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How can I stop attracting weird creepy men?


glucoze

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Okay.

Every day i get some weird creepy men hitting on me. It used to be flattering but now it's actually annoying. I mean today this one guy was following me all over the city. I kid you not. I got onto one train, he followed me. I moved to one side he moved right along. He sat right next to me and i felt like throwing a book at him. He was staring hardcore at me for a good 2 minutes. I felt so uncomfortable. I wanted to get up but i was afraid he'd grab me or something weird like that. (We were alone on the train) He then decided to finally ask me "Hey what's your number? what's your name?" I of course lied and said "Amanda.. and no" "you got a home phone?" "No." "You don't have a phone?" "no." He would NOT leave me alone. Question after question. After the third question i ignored him. I got really uncomfortable, and he kept saying how hot i was i thought this was very inappropriate. You don't follow me and harass me like come on.

And then something out of no where happened... i was downtown walking and I got offered a modeling gig. This woman and this photographer ambushed me. Really random. It didn't end there, aNOTHER guy was following me. They followed me into numerous stores into the mall. I got frustrated and left. i decided maybe they wouldn't follow me into the street, into the icecream shop.. wrong.

 

Ugh i am so annoyed! I don't want that kind of attention.

How on earth can I get these guys to back off? I'm not interested. I mean if a decent guy will come up to me and be NICE not perverted than of course i'll give you my number. But it's clear all these guys that come up to me just want sex.. and for my looks.

What? DO i have to give them the finger? Like what do i have to do to stop attracting this creepy guys..

 

And why is it the guys I AM interested in all act so timid and shy. Just stare, but guys i don't care for approach me with perverted pick up lines?

 

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wow what a shame =( That reminds me when this 30 something year old looking guy try to hit on me and followed me for 2-3 blocks(I was 17 at the time mind you). I honestly thought i was going to have to run up to someone and ask them to call the cops! Anyway I don't think there is anything you can do about that because creppy men will be well creppy men..but what I sometimes do is make sure the volume on my mp3 is loud enough to block out any unwanted cat calls..maybe that'll work for you.

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Okay.

Every day i get some weird creepy men hitting on me. It used to be flattering but now it's actually annoying. I mean today this one guy was following me all over the city. I kid you not. I got onto one train, he followed me. I moved to one side he moved right along. He sat right next to me and i felt like throwing a book at him. He was staring hardcore at me for a good 2 minutes. I felt so uncomfortable. I wanted to get up but i was afraid he'd grab me or something weird like that. (We were alone on the train) He then decided to finally ask me "Hey what's your number? what's your name?" I of course lied and said "Amanda.. and no" "you got a home phone?" "No."

 

Wanna know what my response would of been if he asked for my phone? "Uh yea I do. Lemme call the cops now since you're stalking me." Make sure you have enough witnesses too.

 

That's called stalking and that's illegal.

 

Also... don't give people attention. Act like they don't exist and if they continue, find a cop/security. Never travel alone.

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Wanna know what my response would of been if he asked for my phone? "Uh yea I do. Lemme call the cops now since you're stalking me." Make sure you have enough witnesses too.

 

That's called stalking and that's illegal.

 

Also... don't give people attention. Act like they don't exist and if they continue, find a cop/security. Never travel alone.

 

That IS funny! I will remember that

 

Thats what i was afraid of. We were alone.. There was maybe 2 people on the train but they were way far from us. I was scared that If i got him he would like follow me and grab me or something. So i sat down until I had to get off my stop...

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wow what a shame =( That reminds me when this 30 something year old looking guy try to hit on me and followed me for 2-3 blocks(I was 17 at the time mind you). I honestly thought i was going to have to run up to someone and ask them to call the cops! Anyway I don't think there is anything you can do about that because creppy men will be well creppy men..but what I sometimes do is make sure the volume on my mp3 is loud enough to block out any unwanted cat calls..maybe that'll work for you.

This started ever since I was 16.. This guy around my block is constantly whistling at me. Calling me "sweet cakes" "smile baby" what the heck?

I even had a guy go as far as to harass my friends so that they would tell him who I was. Like come on. EW! I AM 16?!?!?!?! - at the time I thought -

now it seems to be getting worse.

I get stared at and hit on hardcore by guys Im not interested in

while guys that I am interested in just stare and never approach me cause of nervousness.

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So, glucoze, you must be really hot, hum?

 

Seriously, I'm really sorry you're going through this. You seem like a really nice person. And sometimes, I've noted that really nice women tend to attract creeps. Why? Because they seem friendly and approachable. I don't think it's a workable solution to walk around with a disinterested scowl on you face whenever you're in public. But as the other posters have mentioned, sometimes I've noted that nice women are not firm enough with creeps.

 

Example: I've had women friends that have been asked out by some guy they are totally not interested in, and rather than firmly saying "no thank you, I'm not interested," they try to be nice about it and say "no, I'm busy Friday, sorry." Of course, the retort is "What about Saturday? What about Sunday? What about Monday?" etc. Then, days later, they are surprised that the guy won't leave them alone.

