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Thread: Deceased one Facebook Birthday Message

  1. #1
    HESJUSTSTUPID
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    Deceased one Facebook Birthday Message

    I want to write something nice on a friends facebook for her birthday, she passed away 2 months ago. I'm kind of speechless and don't know what to say. I want to write something not to sad because she was a very happy person in life. ugh help !

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    Jd1983
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    Why not just write what you want to write to her?

    It has to be within you, not something from others.

    Go with how you feel, and say what's on your mind.

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    abitbroken
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    Why not skip writing on her facebook page and send a card or write a letter to her family, telling them you know it must be a tough time being your friend's birthday, but they continue to be in your thoughts and prayers and talk about how much she and they meant to you, and maybe share a touching story or something you miss the most. Some people think that you shouldn't bring up memories, but you know her parents or sister or whoever can't help but be thinking of her birthday and its nice to know someone who cares. It is just weird to me when it shows up on my wall or newsfeed that someone wrote on a deceased person's wall. This way it is something genuine you did privately that could really make a difference for someone. They are around to read messages and she is not.

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    Maroney555
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    Quote Originally Posted by abitbroken [Register to see the link]
    Why not skip writing on her facebook page and send a card or write a letter to her family, telling them you know it must be a tough time being your friend's birthday, but they continue to be in your thoughts and prayers and talk about how much she and they meant to you, and maybe share a touching story or something you miss the most. Some people think that you shouldn't bring up memories, but you know her parents or sister or whoever can't help but be thinking of her birthday and its nice to know someone who cares. It is just weird to me when it shows up on my wall or newsfeed that someone wrote on a deceased person's wall. This way it is something genuine you did privately that could really make a difference for someone. They are around to read messages and she is not.
    I really like this idea. It's VERY personable and although it's going to be a tough day for the family, I think them knowing that others are thinking of THEM on this tough day can really help them through the process.

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    _Asti_
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    Part of grieving though is 'talking' to the deceased person. So even though yes the friend won't get to read her message, OP can still feel like she is 'talking' to her.

    Alot of professionals recommend writing letters to your loved one who has passed, its not a weird thing to do. It helps.

    While sending a card is nice to the family, its supporting the family and letthing them know you're thinking of them and of her. She isn't 'directly' dealing with her feelings and sharing words to the deceased person directly, and I think thats pretty important.

    I write letters to my Mom all the time. Little notes, its cleanses me emotionally and I feel a connection..and she obviously doesn't read it!

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