Hey guys and gals,
I apologize in advance if I'm not following protocol by posting a new thread as my first post.
My girlfriend and I have been together for 19 months. She is amazing, the most caring, loving, amazing person I have ever met. I truly love her more than anything else in the world and want to marry her someday. Our relationship is great...mostly. It is pure bliss about 90% of the time. When it is great, it is amazing.
However there are times when we disagree or I do or say something (which normally, I mean nothing by it) that rubs her the wrong way. I'll almost immediately get that there is something wrong and try to apologize over and over and try to make the situation better. However, usually that just makes it worse and often for these big arguments, she will break up with me and stay mad/sad for a few days. Often times, it is recurring issues. Issues involving respect and care (two words that she says I lack at times). Every time she tells me to improve I take it to heart, and I feel like I do. It does take time and some issues take longer to resolve than others, but overall I feel like I keep making the same mistakes. Sometimes I feel like I'm not mature enough to fully understand what she is saying or stupid or something. (We are both in college, however she is two years older than me). I shouldn't be making these mistakes over and over, which are the reasons behind the really big arguments we have.
I really want things to work out, but more importantly I want her to be happy. I feel like I make her very happy most of the time, however I also hurt her and make her cry. I want to be everything for her, I want to be perfect. I know that isn't possible, but I feel like I should shrive for the best with her and be the best boyfriend for her. But it kills me to see her like this. I've thought about relationship counselors or even breaking up with her because I can't stand to see her cry, especially because I am the one to do this to her.
What can be done to improve this relationship? Also, how can I do better to work on the things I'm doing wrong so they don't happen again? Finally, how do I identify problems BEFORE they happen?
Thanks for listening and I look forward to any solutions.