I've been with someone for over 2.5 years now. We have been and are very much in love, we were even engaged at one point, but that was called off due to>>We had several months of complete no contact a few months ago because she cheated on me.
So we separated for several months. I took care of some things in my life, felt good about myself, and was (still am) generally TCB.
I've come to the conclusion that my girlfriend can only hurt me as much as I let her. So I am finding it difficult to be really close to her. Intimacy is difficult, and I certainly am jealous/dismayed/disgusted when thoughts of her and others, and of the cheating pop into my head.
I don't know if she'll cheat again...not really worried about that, as if she does, it will say so much more about her than it would ever say about me.
I do get troubled by the thoughts/images I mentioned though. I wouldn't say it's a deal breaker...and it doesn't happen all the time, but it can be tough to tolerate sometimes, and I become emotionally distant and upset.
Anyone have any advice on the subject matter? I will be seeing a therapist, and I informed my girlfriend of some of these things so the communication is open.
Just not sure what to do. I mean, this was all fairly recent...so would those thoughts images get better over time? Or? Can a relationship survive infidelity?
What can I do?