I have a question regarding dumpers...

Let's say if a soon to be dumper has already made up in their mind that they are over you (emotionally, what not) and find another guy they leave you for, there is practically no chance of ever reconcilling correct?

I mean it's not like they would miss you, since in their mind they are done with you and the relationship right?

They might miss you when that relationship ends . . .

That's the thing, I don't consider my ex's relationship to be a rebound. But who really knows right?

However I know some of my own ex's actions after the breakup suggest she will miss the relationship she once had with me. But that maybe something out of comfort of the old.

she'll probably come back... but that doesn't mean all will be well. just my .02

Let's say if a soon to be dumper has already made up in their mind that they are over you (emotionally, what not) and find another guy they leave you for, there is practically no chance of ever reconcilling correct?she'll probably come back... but that doesn't mean all will be well. just my .02 I mean it's not like they would miss you, since in their mind they are done with you and the relationship right? That's the thing, I don't consider my ex's relationship to be a rebound. But who really knows right?However I know some of my own ex's actions after the breakup suggest she will miss the relationship she once had with me. But that maybe something out of comfort of the old.

My ex dumped me in November....jumped into a rebound because in her mind, we were finished and she was never coming back. Chapter was closed.

She came back just before Christmas......she ended the relationship with her rebound a few weeks before.

When we tried to get back together in the new year, I asked if she missed me while with the rebound...she said yes and no. She was there because in her mind, we were done and there was no going back......but then when things began to finalize (i.e. selling of the house, changing names on things) it became real and she didnt want it to be final, blah blah blah.

But, like insecurefool says, she may come back, but all might not be well.

Our reconciliation lasted about 4 months.....we have broken up for the last time

It's probably best that we set our minds to the dumper not wanting to reconcile. They've left us for whatever their reasons, and they had a lot more time to think about it than we did.

Of course there are always exceptions, but do you want to stop your healing to wait for something that probably will never happen? And, from those exceptions, it doesn't look like very many actually make it. They just seem to break up again later.

It's hard to do, but you need to practice switching your thinking from her to you. Whenever you are questioning what she might do, ask what you are going to do? And the answer can be as simple as make a grilled cheese sandwich or as complicated as planning a cruise vacation. The focus has to be about you now.

I really think it depends on the individual dumper. The one thing for sure is they have had time to process this and thus are ahead of us in timeframe.

We can't control what they are thinking... and I think the idea of "giving up control" over what they have decided, and gaining control over us (the only thing we truly have control over) is essential. There are no guarantees in life, and we may never hear from them again, or we might. Impossible to say. The only thing we know for sure is that we have the ability to give ourselves direction regardless of what they decide to do down the road.

Let me add, that if they were to reconsider, usually it will only be successful if there is significant time apart. By that time I'm sure we will have grown and not be the same as they last knew us.

Let's say if a soon to be dumper has already made up in their mind that they are over you (emotionally, what not) and find another guy they leave you for, there is practically no chance of ever reconcilling correct?she'll probably come back... but that doesn't mean all will be well. just my .02 I mean it's not like they would miss you, since in their mind they are done with you and the relationship right? That's the thing, I don't consider my ex's relationship to be a rebound. But who really knows right?However I know some of my own ex's actions after the breakup suggest she will miss the relationship she once had with me. But that maybe something out of comfort of the old.

what the hell?

is that a spambot on ENA??

"hey guys! I heard people with broken hearts like to buy replica handbags!"