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Thread: Dealing with a very depressed, negative, and emotionally needy... mother.

  1. #1
    coldplay.
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    Dealing with a very depressed, negative, and emotionally needy... mother.

    I just cant deal with it anymore, and it really hurts me deep inside about this.

    My mother is slow, she if functional, but has learning disabilities, graduated highschool god bless her but doesnt have a fully working mind. Unfortunetly she also has clinical depression and its bad....


    These two facts together just put her in immense pain, and she cant see that what shes doing is causing her this pain. Her and my father got a divorce, she cheated on him for whatever reason. So they naturally got a divorce. This ended her life as i knew her, multiple attempts of suicide, institutionalized several times. All while i was in college and just couldnt deal with it. So shes finally out of that, now heavily medicated... and just making the worst decisions. Spending obscene amounts of money on the stupidest things. Living in a terrible relationship with a man, just because she doesnt want to be alone.

    And all this time, she looks at me as like the last link to my dad, which she just cannot get over, she blames herself, and just is self hating. So she like cherishes me... im the only source of her happiness, but she is never happy. She just talks about depressing stuff, cryptic crap like making sure im the benefactor on the will, about her dieing, about how she messed up. It just never ends... So it just turns into this miserable experience with her all the time...

    My issue is i cant be around people like that... I have my own problems to deal with, she just puts me in the worst emotional state... she just sucks all the positive out of life. And the fact that im her sole source of happiness bothers me even worse.. Then all my actions directly effect her wellbeing, she doesnt find happiness from within herself, but from an outside source. Im really big into self help... ive tried to console her, but she just refuses anything except her own false reality... I cant deal with it.

    So i decided that i cant travel with her on holidays anymore... thanksgiving i sat in a pile of her vomit from her last nights binge drinking, while we picked up some random freaky dude in god knows where, to go to my sisters, a 2 hours ride.... that took 4 hours... I wish i could just talk to her, or slap her so hard she stops all the crap... but i know it will never happen. How can i deal with someone like this, i mean i love her sure, but just wow.

  2. #2
    EternalSingle
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    I am sorry to hear that man. At some point in time blood begins to mean nothing and you have to live for yourself. Live your life and stop worrying abour her. You owe it to yourself.

  3. #3
    lyzhysco

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    Hello

    Out of the many posts, this one attract my attention. I believe it is possible for anyone to participate.

  4. #4
    coldplay.
    Gold Member coldplay.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lyzhysco [Register to see the link]
    Out of the many posts, this one attract my attention. I believe it is possible for anyone to participate.
    participate in what manner?

    Im genuinely asking how i can help my mother, because i dont know how to.

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