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Thread: Legal Steps for Bullying?

  1. #31
    Platinum Member Applewhite's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Victoria66
    I got the names off his class picture. He does not remember names well. Unfortunately what do I do then start calling all those last names in the phone book? I am not saying it rudely really, I am more exasperated at the situation.

    I think though if there is another incident I am going to call the police because it is utterly ridiculous.
    I also don't think you should wait until there is another incident. Enough is enough. Please do something. I was bullied and even though it wasn't to the extent your son was bullied (it didn't escalate to physical injury) to this day I resent my parents for not stepping up.

  2. #32
    Platinum Member sidehop's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Victoria66
    I got the names off his class picture. He does not remember names well. Unfortunately what do I do then start calling all those last names in the phone book? I am not saying it rudely really, I am more exasperated at the situation.

    I think though if there is another incident I am going to call the police because it is utterly ridiculous.
    I would. If education comes before child's safety there's something wrong with the mentality of the school let alone the system itself. This isn't some name calling incident, it's physical violence.

  3. #33
    Silver Member sjjohnson89's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Victoria66
    He has taken it before. He did like it. The thing is my son is very naturally timid and with his own lack of social development it leaves him open to be a big target for others. Thanks for your reply it might be something he could consider doing again.
    I am a passive kind of person, i avoid confrontation where possible. But i did a little boxing a while back, this massively improved my confidence when in confrontational situations. Boxing didnt make me aggressive, it taut me self respect and to be assertive. I only ever got into one street fight, it ended with the first strike, no one ever confronted me again as not too many bullies will go after someone that fights back. A bully is steriotypically weak, they go round with their pack and find a 'weak' kid to pick on to make themselves feel better about their own insecurities. Being able to defend yourself should result in the bully leaving you alone, of course this isnt true in all cases and in which case something needs to be done by the higher authorities.

  4. #34
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Originally Posted by hike14
    I also don't think you should wait until there is another incident. Enough is enough. Please do something. I was bullied and even though it wasn't to the extent your son was bullied (it didn't escalate to physical injury) to this day I resent my parents for not stepping up.
    I have stepped in. I have been there. We have something in place now where he has an adult with him at all times.

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  6. #35
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    Originally Posted by sjjohnson89
    I am a passive kind of person, i avoid confrontation where possible. But i did a little boxing a while back, this massively improved my confidence when in confrontational situations. Boxing didnt make me aggressive, it taut me self respect and to be assertive. I only ever got into one street fight, it ended with the first strike, no one ever confronted me again as not too many bullies will go after someone that fights back. A bully is steriotypically weak, they go round with their pack and find a 'weak' kid to pick on to make themselves feel better about their own insecurities. Being able to defend yourself should result in the bully leaving you alone, of course this isnt true in all cases and in which case something needs to be done by the higher authorities.
    Oh I agree with you. They ARE cowards. Unfortunately they are big cowards and are twice my son's size so he has been a bit daunted. He is one of those little skinny fellows that has not had his growth spurt yet plus he is 9 months younger than most of his class. Two of these boys are the size of adult men.

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    Platinum Member thejigsup's Avatar
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    My son was bullied much like your son in 7th grade. There seemed to be nothing I could do legally and I worked for that school district! The police were involved but reluctant to take a hard stand against kids. Oh well, I just placed him in our home district, not where I worked, and he was fine. Actually had a lot of friends and made the basketball team. Move him, anything else is just too slow and he could get hurt.

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    Originally Posted by thejigsup
    My son was bullied much like your son in 7th grade. There seemed to be nothing I could do legally and I worked for that school district! The police were involved but reluctant to take a hard stand against kids. Oh well, I just placed him in our home district, not where I worked, and he was fine. Actually had a lot of friends and made the basketball team. Move him, anything else is just too slow and he could get hurt.
    That might be the next step Jig. It might be hard because he accepts change so poorly. It really makes him up in arms and very anxiety ridden. If anything else even remotely happens I am pulling him and taking him to the other school in our board here in town.

  9. #38
    Platinum Member Applewhite's Avatar
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    I like the above. But in addition I would be happy to hear that you sued the parents and won and you got a wakeup call. At the very MINIMUM they should be paying your son's medical expenses (and probably more for harassment and the emotional anguish, costs for switching schools etc). I would hope that in addition to switching schools you would set an example for society. I really do not see how society puts up with people like this.

  10. #39
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    I think the error people make with autistic kids is that they are going to stay naturally timid for life or are going to be socially behind all their lives. Unless your son has other issues, he should be able to thrive with people and with environments he takes interest in, even if he will just have "a few" close friends or not be into parties. I knew a couple of people that had very functional autism that took vocational training because they were extremely mechanically inclined. They got to socializing with kids with their own interests and it took them out of the loop of the general school population for half a day. Also, kids who can make cool things sometimes find that bullies soften up. The kid changes from someone they just can't really figure out so beat up to having a niche or recognizable talents.

    Originally Posted by Victoria66
    My son is a bit of a loner, because he is slightly autistic, he finds it hard to read the social ques correctly. So he has a few friends and a few people who defend him.

    Right now his EA has been turned into his "body guard" of sorts and he can not leave the school without her.

    The scary thing is he goes to a religious school.
    If it is a religious school - large schools always have their problems, but maybe you can use any counseling resources they may have. And also, if they pay to put their kids there, the kids parents are more likely to be involved and maybe you can introduce yourself at a parent's night and not be accusatory but work on a solution with them.

    Is the EA an educational assistant? If he goes to a religious school, maybe there are more avenues for counseling and conflict resolution and you should pursue it.

    Maybe suggest to the EA that the other kids be taught that he perceives things differently than them. Middle school is a prime time for kids to single others out who are different, but often they do it because they don't understand or fear someone's differences. There was a girl who used a wheel chair and she never got picked on at all because points her classmates knew it was something that wasn't contagious and her parents made it a point to have her involved with girl scouts and the school paper and as much as she wanted to be involved in. She was shy at first, but opened up. But then again, her shyness was due to her nervousness about being different and not part of any condition.

  11. #40
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    My sister has special needs (autism) and was bullied for a while. Basically, my parents threw a fit about how the school wasn't "providing for her educational needs" by letting her get bullied (she wasn't learning well as a result) and they threatened to sue so the school buckled down, got her 2 personal aides (this stopped the bullies) and it's been smooth sailing since. She really did need them though.

    I don't think most parents could do this though.

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