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Thread: Men that hate going down on women

  1. #1
    newwave

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    Men that hate going down on women

    Ok, there's something else about the guy I like that is a red flag: he hates going down on a woman. He told me he tried it once, and couldn't do it because it made him sick. He said months ago he MIGHT try it again but not likely because he thought it was gross and disgusting. I was disappointed at the time but we weren't at that point so I figured he might change. However, now it doesn't look like I'll end up with him so I am looking again. How do I bring this up without looking like I want sex then? I love oral (giving and receiving) and would hate to end up with someone who absolutely refuses to consider this.

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    Celestialagape54

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    First time I have heard of that happening...

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    annie24
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    i dated a guy who wasn't into going down. actually, he admitted to me he was bisexual and had more sex with men than women. every other guy i've dated - couldn't get them out of there!!!!

    how to bring it up? i've noticed i've never had to bring it up. they just go and dive right in!

  4. #4
    newwave

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    Quote Originally Posted by lunarstar0131 [Register to see the link]
    First time I have heard of that happening...
    Me too. I've dated a lot and this is the first time this came up. A few guys weren't into it, but did it because I enjoyed it. Others enjoyed it, and others would only do it if we had showered first (reasonable).

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    FathomFear
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    It's possible. I had a roommate at university who told me that one of his ex-girlfriends had an extreme revoltion to oral sex--both giving and receiving. It literally made her vomit. She had no problems with intercourse but was disgusted by the ideal of oral contact with genitals. My roommate ended up breaking up with her for other reasons, but he told me that it was a definite strain on the relationship sometimes.

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    Cognitive_Canine
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    I'd probably resent them not reciprocating me giving them blowjobs. And, I couldn't be in a relationship where blowjobs aren't a big part of the foreplay. So, I'd probably let this one go if he wasn't willing to work on it.

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    greywolf
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    TBH, I probably couldn't put up with that. The first couple of times I went down on a girl, I honestly didn't enjoy it that much. I was turned off by all the slime lol. But once I got used to it, I loved doing it.

  8. #8
    Amore
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    I wish I had some advice, but all I can do is sympathize. A few months into into my relationship, my boyfriend admitted that he hates giving oral and finds it disgusting. I thought eventually he would warm up to the idea as we got more comfortable with each other - especially since I was giving but not receiving. After a year of giving countless blow jobs and never once getting oral, despite having talks about it, I just stopped giving. I got too resentful of the fact.

    I'm still resentful of it, even though I've accepted that things will never change. I actually ENJOY giving blow jobs and I wish my sex life contained any sort of oral pleasure. *sigh*

    [/end rant]

  9. #9
    newwave

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    I don't think this relationship will work out anyway, at least at this level because of other things (namely he doesn't want a relationship now and who knows if he will). I guess I am a little afraid that the next guy (if there's a next guy) will be the same way.

    Speaking of guys who live to receive but not give, I had a previous boyfriend the same way. He hated going down on me but expected it from me. I ended up dumping him because of that. If I am going to do it for him I expect it in return. I actually like oral better than regular sex.

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    OptomisticGirl
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    My ex boyfriend pulled the 'I don't like it' so I was like okay fine, I can understand that. But if I'm not getting it neither are you. His tone changed quickly within a week....

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