 

Standing up for yourself and standing firm with what you want will change your demeanor (or aura, if you're into that) to one that is more confident. People can sense this in others. Creeps can too. Try being REALLY firm the next time it happens. Taking that step might also change your level of harassment in the future.

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Yeah you are right! Maybe I am too nice...

Thing is I think about if i say "yeah no i am not interested." Because when i get like that.. i am * * * * * y. Seriously * * * * * y. And I am afraid if they will attack me or something LOLL... or totally unload their frustration and anger out on me. I mean the last time i actually gave a creep my number - only because my friends pressured me to just take it - he would NOT STOP Calling me. Kept texting me. I ignored, and finally by the third day he stopped lol.

 

What if standing up for myself = them attacking me LOL.

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What do you wear? If you're wearing stuff that is designed to attract attention then it will do that - especially if you're already attractive... I am not saying you need to change your entire wardrobe or dress like a monk but just give it some thought to wear something more modest if you're going to be traveling in public for a few hours (Eg. jeans vs short shorts) ... if in fact you do dress this way of course. It couldn't hurt?

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I think the super weird creepy guys have no boundaries and hit on lots of women. You just find yourself in the crossfire more often. I have the same problem and I'm willing to bet that I'm not as hot and young as you.

 

Someday no one will hit on us. And I suspect that will suck slightly more than being annoyed by the ubercreepsters. Until then, carry your head high and carry some mace.

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What do you wear? If you're wearing stuff that is designed to attract attention then it will do that - especially if you're already attractive... I am not saying you need to change your entire wardrobe or dress like a monk but just give it some thought to wear something more modest if you're going to be traveling in public for a few hours (Eg. jeans vs short shorts) ... if in fact you do dress this way of course. It couldn't hurt?

 

I doubt it has anything to do with the way she dresses. These guys can actually be more creepy if they think you look wholesome, like the girl next door.

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What do you wear? If you're wearing stuff that is designed to attract attention then it will do that - especially if you're already attractive... I am not saying you need to change your entire wardrobe or dress like a monk but just give it some thought to wear something more modest if you're going to be traveling in public for a few hours (Eg. jeans vs short shorts) ... if in fact you do dress this way of course. It couldn't hurt?

 

I dress in whatever i feel comfortable/ according to the weather

Heck sometimes i wake up and i am wearing boy friend jeans and some random tshirt and i get some guy winking or smiling at me...

so i dont know. I obviously don't walk out my house showing my boobs to the world lol I have self-respect

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I would sugest that you try to keep a personal strength about you, when you speak speak firmly as though your word is final. Dont be aggressive dont be smart or sarcastic as this may provoke a more violent or pursuasive attitude from the people approching you. But most of these creeps are looking for girls that are a little vunerable, maybe the shy polite people that they can manipulate with words because they are to scared to offend anyone.

 

I would sugest that when in public places try to find places with more people that way you always have security around you. In the circumstances in which they are following you in the streets try to position yourself so that they cant keep stalking you without making it odvious and hopfuly they will go away, if not you can go into a store and speak to a security guard they are usualy more than willing to help people in your situation.

 

Learning some form of self defence is also advisable as you wont feel so vunerable on your own. Sorry to waffle on so much hope this helps some

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I would sugest it, its a great way to improve self confidence, and even if you never have to use it you will feel a lot more relaxed in these situations.

 

Your best hope in this situation though is to take controle of it, for now you will feel most relaxed when you know you can deal with these people. The headphone sugestion is a good one but I sugest not having music to loud as it blocks your ability to hear danger.

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"And why is it the guys I AM interested in all act so timid and shy. Just stare, but guys i don't care for approach me with perverted pick up lines?"

 

Im sorta the same.And Ive asked the same question and the feedbacks I've got are too hot and intimidates decent guys but creeps have no boundary.Or Im not hot and hot guys dont want me only creeps are in my league.

But from ur other posts I sense U'll hate the second one so I'll go the first are too hot. lol alright that's probably mean but seriously that's the only two answers I have.

As far as the stalkers,I dont have good advice myself either.I usually just ignore or I dont go out alone.

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From what I understand, these creeps are 'players', and they typically do this to all women.

 

As an average looking guy, I can't say that I've experienced the level of discomfort that you have. Although I suppose it's different for men. If a hot girl was calling me 'hey handsome', and then drove off, I would be like, "Wait, come back!"

 

Creepy men also don't have the self respect that decent guys have. However, since decent guys have been turned down for being 'too nice,' they're usually too insecure to approach women.

 

So you have a choice...go with the creepy guys who have the balls to approach you, or find a nice, shy guy and go after HIM.

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From what I understand, these creeps are 'players', and they typically do this to all women.

 

As an average looking guy, I can't say that I've experienced the level of discomfort that you have. Although I suppose it's different for men. If a hot girl was calling me 'hey handsome', and then drove off, I would be like, "Wait, come back!"

 

Creepy men also don't have the self respect that decent guys have. However, since decent guys have been turned down for being 'too nice,' they're usually too insecure to approach women.

