Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: doing all the work in our relationship

  1. #1
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    South Africa
    Posts
    134
    Gender
    Female

    doing all the work in our relationship

    Please help me! me an my bf have been going out for 7 months now and i do all the work in our relationship! like when we have a fight i go to him and say sorry even if he said hurtfull things to me. i have to ask him if i can go along when he works and i ask him if i can see him! i hate doing all the work but i have no idea how to stop! i get frustrated sometimes and then just stop calling him or asking him if i can see him but sometimes if i don't do this then nothing happens. there are other times that he calls out of his own but this doesn't happen alot! what do i do! please help anyone!

  2. #2
    Bronze Member vaporleak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Northeast
    Age
    36
    Posts
    269
    Gender
    Female
    I've personally been in your shoes before and the relationship inevitably ended up not working out. If you are truly looking for a long term relationship, then his laziness, or lack of effort will drive you insane. This will lead you to the two of you fighting all the time and at that point it won't work out. Tell him exactly how you feel, and if he still doesn't seem to acknowledge your effort or emotions, I would flat out walk away... it's only been 7 months, you don't want to waste years.

  3. #3
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    South Africa
    Posts
    134
    Gender
    Female
    So you think i should tell him that i feel i'm doing all the work? i guess i can do that. i just actually want him to start doing some of the work on his own you know without me feeding it to him like a baby!

  4. #4
    Platinum Member quirky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    4,990
    Gender
    Female
    You could speak to him but he already knows deep down what he's doing. I would just back off a little, tone it down, don't do much, see how he acts. Why would you apologise if he's the one in the wrong? That gives off a vibe that you're desperate for his approval..No need to please him all the time, most of the time it backfires.

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member riley123's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    1,233
    Gender
    Male
    Can I ask how old you are? And how old he is? Has he ever been in a relationship before?

  7. #6
    Bronze Member vaporleak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Northeast
    Age
    36
    Posts
    269
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Scarlet 1
    So you think i should tell him that i feel i'm doing all the work? i guess i can do that. i just actually want him to start doing some of the work on his own you know without me feeding it to him like a baby!

    Unless you tell a guy what you want, he will Never know how you feel. It sounds like he may have zero clue how you feel, if that is the case, talking to him may do wonders.

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •