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"Masculine" women, "feminine" men and infertility


newwave

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This is something I've been wondering about and maybe someone knows. I am more of a masculine woman than many. I tend to gain muscles easier than most women and I am somewhat aggressive. I do have a high voice though and look like a woman. I've come to the conclusion I probably produce more testoterone than most women. Because I am a more dominant person than many women I tend to seek out men who are more feminine. The guy I want to be with has a high voice, not very masculine at all and small "down there". Even if I don't end up with him I seek out men like this because my personal preference is they tend not to be chauvinists. The big burly masculine guys do nothing for me.

 

I know I shouldn't worry about this but it does make me wonder if I can even conceive anyway.

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No offense... but work on your issues and find a person to marry first before worrying about that.

 

I agree... I'm not sure what you are implying? That because you are "masculine"(to you) you can't conceive? That's absurd.... I'm feminine(very much so actually)--and I do have a pretty soft pear shaped body, I'm also attracted to feminine(pretty boys) looking men. I have never thought that my attraction and my qualities have anything to do with if I am able to conceive or not. Where exactly did you come to that sort of conclusion??????

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I wouldn't consider your preferences or masculinity an issue, but I do know that there are many "big burly masculine" guys who are great catches and not at all chauvinistic.

 

As far as your question, I don't think you have enough evidance based on the information you gave us to dertermine whether or not your testosterone levels are high, but a doctor can. They can also tell you if it would effect your fertility. We would all be guessing.My guess is no.

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I think I know what the OP is asking. She says she wonders if she produces more testosterone than other women being that she's more aggressive and produces more muscle mass and whatnot, and she wonders if this will have any effect on her abilitly to conceive being that she thinks she produces more of the male hormone.

 

The ovaries produce progesterone, estrogen, and FSH. From what I've learned, the female body needs to carry the right amount of these hormones, especially progesterone, for everything to function properly as far as being fertile is concerned. If you are having regular periods, chances are that you are ovulating each month and that you are fertile. I don't think being more masculine will cause you to be infertile, nor will a man being more feminine will cause him to be infertile.

 

You can go to your doctor and have a blood test done to see where your hormone levels are and you can seek a fertility specialist to check if your ovaries are functioning properly

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I agree... I'm not sure what you are implying? That because you are "masculine"(to you) you can't conceive? That's absurd.... I'm feminine(very much so actually)--and I do have a pretty soft pear shaped body, I'm also attracted to feminine(pretty boys) looking men. I have never thought that my attraction and my qualities have anything to do with if I am able to conceive or not. Where exactly did you come to that sort of conclusion??????

 

I don't think she came to any "conclusion". She's just wondering about it and asking for opinions..

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I don't think she came to any "conclusion". She's just wondering about it and asking for opinions..

 

Yes maybe so, but it was still an interesting question and really is far off(as another poster had indicated). I'm curious as to why she is thinking about that, or why she thinks she is masculine.

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What is your definition of muscular? Like I have some muscles in my body - but do I stack up to a girl who lifts for a living? Hell no. Do I stack up to a yoga chick who has a bump in her bicep? Meh - we might be able to compete. My point is, muscle definition varies between people.

 

Are you a bodybuilder? Has your Dr confirmed your testosterone levels are above average for a lady? Just looking for some background information.

 

I still dont get what the question is or the point. I also agree with the others who think there are other issues that you should work on before wondering if you can conceive.

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Right. Btw I do have very regular menstrual periods on the dot literally.

 

Btw, for those asking why I'm asking it's just something I am curious about. I am not planning to conceive until the time is right. I am just curious though because natural chemicals do affect whether we can have children or not.

 

As for me being muscular if I wanted to I could be a bodybuilder. However because I don't lift weights all the time I'm not at that level. When I do workout a lot though I get big and bulky which is why I switched to yoga. I have no fat at all on my legs and arms and they are solid.

 

Not to get off topic but I'm not interested in big burly men so dating them as well as having kids with them is out. I prefer nerds and many of them are very feminine in appearance.

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You don't know that you have a higher than average level of testosterone and I for one don't know how supposing you had it could affect your fertility...

 

...but frankly it's irrelevant. The biggest factor affecting your ability to conceive (apart from being single) is your age, which you can do nothing about.

 

However, I did read an interesting article about exposure to testosterone in the womb and how that can affect a womans temperament i.e. assertiveness or aggression. Apparently one of the indicators was the ring finger to index finger ratio. In women the index finger and ring finger should be roughly the same length, but some women (myself included!) have a longer ring finger. I can't find the article I want but here's an explanation on Wikipedia link removed.

 

BTW, how do you know the guy you like is small down there when the two of you haven't had sex? I really hope he never reads any of this. Not that I think he will. As for not liking big burly men, I'm sure you're not alone in your preference. I'm not sexually attracted to that kind of guy either, in the same way I'm not attracted to men with really short hair (buzz cuts) or guys that are football fanatics. Those things just turn me off. My ex had long(ish) hair, glasses, was slim and loved nothing more than drinking tea and playing his guitar but let me assure you, he was ALL man!

