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Thread: 'That Gap' at weddings

  1. #1
    Platinum Member d24's Avatar
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    'That Gap' at weddings

    I've only been to maybe 6 weddings but there's always been a large-ish 'gap' where people mill around not doing very much. We went to a wedding very recently where there was actually a 6hr gap of 'entertain yourself' which was really dull... I know you expect to wait around doing not a lot at any wedding, it's kinda unavoidable - but I'd like people to enjoy themselves at these times if possible (at my wedding).

    General idea is : 1pm wedding, 2:30pm sit down meal & speeches, 7pm evening starts.

    so we're probably looking at 4pm-7pm ish that needs 'filling'

    I'm not bothered myself as I'll be consummating the marriage hahaha.... I just don't want our 100ish guests bored in a hotel bar or something for 3hrs before another 60 or so arrive for the evening do!

    Any ideas?
    Last edited by d24; 08-17-2009 at 07:40 AM.

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    Platinum Member top bloke's Avatar
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    music...a band...to entertain....

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    Platinum Member d24's Avatar
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    we have a DJ at 7 for the night do.... you mean another band, or maybe the DJ setting up early so people have some music to listen to? Could do... but then again all bars have music in the background anyway.

    I was thinking more of a 'doing' thing? Maybe something indoorsy in case of bad weather (cos i had initially thought a bouncy castle could have been fun for the kids, and maybe bowls or some lawn games for the adults... but the chances of it not raining are pretty low for our venue/time/date, and i dont want to have plans ruined you know?)

  4. #4

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    Well, while your consumating your marriage. Have your Bridesmaid be the "host" during the fill time. You could do a lot of things for your guest... But of course, you'll be busy, so someone else will need to kind of "take charge" and encourage people to stay up beat.

    What's the theme of your wedding? Cause you could always throw theme events...

    Example: Hawallian, Loula Dancing, Limbo, Bonfire(s)...

    Some more food for though would be to offer beer/wine and let everyone have a "relaxing" area -if they so choose, a nice snack bar...

    Could also have the bridesmaid run around and make a "video" for the two of you. Where everyone can comment on your both and tell them what they think about your marriage and the day. Those are always fun to look back on...

    Of course, having adult entertainment would be cool. -But also the bouncy castle idea would be a good idea for children.

    Pretty much what I would do, is write down a basic list of things you even see at a "party" and try and add a little bit of everything so everyone has a chance to have fun.

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    Why not have the wedding later in the day, so that you can go right from the ceremony to a sit-down dinner (instead of a late lunch) to the evening festivities? I've never been to any weddings that had as huge a "gap" as you're describing.

    If there's too big a gap, you will lose a LOT of people before the evening portion ever starts. Also, your schedule seems to require that you feed your guests twice, since you can't give people a lunch at 2:30 p.m. and expect them not to get hungry again if you're going to have music, etc., from 7 p.m. until whenever...10? 11? 12? Which means a lot of extra expense for a second meal.

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    Platinum Member d24's Avatar
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    yeah unfortunately the service is a uk civil ceremony and has to be booked 12months in advance (unless cancellations). So the time of the wedding is pretty non-negotiable. The sit-down meal is for everyone at the service itself and everything is at the same venue (a country house with all the rooms reserved for the wedding party).

    everyone will have their room there to retire after the meal if they want, but i want there to be something to keep them entertained and you know, a little more 'mingley'. i suppose we could start the evening do at 4ish but i'm not sure... and yes the guests will get a buffet around 8ish also.

    someone at work suggested putting a few TVs with some console games for the kids/guys which might work and might not cost too much. Another guy said a poker table? Those sound fine for guys, if a little pricey i'd imagine, but its the women and its getting everyone (families) together i'm more interested in.

    heck i could put sports news on at the bar and it'd entertain the majority of the men, but i want to try and make it inclusive if possible.

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    Gold Member Parsley's Avatar
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    I agree that you could maybe start the evening 'do' earlier, just so that gap isn't so long! What about having disposable cameras out and having your guests recording their day as well? Get as many old photos of the two of you as you can and have them arranged for people to look at, maybe going as far up your family tree as you can, to show how the two of you got there! Maybe not spend quite as much time as you'd like consummating...mingling with your guests will help them feel less ignored, and build up the tension for the wedding night ;-)

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    Platinum Member hers's Avatar
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    honestly, if there's that big of a gap, i'd leave....

    i've never been to a wedding with that much time in between. it seems a little ridiculous. you can't expect people to stand around for 3 hours. do 45 minutes, tops. usually that time is for pictures that haven't been able to be taken yet (bride with groom, etc).

    i used to cater weddings and i've been to a bunch, and one couple had everyone waiting up to an hour and a half. no one danced even though there was a DJ b/c traditionally the bride and groom do the first dance to get the evening started. so tehre was a lot of standing around, people getting drinks, eating hor'derves but people started getting antsy and left after about 45 minutes.

    do no more than an hour or else you'll lose some of your guest list.

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    If all of them are spending the night at this country house, that's a little different. They're going to be there for the night regardless, and they have the option of just going and relaxing in their rooms during the lull in the festivities.

    I'd suggest having various options for them to entertain themselves for those few hours. How about organizing some games? Could be anything from a lawn game tournament to a trivia tournament to a treasure hunt to mock "gambling" tables where the big winners can cash in their chips for some silly prizes.

    Are there any sights/attractions of interest nearby? You could organize an outing, or at least have a handout with maps, directions, admission info, etc.

    Is there a movie room? You could have a wedding movie marathon running.

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    Woah. 6 HOURS? Even a 3 hour gap seems ridiculously long to me, if your ceremony and reception site are in the same place. I'm with hersmudders...we'll be down the street at the bar having some drinks, if you want to join us.

    Here is a thought - however, it has the potential to mess with a lot of plans, if you're past the initial planning stage, I'm sure.

    Why not have a small ceremony, with only close, close family...and then have the reception later on at night with the hundreds of people? That way you don't have all of these folks wandering around wondering what to do next for hours on end. They can plan to arrive at the reception site much later. That, or move the ceremony time closer towards the reception time.

    Six hours? Really? I have NEVER had that - the only gap I've experienced at any wedding has been maybe a light cocktail hour in between the ceremony and the reception.

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