 

So you have a choice...go with the creepy guys who have the balls to approach you, or find a nice, shy guy and go after HIM.

 

lol, no, creeps are not necessarily players, they are actually more of the desperate type. I think the biggest difference is that 'creeps' are usually unattractive, that might be one reason that they get called creepy in the first place. I have noticed that I even do it myself...if an attractive guy makes lots of eye contact with me, I feel flattered and might find him nice/friendly and want to get to know him. If an unattractive guy does that, I feel like he is creepy. I know it's not fair, but it's the way most people are.

 

There are however some creepy behaviors that freak girls out, regardless of the attractiveness of the person who does them. Stalking someone in the streets is one of those behaviors.

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lol, no, creeps are not necessarily players, they are actually more of the desperate type. I think the biggest difference is that 'creeps' are usually unattractive, that might be one reason that they get called creepy in the first place. I have noticed that I even do it myself...if an attractive guy makes lots of eye contact with me, I feel flattered and might find him nice/friendly and want to get to know him. If an unattractive guy does that, I feel like he is creepy. I know it's not fair, but it's the way most people are.

 

There are however some creepy behaviors that freak girls out, regardless of the attractiveness of the person who does them. Stalking someone in the streets is one of those behaviors.

 

It's good that you can admit it.

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From what I understand, these creeps are 'players', and they typically do this to all women.

 

As an average looking guy, I can't say that I've experienced the level of discomfort that you have. Although I suppose it's different for men. If a hot girl was calling me 'hey handsome', and then drove off, I would be like, "Wait, come back!"

 

Creepy men also don't have the self respect that decent guys have. However, since decent guys have been turned down for being 'too nice,' they're usually too insecure to approach women.

 

So you have a choice...go with the creepy guys who have the balls to approach you, or find a nice, shy guy and go after HIM.

 

I would rather much prefer your second option.

in fact I seen a very cute guy that day, we were having a staring contest. He looked very shy. I did not go over to say hi to him because my friend was with me and I didn't want it to be awkward. But I did smile at him which made him fidget a lot in his seat but he kept his eyes on mine. He got up and looked like he wanted to sit next to me bit decided against it. I kept the smiling going and he smiled back, we continued to stare at each other but he made it more obvious.

Oh I will probably be seeing him again...

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lol, no, creeps are not necessarily players, they are actually more of the desperate type. I think the biggest difference is that 'creeps' are usually unattractive, that might be one reason that they get called creepy in the first place. I have noticed that I even do it myself...if an attractive guy makes lots of eye contact with me, I feel flattered and might find him nice/friendly and want to get to know him. If an unattractive guy does that, I feel like he is creepy. I know it's not fair, but it's the way most people are.

 

There are however some creepy behaviors that freak girls out, regardless of the attractiveness of the person who does them. Stalking someone in the streets is one of those behaviors.

 

 

She speaks the truth. His desperation and unattractiveness makes him the definition of creepy lol. If an attractive guy came up to me and asked me for my number and harassed me I still wouldn't give him my number.

If an attractive guy was making serious eye contact with me.. Like lingering looks than I'd think it's cute, that he's obviously interested, and I'd most likely go up and say hello or smile and wave slightly. Depends if I have a friend or two around. I mean what are the body language of men that are interested? They are open, leaning towards you, constantly looking, etc. that's my "ok yup he's interested" response and I'd act.

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She speaks the truth. His desperation and unattractiveness makes him the definition of creepy lol. If an attractive guy came up to me and asked me for my number and harassed me I still wouldn't give him my number.

If an attractive guy was making serious eye contact with me.. Like lingering looks than I'd think it's cute, that he's obviously interested, and I'd most likely go up and say hello or smile and wave slightly. Depends if I have a friend or two around. I mean what are the body language of men that are interested? They are open, leaning towards you, constantly looking, etc. that's my "ok yup he's interested" response and I'd act.

 

So low self esteem makes someone creepy?

 

I always thought creepy was stalking someone, making inappropriate comments, etc. If someone doesn't make eye contact, maybe he's shy? Doesn't mean he's creepy.

 

And unattractive = creepy...way to stereotype. This is why us unattractive guys don't hit on women, because we don't want to be seen as creepy.

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When a man can't look me in the eye I always wonder why. It makes him seem conflicted about talking to me.

 

Maybe he has social anxiety?

 

I know that, personally, I get so nervous around attractive girls that I don't make eye contact. However, I'll be holding a crush on said girl (that never turns into anything, because I never talk to her.)

 

Women don't understand the hell that us shy guys have to go through. We have sweaty palms, we get panic attacks, and we physically shake and tremble at the idea of talking to that pretty girl we're crushing on. And then, we go through hell, because we were too shy to ask her out, and so some other guy (who's NOT shy) asks her out, and we have to watch them kiss and hold hands and basically stamp all over our hearts. And then we have to get over our crush, move on...at least until we see another pretty girl, and then the cycle repeats.

 

](*,)

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