Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 13

Thread: How to dominate your man

  1. #1
    Lady Rashomon
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    560

    How to dominate your man

    As my husband and I have been in the process of normalizing our relationship and bringing things back into equilibrium, sex has definitely become a much more prominent issue--which is great, since we're doing it more often.

    We're also exploring ways to be more adventurous in bed (and everywhere else), and one of the things I've been contemplating is dominating him while we're having sex. This may not seem that adventurous but I've typically been more submissive. I'd like to change that up, but I'm not entirely sure how to do so without lapsing into "Is this okay, honey?" or "What would you like me to do?" which would sort of defeat the purpose.

    So my question to men out there is: Do you enjoy it when women are dominant in bed and take the lead as far as telling you what to do? Are there particular things that you like or dislike?

  2. #2
    SapphireNoir10
    Super Moderator SapphireNoir10's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    11,950
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    105
    Suggest mild bondage, like handcuffs or tying his hands behind his head. Or blindfolding?

  3. #3
    shuttlefish
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    988
    Quote Originally Posted by HarboiledEgg [Register to see the link]
    Do you enjoy it when women are dominant in bed and take the lead as far as telling you what to do? ?
    oh yes,.

    First step - you need the clothes. You can't dominate a guy wearing some wispy little lingerie outfit. Get yourself some butch gear - black leather and so on - use your imagination.

    Days in advance (of your attack lol) make him up a check list of things you could do to him/with him. He can check off what he is into or not.

    Good luck!

  4. #4
    Scott12
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    323
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by shuttlefish [Register to see the link]
    oh yes,.

    First step - you need the clothes. You can't dominate a guy wearing some wispy little lingerie outfit. Get yourself some butch gear - black leather and so on - use your imagination.

    Days in advance (of your attack lol) make him up a check list of things you could do to him/with him. He can check off what he is into or not.

    Good luck!
    Asking his permission isn't dominating him and neither is letting him know what you're going to do in advance.

    OP,

    Being dominant really means being dominant...which means taking total control. Come up behind him one evening and turn him around. Grab his belt and lead him to the bed. When you get there, shove him back on the bed and start unbuckling his belt and go down on him. Talk very dirty. Then take your clothes off and sit on his face for him to go down on you. Rake your nails down his back, smack his butt and generally have your way with him. If you've never done it before, give him a rimjob. Whatever you do...DO NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER!

    Scott

  5. #5
    Lady Rashomon
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    560
    Quote Originally Posted by Scott12 [Register to see the link]
    Asking his permission isn't dominating him and neither is letting him know what you're going to do in advance.

    OP,

    Being dominant really means being dominant...which means taking total control. Come up behind him one evening and turn him around. Grab his belt and lead him to the bed. When you get there, shove him back on the bed and start unbuckling his belt and go down on him. Talk very dirty. Then take your clothes off and sit on his face for him to go down on you. Rake your nails down his back, smack his butt and generally have your way with him. If you've never done it before, give him a rimjob. Whatever you do...DO NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER!

    Scott
    All very good advice! I think my major stumbling block is putting my pleasure before his. In his words, he wants me to use him like a blow-up doll, which is a little weird for me. I'm turned on by the idea, but our sexual exchanges have always been mutual (bordering more on the side of me pleasing him, to be honest) so getting myself into the proper mindset is definitely challenging! Maybe I should just script it out and see what happens?

  6. #6
    Scott12
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    323
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by HarboiledEgg [Register to see the link]
    All very good advice! I think my major stumbling block is putting my pleasure before his. In his words, he wants me to use him like a blow-up doll, which is a little weird for me. I'm turned on by the idea, but our sexual exchanges have always been mutual (bordering more on the side of me pleasing him, to be honest) so getting myself into the proper mindset is definitely challenging! Maybe I should just script it out and see what happens?

    Okay, I see what you're saying. In that case, skip the part about going down on him, and move straight to the sitting on his face. Position him exactly how you want him and YOU control the movement during sex, not him. If it helps, construct an alternate persona, like you're playing a part in a porno. YOU may care about his pleasure, but the CHARACTER you're playing is all about getting hers. Hope that helps.

    Scott

  7. #7
    shuttlefish
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    988
    Quote Originally Posted by Scott12 [Register to see the link]
    Asking his permission isn't dominating him and neither is letting him know what you're going to do in advance.

    OP,



    Scott
    Well there's a fine line between dominating someone and raping someone. I've done some dominating before and I've found it handy to have some kind of idea about what is welcome and what isn't beforehand, and not during and in the heat of the moment.

