membership.

  3. #3
    slacker4life
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    you have to be upfront and politely ask if she is going to stay registered on that site. you can say that its important to you because you really like her and feel confused as to why she still has an active profile.

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    RedDress
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    I don't think that you have anything to worry about. She actually went out of her way to tell you that she's still on a site and still receiving messages. These are not the actions of someone trying to hide something - but rather, the actions of someone who is upfront and honest about stuff.

    Wait a week or so and if she still hasn't taken down her profile - ask if she got around to it.

    I wouldn't get all freaked out, though. It's early days and she went out of her way to be honest with you. I highly doubt there is anything fishy going on. She could just be saying her goodbyes to people she had made friends with (when I was doing the online thing, I still did and do keep in contact with some of the guys who weren't matches but were cool people).

  5. #5
    Jd1983
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    I don't think you should have anything to worry about. She openly volunteered the information to you, if she had anything to hide, she wouldn't feel the need to do so.

  6. #6
    Stay_home
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    At least she's being honest with you about it, that's a good thing. I say give her a couple weeks and then just ask her if she remembered to take it down.

  7. #7
    BriarRose
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    It takes 2 minutes to remove or hide a profile, and she's had a week. I would talk to her, and if she still doesn't remove it, I would put up a profile, too.

  8. #8
    sidehop
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    Quote Originally Posted by BriarRose [Register to see the link]
    It takes 2 minutes to remove or hide a profile, and she's had a week. I would talk to her, and if she still doesn't remove it, I would put up a profile, too.
    lol that's a bit passive-aggressive. I'd just tell her if it's still up "hey I saw your profile up still" and leave it at that.

  9. #9
    mateus
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    Thanks for the advice guys! Yes I guess its best to leave it a week or so and then I will mention it to her if the profile is still up.

  10. #10
    BriarRose
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    Quote Originally Posted by sidehop [Register to see the link]
    lol that's a bit passive-aggressive. I'd just tell her if it's still up "hey I saw your profile up still" and leave it at that.
    I would bet money that she'll just give him some lame excuse about checking emails or hasn't had time to take it down. She is his girlfriend, her profile should not be up on a dating site. This shouldn't even be open to discussion, he shouldn't even have to remind her.

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