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Thread: Being flat-chested and dating

  1. #1
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    Being flat-chested and dating

    So...I am single again after two years. I am not quite ready to start dating, but I am thinking of trying the online thing in about 2 months or so...

    Here is my problem. I have NO breasts. I am not talking about small breasts, I mean NONE...I am a 34AA.

    I do not wish to get implants because breast cancer runs in my family. After losing my grandmother and aunt to this terrible disease, I would both feel like a hypocrite for having an expensive surgery to deal with a cosmetic problem, and I don't want to decrease my risk of early detection.

    Honestly, I am a pretty confident person, so it doesn't me that much, except when I am dating someone new. I have not been with many men, but the few that have seen me naked often display a shocked look the first time. I never know if I should tell them in advance, wait til they realize how flat I am?

    I know it could be a dealbreaker to some men. I want to weed them out before they get as far as seeing me naked. What should I do?

  2. #2

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    Do you make a habit of wearing gel bras or other boosting-effect clothing to hide your flat-chestedness?

  3. #3
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    It kind of depends on what I am wearing. It is hard to wear any cute tops without adding some kind of structure in that area. Even with some padding though, I don't exactly look busty. If a guy were really into big boobs, he could tell that I was not for him. It seems that guys are still surprised though when I take my shirt off though, I think they don't expect me to be as flat as I am.

    I just hate having to go through this again. I have NOT totally ruled out implants I guess. I may talk to my doctor and do some more research on the risks involved.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Daligal83's Avatar
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    I'm the same size you are. They don't even carry bras small enough for me at specialty stores. I've never felt like guys were shocked when they saw me though. If they were they never said anything. And honestly, if he is and it matters, then we aren't right for each other. Try not to let it get to you. It's something that's out of your control. And it can weed out the jerks who aren't with you for who you are.

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  6. #5
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    Some men will take you as you are. Find one of them!

    I know that's easy to say, but there will always be someone attracted to you.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member anggrace's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by monkeysblood
    Some men will take you as you are. Find one of them!

    I know that's easy to say, but there will always be someone attracted to you.
    I agree with this! Don't disguise them. Find someone who is attracted to you the way you are.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member oldenoughtoknow's Avatar
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    Exactly. I've never been attracted to any one particular part of the female body. It's more of an over all thing, including your hair, your voice, how you move and smell, etc. Attraction is a multifaceted thing. So you won't bag any breast men. So what? You also might be too fat, too thin, too short, too tall, too smart, too dumb, too loud, too quiet, shall I go on? Not all men are breast men. In fact, most of the men I know prefer to go out with someone who fits the definition of being "attractive" and someone they really get along with. They never mention breast size. There's far more to the woman that a man wants to spend the rest of his life with than the size of her chest. Don't sell yourself short.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
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    I also wouldn't use enhancement when dating. I am the same size you are, and I never did the padded bra thing. Take it or leave it was always my view. There are a lot of men that wouldn't want it, but there are just as many that could care less.

  10. #9
    Silver Member UserLain's Avatar
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    If it helps any I'll go on record as someone who -likes- "flat-chested" women, I have all my life. Maybe cuz I grew up in the alt-rock scene with a lot of skinny girls with no breasts. But I didn't care, I preferred it. They had nice eyes, cool style. That's way better than large breasts. It was only until a couple years ago that I actually started liking larger ones too. I still like small ones as much as I always did. I can tell you tho, as a man, when I'm looking for a girlfriend the last criteria that comes to mind are the size of her breasts. So I hope that puts you at ease at least a little bit.

  11. #10
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    if you find that it matters give the guy a cataloge to find what he wants
    if the man love you breast wouldnt be important. as far as implants. im a man and i can see the plastic and do not like them never felt any and my ex was small. it is in the heart that make the difference, at least to me. god bless you for you.

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