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Thread: How can I stop attracting weird creepy men?

  1. #1
    glucoze
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    How can I stop attracting weird creepy men?

    Okay.
    Every day i get some weird creepy men hitting on me. It used to be flattering but now it's actually annoying. I mean today this one guy was following me all over the city. I kid you not. I got onto one train, he followed me. I moved to one side he moved right along. He sat right next to me and i felt like throwing a book at him. He was staring hardcore at me for a good 2 minutes. I felt so uncomfortable. I wanted to get up but i was afraid he'd grab me or something weird like that. (We were alone on the train) He then decided to finally ask me "Hey what's your number? what's your name?" I of course lied and said "Amanda.. and no" "you got a home phone?" "No." "You don't have a phone?" "no." He would NOT leave me alone. Question after question. After the third question i ignored him. I got really uncomfortable, and he kept saying how hot i was i thought this was very inappropriate. You don't follow me and harass me like come on.
    And then something out of no where happened... i was downtown walking and I got offered a modeling gig. This woman and this photographer ambushed me. Really random. It didn't end there, aNOTHER guy was following me. They followed me into numerous stores into the mall. I got frustrated and left. i decided maybe they wouldn't follow me into the street, into the icecream shop.. wrong.

    Ugh i am so annoyed! I don't want that kind of attention.
    How on earth can I get these guys to back off? I'm not interested. I mean if a decent guy will come up to me and be NICE not perverted than of course i'll give you my number. But it's clear all these guys that come up to me just want sex.. and for my looks.
    What? DO i have to give them the finger? Like what do i have to do to stop attracting this creepy guys..

    And why is it the guys I AM interested in all act so timid and shy. Just stare, but guys i don't care for approach me with perverted pick up lines?
    :/
    Last edited by glucoze; 05-05-2010 at 06:35 PM.

  2. #2
    xShannyx
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    wow what a shame =( That reminds me when this 30 something year old looking guy try to hit on me and followed me for 2-3 blocks(I was 17 at the time mind you). I honestly thought i was going to have to run up to someone and ask them to call the cops! Anyway I don't think there is anything you can do about that because creppy men will be well creppy men..but what I sometimes do is make sure the volume on my mp3 is loud enough to block out any unwanted cat calls..maybe that'll work for you.

  3. #3
    Kumatora
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    Quote Originally Posted by glucoze [Register to see the link]
    Okay.
    Every day i get some weird creepy men hitting on me. It used to be flattering but now it's actually annoying. I mean today this one guy was following me all over the city. I kid you not. I got onto one train, he followed me. I moved to one side he moved right along. He sat right next to me and i felt like throwing a book at him. He was staring hardcore at me for a good 2 minutes. I felt so uncomfortable. I wanted to get up but i was afraid he'd grab me or something weird like that. (We were alone on the train) He then decided to finally ask me "Hey what's your number? what's your name?" I of course lied and said "Amanda.. and no" "you got a home phone?" "No."
    Wanna know what my response would of been if he asked for my phone? "Uh yea I do. Lemme call the cops now since you're stalking me." Make sure you have enough witnesses too.

    That's called stalking and that's illegal.

    Also... don't give people attention. Act like they don't exist and if they continue, find a cop/security. Never travel alone.

  4. #4
    glucoze
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kumatora [Register to see the link]
    Wanna know what my response would of been if he asked for my phone? "Uh yea I do. Lemme call the cops now since you're stalking me." Make sure you have enough witnesses too.

    That's called stalking and that's illegal.

    Also... don't give people attention. Act like they don't exist and if they continue, find a cop/security. Never travel alone.
    That IS funny! I will remember that .

    Thats what i was afraid of. We were alone.. There was maybe 2 people on the train but they were way far from us. I was scared that If i got him he would like follow me and grab me or something. So i sat down until I had to get off my stop...

  5. #5
    glucoze
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    Quote Originally Posted by xShannyx [Register to see the link]
    wow what a shame =( That reminds me when this 30 something year old looking guy try to hit on me and followed me for 2-3 blocks(I was 17 at the time mind you). I honestly thought i was going to have to run up to someone and ask them to call the cops! Anyway I don't think there is anything you can do about that because creppy men will be well creppy men..but what I sometimes do is make sure the volume on my mp3 is loud enough to block out any unwanted cat calls..maybe that'll work for you.
    This started ever since I was 16.. This guy around my block is constantly whistling at me. Calling me "sweet cakes" "smile baby" what the heck?
    I even had a guy go as far as to harass my friends so that they would tell him who I was. Like come on. EW! I AM 16?!?!?!?! - at the time I thought -
    now it seems to be getting worse.
    I get stared at and hit on hardcore by guys Im not interested in
    while guys that I am interested in just stare and never approach me cause of nervousness.

  6. #6
    oldenoughtoknow
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    So, glucoze, you must be really hot, hum?

    Seriously, I'm really sorry you're going through this. You seem like a really nice person. And sometimes, I've noted that really nice women tend to attract creeps. Why? Because they seem friendly and approachable. I don't think it's a workable solution to walk around with a disinterested scowl on you face whenever you're in public. But as the other posters have mentioned, sometimes I've noted that nice women are not firm enough with creeps.

    Example: I've had women friends that have been asked out by some guy they are totally not interested in, and rather than firmly saying "no thank you, I'm not interested," they try to be nice about it and say "no, I'm busy Friday, sorry." Of course, the retort is "What about Saturday? What about Sunday? What about Monday?" etc. Then, days later, they are surprised that the guy won't leave them alone.

    Standing up for yourself and standing firm with what you want will change your demeanor (or aura, if you're into that) to one that is more confident. People can sense this in others. Creeps can too. Try being REALLY firm the next time it happens. Taking that step might also change your level of harassment in the future.

  7. #7
    glucoze
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    Yeah you are right! Maybe I am too nice...
    Thing is I think about if i say "yeah no i am not interested." Because when i get like that.. i am * * * * * y. Seriously * * * * * y. And I am afraid if they will attack me or something LOLL... or totally unload their frustration and anger out on me. I mean the last time i actually gave a creep my number - only because my friends pressured me to just take it - he would NOT STOP Calling me. Kept texting me. I ignored, and finally by the third day he stopped lol.

    What if standing up for myself = them attacking me LOL.

  8. #8
    Momake
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    What do you wear? If you're wearing stuff that is designed to attract attention then it will do that - especially if you're already attractive... I am not saying you need to change your entire wardrobe or dress like a monk but just give it some thought to wear something more modest if you're going to be traveling in public for a few hours (Eg. jeans vs short shorts) ... if in fact you do dress this way of course. It couldn't hurt?

  9. #9
    Mauxly
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    I think the super weird creepy guys have no boundaries and hit on lots of women. You just find yourself in the crossfire more often. I have the same problem and I'm willing to bet that I'm not as hot and young as you.

    Someday no one will hit on us. And I suspect that will suck slightly more than being annoyed by the ubercreepsters. Until then, carry your head high and carry some mace.

  10. #10
    Mauxly
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    Quote Originally Posted by Momake [Register to see the link]
    What do you wear? If you're wearing stuff that is designed to attract attention then it will do that - especially if you're already attractive... I am not saying you need to change your entire wardrobe or dress like a monk but just give it some thought to wear something more modest if you're going to be traveling in public for a few hours (Eg. jeans vs short shorts) ... if in fact you do dress this way of course. It couldn't hurt?
    I doubt it has anything to do with the way she dresses. These guys can actually be more creepy if they think you look wholesome, like the girl next door.

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