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Thread: Thekid55's Healing Journal

  1. #31
    Platinum Member The_Seeker's Avatar
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    I'm exactly the same way. It's tough. I think this is called the Hero Syndrome?

  2. #32
    Platinum Member thekid55's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by The_Seeker
    I'm exactly the same way. It's tough. I think this is called the Hero Syndrome?
    It's Codependency. We smother, overanalyze, sometimes obsess about the other person. We think they NEED our love.

  3. #33
    Platinum Member The_Seeker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by thekid55
    It's Codependency. We smother, overanalyze, sometimes obsess about the other person. We think they NEED our love.
    I recommend reading astrocafe about who you are. It's probably more accurate of who you are.

    You're right, it is definitely codependency. I wonder if it would be better if two people are co-dependents on each other.

  4. #34
    Silver Member C_Unknown2005's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by thekid55
    It's Codependency. We smother, overanalyze, sometimes obsess about the other person. We think they NEED our love.
    YEP, That said's it all.... My relationship was based on codependency... Just took a couple of weeks for figure that one out.

    The_seeker:
    A serious relationship (in my opion) is based on co-dependents on some level

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  6. #35
    Platinum Member thekid55's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by The_Seeker
    I recommend reading astrocafe about who you are. It's probably more accurate of who you are.

    You're right, it is definitely codependency. I wonder if it would be better if two people are co-dependents on each other.
    The only problem with that is, when one person starts to check out of the relationship, the other person will get crushed when they are ultimately broken up with.

  7. #36
    Platinum Member thekid55's Avatar
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    Had a pretty good day today.

    I'm really starting to feel like myself.

    I know that ENA is littered with stories of people getting dumped and their partner immediately rebounding.

    My situation is not like that at all.

    I guess my ex has 'rebounded' to a new group of girlfriends. Obviously a novelty. She knows all of my moves, how I'll react in situations, etc. I'm working on making changes for the better for my next relationship.

    So my question?

    Do you think it matters if your ex rebounds to another partner or not? If it does, why?

    Just trying to see what people think when an ex does not rebound.

  8. #37
    Platinum Member The_Seeker's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by thekid55
    Had a pretty good day today.

    I'm really starting to feel like myself.

    I know that ENA is littered with stories of people getting dumped and their partner immediately rebounding.

    My situation is not like that at all.

    I guess my ex has 'rebounded' to a new group of girlfriends. Obviously a novelty. She knows all of my moves, how I'll react in situations, etc. I'm working on making changes for the better for my next relationship.

    So my question?

    Do you think it matters if your ex rebounds to another partner or not? If it does, why?

    Just trying to see what people think when an ex does not rebound.
    I don't know if my ex rebounds on someone else or not. LOL I haven't been on facebook because I deleted the account.

    If my ex rebounds to another, then I know for a fact that I would give him the toughest option that I plan to use if he asked me back. I'm not a saint and I'm not going to play nice and sympathy card. It was his choice. I am not in control of him.

    If my ex doesn't, it just shows he was hurt like I am and that we're probably thinking what went wrong. Yes, he and I think very much alike.

    We'll see what happens.

  9. #38
    Silver Member C_Unknown2005's Avatar
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    It's hurts to be replaced kid, Like you I put my heart and soul into the relationship thinking that she was the one for me. I was so in a love drunk with this girl that I didn't see the end coming. I'm not perfect nor will ever be I had my moments in the relationship that I wish could have been different but it's over. It hurt's because you feel like all the effort and love you put in didn't matter. Heck, through out the relationship i would call everyday to wake her up and call to say goodnight, I would open the car door for her anywhere we went to. And every-time i said "I love you" I meant it.

    It hurts because for me I loved her mind and her flaws. I loved her soul.

  10. #39
    Platinum Member thekid55's Avatar
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    I know my ex was very, very hurt post-breakup. She did rebound like most do people, post-breakup.

    She has tried to cover it up online, but she told me that she was hurt. She didn't say anything about getting back together.

  11. #40
    Silver Member C_Unknown2005's Avatar
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    You can't worry about her wanting to come back unless she contacts you.

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