overweight & dating

I am 30 lbs overweight. Do you think overweight guys should only date overweight women? Would it be a very safe assumption that non-overweight women are above my league?

some guys like bigger girls. thinner girls are not better than you. however if you're unhealthy then you should strive to be healthier.

I am 30 lbs overweight. Do you think overweight guys should only date overweight women? Would it be a very safe assumption that non-overweight women are above my league?

Not above your league-just in a different one. I live a very active lifestyle-I workout (run, lift weights etc.) 5-6x a week. I eat pretty well. Don't smoke, don't drink. So I would want a guy who was like me in that respect. It is a matter of compatibility.

On the otherhand, if you're 30 lbs overweight and you're making an effort to get in shape by exercising and eating right-and you decide you're going to live the rest of your life that way if all goes well-then I would reconsider you as an option. But if you're 30 lbs overweight and not doing anything to change that-then honestly it is a no-go.

I'm not bothered by my weight. I just need to put myself in a situation where I fit in.

No! Not at all! My husband is about 40 lbs overweight and I'm thin. While I would like for him to have a more healthy lifestyle, I couldn't be more attracted to him and so, so am not out of his league

I've have some family/friends/co workers who are overweight but have skinny or normal weight women as wives or girlfriends. The thing that seems to be common among them is that they are pretty outgoing and charismatic. Not quiet, dull, or sulk about their weight problem.

One thing I've noticed though is seeing more overweight men with thinner wives/gfs as opposed to overweight women with thinner husbands/bfs.

Technically my boyfriend is overweight for his height, but he is very broad-shouldered and built. I guess he has a bit of a gut, but somehow that part doesn't bother me/I don't even notice it. A lot of women like to date a man who is "bigger" than them, if not taller than wider. Women like to feel small for the most part, I think.

When you describe yourself as overweight, do you have a lot of extra poundage on a thinner frame or are you more broad-chested/built frame? I think it's easier to get away with the latter.

Deff. not my boyfriend is not MASSIVELY overweight but he is a big guy. He weighs 280 and i wouldnt want him to change at all

Dont limit yourself because of looks, find someone to like/love you for you.

I'm not bothered by my weight. I just need to put myself in a situation where I fit in.

He is very bothered by his weight too, but he doesnt let anyone bring him down. Go for it seriously

If people only dated others who fit their "areas" (Weight, height, etc, etc) the world would be a boring place. I know skinny guys who like biggers girls and bigger guys who like smaller girls (and vice versa with the females liking guys).. Each person is different.

My guy is a twig compared to me and he loves me just the way I am. He is 140lbs and I am a good 20lbs heavier than him. It bothered me at first but at this point I figure if he had a problem with it he wouldn't be with me in the first place. One of my good friends is a small girl and her husband is 6'1 280lbs so not very little at all and she loves him dearly.

You just find someone who is going to accept you for who you are not what you look like.

Not neccessarily.

being moderately overweight doesn't really bother me. and I am thin.

I think that looks should not be a limiting factor when going after potential partners, especially for long-term commitments. If all someone wants to do is "hook up with a bunch of hotties", then hey, it's their life, their call (not my cup of tea, personally). Everyone should be upfront and honest with themselves about what they want; it makes it a lot less painful for everyone in the long run.

I've always been curvy (and overweight for my height), and I've been with lots of different men, all of whom had different body types, 'looks', and personalities. What did they have in common with each other? I liked them and was attracted to them, and they to me.

Weight differences are not as important, to me, as lifestyle differences. If I have a partner who is overweight, but can keep up with me, or is willing to try, then that's just peachy!

Personally, if you are overweight, and don't care... then you don't really respect yourself. Being overweight, just like being underweight, can be damaging to your health. I don't base relationships entirely on looks, but if you don't respect yourself, then it makes it a lot harder to engage in a relationship with that sort of attitude.

I am 30 lbs overweight. Do you think overweight guys should only date overweight women? Would it be a very safe assumption that non-overweight women are above my league?

Every Guy is Different, like in my case I focus on Face, Hands, and Feet. So being overweight is not a issue to me. I rather be with someone big and pretty than average and skinny.

there are some guys in unbelievably good shape that love overweight women. it's all subjective.

I don't consider 30 lbs overweight overweight. 100 pounds overweight is enough to cause "caste" differences. But 30? Come on.

there are some guys in unbelievably good shape that love overweight women. it's all subjective.

Yes and two 23 year old woman at my work are engaged to men that are thin and they are both around 220. Everyone is attracted to different types and that shows it right there. My ex husband left me for someone who is 300pounds.

Yes and two 23 year old woman at my work are engaged to men that are thin and they are both around 220. Everyone is attracted to different types and that shows it right there. My ex husband left me for someone who is 300pounds.

your ex husband is a d-bag.

Can you find love? Of course! Can it be with a thin woman? Sure!

But, it wouldn't be someone like myself.

I live a VERY fit lifestyle. Having a rock hard body isn't essential to me in a mate, but someone who values their health certainly is.

I wouldn't date you solely for the fact that you don't take care of yourself. To me, if someone doesn't take care of their health, which truly is the most important thing, then I would assume you also let other important aspects of your life slide.

My boyfriend is 310 lbs.

I am 125lbs.

Size is definitely not important to me, he is the most amazing man i've ever met. I lost my 'best friend' quick when she started a bunch of BS about 'how much hotter I was and how I could do 40 times better than him'..

I am so attracted to him [mentally and physically] and wouldn't want it any other way.

The responses here are interesting. I'm not overweight, but I do have other "issues" and most of the time I write off women who seem physically perfect because it'd make sense that they'd want someone comparable to themselves for sexual reasons. Hmmm.

not always tyler. most do try and go for people with their somewhat lifestyle though. if it includes fitness, they usually go for fit people. usually.

Her size doesn't matter. What matters is that you have compatible lifestyles. If a thin girl is very active for instance, and you are not, it will cause a disparity in the activities you can enjoy together.

Can you find love? Of course! Can it be with a thin woman? Sure!

 

But, it wouldn't be someone like myself.

 

I live a VERY fit lifestyle. Having a rock hard body isn't essential to me in a mate, but someone who values their health certainly is.

 

I wouldn't date you solely for the fact that you don't take care of yourself. To me, if someone doesn't take care of their health, which truly is the most important thing, then I would assume you also let other important aspects of your life slide.

So people who are 30 pound overweight do not value their health and do not take care of themself? Hmmm...you have a very limited view of what taking care of yourself and concern for health is all about. I would say that getting routine checkups at the doctor, not smoking, not having casual sex, not going out to get drunk is also part of taking care of yourself. How many people who worship their bodies also run out and bang everyone in sight. Taking care of your body and your health is so much more than whether or not you are 30 pounds overweight. You can choose whoever you want....I don't take issue with that...what I do take issue with, however, is the assumption that many "fit" people make that being "fit" means you take care of yourself and not being "fit" means you couldn't care less about your health and taking care of yourself.

Her size doesn't matter. What matters is that you have compatible lifestyles. If a thin girl is very active for instance, and you are not, it will cause a disparity in the activities you can enjoy together.

Well what if she is not attracted to him because he is overweight , or he to her if she is overweight. Then having compatible lifestyles is moot at that point.