    A genuine cry of "oh my god, dear god please dont do that, you disturbing, sadistic pervert" tends to ruin the moment....and then quickly the fantasy role playing.

    There is still the element of surprise since the "checklist" is done days earlier.

    But whatever works for the OP I suppose.

  8. #8
    KG
    Platinum Member KG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    2 miles east of Hicksville
    Posts
    6,111
    Gender
    Male
    I had a dominant woman once. She would tell me, "get in the bedroom right now. Take off your clothes, and stand there waiting for me to have my way with you."

    Then she would give me instructions....do this to her, don't move a muscle while I'm doing this to you. "After I've climaxed 5 times, it will be your turn."

    And we always had a "safe" word, in case it got out of hand. "Spaghettios", LOL!

    But pretty hot stuff at the time.

  9. #9
    greywolf
    Platinum Member greywolf's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Good question...
    Age
    30
    Posts
    10,343
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    12
    Quote Originally Posted by HarboiledEgg [Register to see the link]
    All very good advice! I think my major stumbling block is putting my pleasure before his. In his words, he wants me to use him like a blow-up doll, which is a little weird for me. I'm turned on by the idea, but our sexual exchanges have always been mutual (bordering more on the side of me pleasing him, to be honest) so getting myself into the proper mindset is definitely challenging! Maybe I should just script it out and see what happens?
    He wants you to use his body like it's your little sex toy. He wants to feel like you own his body and you can do whatever you please with it. That's what he's asking for.

    Throw him onto a bed, tie or handcuff his hands above his head, then sit on his face. Grab his hair and pull on it to direct him to the right spot.

    Quote Originally Posted by shuttlefish [Register to see the link]
    A genuine cry of "oh my god, dear god please dont do that, you disturbing, sadistic pervert" tends to ruin the moment....and then quickly the fantasy role playing.
    .
    How does that ruin the moment? That is hot.

  10. #10
    perth_man87
    Bronze Member perth_man87's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Australia
    Age
    23
    Posts
    241
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by greywolf [Register to see the link]
    vHow does that ruin the moment? That is hot.
    I think they meant that if you accidentally take it too far you can have a safe word and all that but it's still really going to kill the mood. Their idea about domination might be different (less or more extreme or just plain different) to what yours is. For example I like the idea of a girl really having her way with me rough, but all that leather and bondage doesn't appeal to me at all.

  11.  

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Top Threads
Should I Tell Her I'm a Virgin?
Hi everyone, I've been dating this girl for about 2 months now. Everything is somehow going very well - I use the word "somehow" because i'm a
My bf is very...non-physical
Rarely do we ever kiss, hug, cuddle. We have sex 2-3 times a month. Have only had sex in our bed, an that is also the only time he will freely
Husband Won't Go Down on Me
SO.....when we first started dating I gave him oral and he didn't return, I never had oral from a guy, or a girl,,lol,,,but I just thought since we
I have no interest in having any form of intimacy with my boyfriend.
Hi, first ever post on here - I'm just in need of some advice on something. I'm 20 and my boyfriend is 29 - we have been together for almost a
With the fiancÚ
So we are getting hitched in July I reckon. I'm not going to lie our sex life hasn't been all that great the past few months, I understand that w/
Gentlemanly/shy guy feeling inept with initiating sex
We have been dating only 2 1/2 months, and have taken things intentionally slow. So we are just now getting to the "getting intimate" stage. We've
Did my Military Husband Cheat on Me?
Hello again! I have another question I would love to get advice on. So.....my husband was caught texting a coworker. How did I catch him you ask?
Featured Threads
Ugly pictures
We had a professional photographer come in at work. I used the photo and put it on my dating profile. But when my Roomie saw it,she said take it
Not being "too" available.
I posted a few days ago about the younger guy I've been dating for 6 months and how he doesn't want to use BG/GF labels. I got some great feedback
I am having difficulty accepting my boyfriends bisexuality for no reason
So here goes; the main reason why I got this account here is probably because I am so ashamed of myself and that because I am surrounded by either
relationship advice
hi... I'll start by saying i'm a guy, i just really needed a woman's point of view for this, so i hope you can help me! My mom is paying for my
Seeing ex tomorrow..so confused. Need advice!
Hi everyone. I'm really confused with my ex. Dated two years; he was very hurt by the breakup. He hasn't dated many people, and I was his first
Needing advice and/or support with ex girlfriend
Ok. Long story short... I ended up in a serious relationship with my best friend of 7 years. The last 3 years of which we were in a serious
I really need some advice and a outside opinion
I really don't know what to do ... My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now she is no longer attracted to me but tells me she loves
Ask For Advice

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •