Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 28

Thread: found a condom in his wallet. help

  1. #1
    skysthelimit12

    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    2

    found a condom in his wallet. help

    I don't even know what to say plz help. I found a condon in my boyfriends wallet. I don't feel he is cheating. I don't have that gut feeling but I snooped and found a condom. We don't use them. Been together 5yrs. Live together. He is 22. I am 23. What is the deal? Does this mean he is cheating? When I confronted him he was so angry I snooped. He said he is not cheating but did not give me a clear cut reason why it was there. He said it just was. He said look hard enough and you will find what you are looking for. He has asked me to go in his wallet before for money so I guess I assumed it was ok. I don't know what to think. I went to work and didn't talk to him all day. I hung out with friends n stayed out until 4. When I got home he was asleep and woke me up to talk about it. He said he is not cheating n just wants me to trust him. He is mad bc I always snoop or question him. Im just so worried things will mess up. Its like a self fulfilling prohpecy. Plz help.

    P.s. years ago he found text n pix from other guys in my phone but has since forgiven me.

  2. #2
    friend358
    Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    22
    If you have been together 5 years and don't use condoms, you have every right to be suspicious of him cheating by finding a condom in his wallet. Has he given you any other reason to be suspicious?

    Make him tell you why the condoms were in there. If you have been together for 5 years, the issue shouldn't be why you were in his wallet. Maybe you shouldn't have been in his wallet, but the condom issue is WAY more important.

  3. #3
    Miss Firecracker
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    8,528
    Gender
    Female
    I'm guessing you didn't look at the expiration date. If it was 2005, it may be true. If it was 2012... well...

    If I found a condom in my husband's wallet, I would KNOW he was cheating.

  4. #4
    PaleSeptember
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    264
    An ex who cheated on me and lied messed with my head telling me things like I should just trust him, without there ever being an explanation that made sense (and he usually wouldn't give one anyway). So, you always snoop or question him? Why do you do that? I'm guessing this isn't the first suspicious thing that's come up.

  5. #5
    fastball2113
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    333
    Gender
    Male
    why do you snooping?
    if you're snooping that means you don't trust him...why be in the relationship?
    what's the expiration date?
    what're you willing to do if he is cheating?

    all things you should think about

  6. #6
    Sparkly Eyes

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    4,935
    Gender
    Female
    Suspicious. He didn't give you a clear explanation so there is no reason to just "trust him".

  7. #7
    Miss Firecracker
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    8,528
    Gender
    Female
    Strange you've been with a man 5 years and you get chewed for being in his wallet. My husband tells me to get things out of his. He has nothing in there, never has and I know never will. He has never cared a bit if I look in his wallet, his e-mail, his bedroom drawers, suitcases, he is an open book. A man that is truly innocent will open his world to you. If you feel like you are in a museum around his things, there is a problem. I'd bet money.

    I have a cousin that treated his wife that way, and he was cheating on her the entire time with a young girl. He even ended up marrying her. And of course he cheated on her the whole time and they finally divorced.

  8. #8
    Sparkly Eyes

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    4,935
    Gender
    Female
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Firecracker [Register to see the link]
    Strange you've been with a man 5 years and you get chewed for being in his wallet. My husband tells me to get things out of his. He has nothing in there, never has and I know never will. He has never cared a bit if I look in his wallet, his e-mail, his bedroom drawers, suitcases, he is an open book. A man that is truly innocent will open his world to you. If you feel like you are in a museum around his things, there is a problem. I'd bet money.

    I have a cousin that treated his wife that way, and he was cheating on her the entire time with a young girl. He even ended up marrying her. And of course he cheated on her the whole time and they finally divorced.
    I don't understand why serial cheaters feel the need to settle down. I mean why not just be free and sleep around?

  9. #9
    Miss Firecracker
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    8,528
    Gender
    Female
    Quote Originally Posted by worriedgirl [Register to see the link]
    I don't understand why serial cheaters feel the need to settle down. I mean why not just be free and sleep around?
    They need regular sex, and someone to lean on. When people sleep around, there are bound to be dry spells where they can't get all their needs met. That is why they pick one to settle down with. It's just plain selfishness.

  10. #10
    skysthelimit12

    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    2
    he has never given me a reason to believe he is cheating..hes always home or we are always on weekend vacation somewhere or doing things with my family or his family...but why have it!? when I asked him that he said he was not cheating it was just in there because it was in there and no matter what he told me i was not going to believe him. I asked him if it was for "just in case" purposes and he laughed at me. he told me I was thinking way to into it and it was just there because. He told me he knows sometimes i would randomly be in his wallet for things (money, etc) and why would he try to be hiding it there. Idk what to do?? is this a maturity thing or age thing ? I just dont know ..i love him so much he is so affectionate, tells me I am his best friend, our families love eachother, nothing else is weird, our home, finances etc. just this issue. He tells me there are things i have done in the past that he has forgotten about and forgiven and that I need to stop worrying and truly trust him. A friend of mine told me not to nag or worry because if he is cheating it will naturally just unfold itself. True or no? THANK U!

  11.  

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Top Threads
Struggling with hunting husband
Hey All, I'm having an internal struggle with myself and could use some words of advice. To start, I know people get all worked up about this
Jealousy? Self esteem and Lies.
Hi I'm new here and really don't know where else to turn. :( :sorrow: I'll be brief and all feedback is welcome. Long term relationship, 3 years
Girlfriend confessed some things that don't really bother me, but I fear she wants to dump me
So a little over a week ago, my gf of 2 years told me that she feels that she has compromised a lot of herself to be with me and fears for the future
Sex Obsessed Boyfriend Is Driving Me Crazy!!!
[B]My boyfriend has always loved sex. We have been together for over 2 years, but recently his love for sex has turned into more of an obsession and
Political Conflict
Looking for advice and people's experiences! I am questioning the relationship I am currently in. We have been together for several years and met
Priority?
Hi guys I really need help. I have been dating my boyfriend for over a year now and I love him so much, but lately I feel like there is no room for
Stuck between TWO MEN!
In a tough situation. I was with my ex-boyfriend for 9 months, letís call him ďJohnĒ. We have a lot of things in common in that we love animals, we
Featured Threads
What eNotAlone gave you?
I wonder mostly about long-time members who decided to be a part of this community. Has this forum enriched your lives, and if so, in what
How to end things with him
Iíve been dating this guy for 2 months. In the beginning he was very sweet and romantic, however I learned in the last month or so that he is
My ex bf told me he wants sex, nudes and me to loan him money until he's stable... Should I lend $?
Hello.. I am 22 I met my ex bf (21) 3 years ago in college. He dropped out of college after the first semester.. he didn't go to finals. He stayed in
How Should I have handled it?
My GF and I were together for about 5 months. Things were great except for some of my questioning her online activity which challenged her. All
My Ex Husband still berates me
Hello, first off I am not sure why I am on a forum but.. I need an anonymous outlet I guess because my friends and family all say the same thing
Yall ready for a messed up one...
Okay, so i cheated on my bf about 6 month ms into our relationship with a guy 20 years older then me at our work. And it was a rule that it was only
Iím at a really bad state of mind right now
Itís been a little over the month since the breakup, since then, heís messaged me 2-3 times about random topics (that I donít care about), and has
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •