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Thread: Just found out my BF is in to men and tranny - PLEASE HELP!!!

  1. #31
    Bronze Member bambina maxima's Avatar
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    Hey guys, thought I'd jump in here because everyone seems to be convinced he is gay.

    If you talk to GLBT people, read Dan Savage, etc, you will know this is just not true. You can be straight and be into trannies. I think actually that most gay guys are not into trannies at all--the majority of people who are "into" trannies are straight men.

    I'm not saying that this applies to this person in particular, since he also seems to be into men. But don't be so quick to judge--just because he finds women with penises attractive, does NOT make him gay.

  2. #32
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    hi muffinhead you had a post some time back about your bf is in to trans women and you asked why...and now hes off doing what he wants.... that was the day you should have let him go lets face it men will tell you just what they want you just have to lesson and when you feel that thing in you guy its real lesson to it...and just so you know i am a trans women and have been for 13 years on hormones and all that what i know for sure is men like us because we trans women spend a lot of time being fem in a lot of cases more so then real women and men just love that let alone we have a lot in common with men more so then real women we have a big sex drive and on like a lot of real women we love anal sex .i have found most men like anal sex more then reg sex witch is why so so so many married men find us and there are a lot of them.and i am no way saying its right at all i think it sucks i feel bad for you but you have to let go and the next time you have that Little feeling go with it ..with all my heart i wish you the best
    ;

  3. #33
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    This would be an absolute dealbreaker. He should have said this much earlier so you wouldn't have such an emotional investment. He was counting on you loving him "too much" to break it off with him if he waited. Don't give him that pleasure.

  4. #34
    Platinum Member lavenderdove's Avatar
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    People, this thread is 4 years old... OP is long gone.

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  6. #35
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    Originally Posted by lavenderdove
    People, this thread is 4 years old... OP is long gone.
    Yeah.. And from the OP's last ENA posts she stayed with him.

  7. #36
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    Posts should archive after a year. They should still exist but be more difficult to stumble onto.

  8. #37

    Just sharing

    Hi there. I found out in january this year that my husband cheated on me a year ago with a transgender person. It happened when we had an intense period of fighting. Since i found out i have been in exactly the same emotional state as you are. I love him. He loves me. He is just into transgender women. Ive been trying to think of them as actually men, but they look way better than me, haha. So yes, im crushed. My self worth is down the gutter. My insecurities are on a all time high. Ive distinguished it into 2 thing, the liking of transgender women which i can actually deal with and the actual cheating. I am hurt by the latter more than the former. I am trying to deal with the creeping suspicions that it is happening, will happen again and this is a painful vicious cycle. Since then, he and i have gone to see a transgender person just for me to understand what it is like. Weve been in foursomes. I have enjoyed it. Our intimacy has gotten to a whole new level and then when the suspicion creeps in for whatever reason (this time it was me seeing irregular texts), it all comes tumbling down. When you go down this road, you need to be strong and clear and keep working on yourself because that's who you can work on. Happy to connect and chat whenever. Im trying to find material on how to deal with this too. Good luck. <3

  9. #38
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    ==old thread---

  10. #39
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    I feel so sorry for you because I have had the same experience. I went to a Bisexual Site and behold, my boyfriend was on it looking for hookups with men... anal, oral, swallowing. I was hurt, horrified and disgusted. He lied to me by not telling me this at the beginning of our relationship. I checked his phone before I confronted him and there were plenty of pictures verifying he liked penis and anal. At first I became afraid that I might have HIV/AIDS since bisexuals spread same to hetero wives/girlfriends. He then told me that he doesn't use protection which gave me a sick feeling in my stomach. He said he's been attracted to men for sex only since a boy... however he loves sex with women and love relationships with women. Nothing makes sense. I loved him and we broke up, got back together, however nothing ever was the same. At this point we do things together because we are really best friends but our sex life is horrible. I do not want to kiss his mouth or come hear his private areas... the visual of men with him makes me sick. Not sure what to do. Any sex we have is protected. Not sure at this point where our relationship will be going.

  11. #40
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    Originally Posted by GirleyGirl
    I feel so sorry for you because I have had the same experience. I went to a Bisexual Site and behold, my boyfriend was on it looking for hookups with men... anal, oral, swallowing. I was hurt, horrified and disgusted. He lied to me by not telling me this at the beginning of our relationship. I checked his phone before I confronted him and there were plenty of pictures verifying he liked penis and anal. At first I became afraid that I might have HIV/AIDS since bisexuals spread same to hetero wives/girlfriends. He then told me that he doesn't use protection which gave me a sick feeling in my stomach. He said he's been attracted to men for sex only since a boy... however he loves sex with women and love relationships with women. Nothing makes sense. I loved him and we broke up, got back together, however nothing ever was the same. At this point we do things together because we are really best friends but our sex life is horrible. I do not want to kiss his mouth or come hear his private areas... the visual of men with him makes me sick. Not sure what to do. Any sex we have is protected. Not sure at this point where our relationship will be going.
    The last two threads you responded to are 10 years old and 2 years old. It would be a better idea to start your own thread.

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