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My mom has like 12-13% bodyfat. She is 48. She is very lean and tiny(she is 113 pounds and 5ft6). She had 4 children, and got pregnant with twins(but miscarried) this year. Her being "masculine" in her body size never prevented her fertility. If anything she HAD to get her tubes tied to stop having children, and 20 years later(she had all 4 kids by the time she was 29) with her tubes being tied she got pregnant yet again. It could very well be from an objective view that having a very low body fat percentage for a woman, being naturally lean, tiny, athletic, VERY outspoken and aggressive--would result in her not being fertile. But it isn't true at all. Interestingly I did read somewhere that women with bigger "hips" had more estrogen or something of that nature and were said to be fertile(which would mean I'm very fertile) but that is just a myth.

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You don't know that you have a higher than average level of testosterone and I for one don't know how supposing you had it could affect your fertility...

 

...but frankly it's irrelevant. The biggest factor affecting your ability to conceive (apart from being single) is your age, which you can do nothing about.

 

However, I did read an interesting article about exposure to testosterone in the womb and how that can affect a womans temperament i.e. assertiveness or aggression. Apparently one of the indicators was the ring finger to index finger ratio. In women the index finger and ring finger should be roughly the same length, but some women (myself included!) have a longer ring finger. I can't find the article I want but here's an explanation on Wikipedia link removed

 

Yep in terms of research the ONLY real issues I've noticed that effect fertility are genes, disorders/diseases, personal health, and age. I think age and disorders are the biggest blockers to "fertility" everything else is fair game.

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by very feminine do you mean the nerds you prefer have soft features, less muscle def., nonexistent facial hair, etc?

 

I forgot to add. My former supervisor has this really high pitched, feminine quality to his voice, but his face is rugged and he has facial hair and is hairy in general. When I first heard him speak it threw me off for a second because my voice is deeper than his and looking at him I didn't expect to hear that type of voice.

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We checked each other and he was very small. It was very strange because most guys I've been with have been good size. Small means nothing to me.

 

 

 

Yes, not very hairy, soft features, etc. The guy I want has a mustache but it's very small, almost a line actually. He's a little hairy, but this is because of his genetics (he's Italian).

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newwave, is this the guy who is no longer contacting you?

 

 

As for fertility, the only thing I can suggest is that you visit your dr to check your fertility levels. I don't think that going on "feminity" or "masculinity" really will tell you anything. The women in my family are what I would describe as "feminine" but there is still a high miscarriage rate.

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Newwave, I don't think your sexual preferences have anything to do with the amount of testosterone you produce. Another poster pointed out that testosterone exposure in the womb may determine your character and I have also read something similar but I don't think the testosterone you are producing now has anything to do with it. I think sometimes people seek partners that complement themselves i.e. have qualities that they don't so perhaps if you consider yourself more "masculine" in personality or looks then you maybe looking for someone to complement that, perhaps a more "feminine" man.

 

I don't necessarily think that because you have muscles that you are producing a high or too high level of testosterone. If you are a very slim woman then when you build muscles it is going to be more obvious compared to a woman with more body fat. You are also having regular periods which indicates that you are ovulating. There is a condition called polycystic ovary syndrome that can cause fertility problems and women with this condition have elevated levels of testosterone. Symptoms can include irregular periods, weight gain, acne, excess body hair (for example on the face, stomach, back). You are having regular periods so I would imagine this is unlikely in your case. If you are worried go to your doctor, even just for peace of mind.

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I know someone with that condition but no I don't have it. I don't experience any of the other symptoms at all, though I tend to gain weight when I don't workout. It's probably nothing to worry about but I do know pregnancy aside I prefer these guys because of my personality. Because I am so dominant I only get along with somewhat submissive men. When I dated dominant men we only fight whereas a submissive (though I hate to use that word) we get along.

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I know someone with that condition but no I don't have it. I don't experience any of the other symptoms at all, though I tend to gain weight when I don't workout. It's probably nothing to worry about but I do know pregnancy aside I prefer these guys because of my personality. Because I am so dominant I only get along with somewhat submissive men. When I dated dominant men we only fight whereas a submissive (though I hate to use that word) we get along.

 

Your preferences has nothing to do with your hormones as far as I know. If you had high testosterone level, you would have other symptoms.

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I hope he contacts me soon, but if not then I'll look for a guy like him. I want any children to have a nerd for a father because I'm attracted to nerds.

 

What happened to what you said yesterday about focusing on your career?? You really need to stop hoping he'll contact you and get on with your life. And stop thinking about your fertility because good or bad, you can't change it. I understand that pregnancy is one of your goals and while I don't think it'll happen for you, if you're as serious about it as you say you are, start taking steps to achieve it. By that I mean, focus 100% on finding a job, meet NEW people, save money. Less time posting on a forum equals less time to obsess about some guy who never calls you.

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