Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 5 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 46

Thread: Do dating sites work for shy people who have never dated before?

  1. #1
    WorkingInLin
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Age
    34
    Posts
    140
    Gender
    Male

    Do dating sites work for shy people who have never dated before?

    So, it's getting ridiculous at my age that I haven't even been on a first date. I've always been shy around women, but I'm trying to break out of that now. I'm thinking about joining a dating site, but are dating sites good for people who have no dating experience (especially in their mid to late 20s?)

    I honestly don't know whether to click the signup button, or declare myself celibate and a bachelor for life. I'm having no luck meeting women in real life, since I'm so shy, and they always turn out to be my friend. The dating sites might be a good avenue for meeting women another way, but do they really work?

  2. #2
    ellandroader
    Platinum Member ellandroader's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,002
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    I would say they can work, as it kind of forces others to get to know you a bit before meeting, which as a shy guy too, I can understand is difficult in the social arena.

    However you do need a thick skin as you can get rejected on there still, or someone who you email back and forth with may suddenly disappear.

    It's worth a go, just choose a reputable site especially if you want someone serious.

    Good Luck!

  3. #3
    WorkingInLin
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Age
    34
    Posts
    140
    Gender
    Male
    Can you recommend a good dating site? I know about Plenty of Fish, but I'm not sure how good that one is.

  4. #4
    ellandroader
    Platinum Member ellandroader's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,002
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    Hmmm...the paid ones tend to be the better ones (I don't think you are allowed to name other websites on this board). Anybody seeking a casual fling/hookup is less likely to pay for the privilege in my opinion.

  5. #5
    steve33
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    256
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingInLin [Register to see the link]
    So, it's getting ridiculous at my age that I haven't even been on a first date. I've always been shy around women, but I'm trying to break out of that now. I'm thinking about joining a dating site, but are dating sites good for people who have no dating experience (especially in their mid to late 20s?)

    I honestly don't know whether to click the signup button, or declare myself celibate and a bachelor for life. I'm having no luck meeting women in real life, since I'm so shy, and they always turn out to be my friend. The dating sites might be a good avenue for meeting women another way, but do they really work?
    Perhaps a religious site, if you've put it off for religious reasons, if just shyness, you're going to have an unpleasant experience and face lots of rejection. How you handle it is the real question.

  6. #6
    Gyromite
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Southern Cal
    Posts
    7
    Gender
    Male
    I was in a similar situation and started with POF. I looked at it as good practice.

    My advice is that before you start shelling out $20+ a month, sign up with POF and start building a profile. You'll eventually find out what works and what doesn't, and you can get together a good collection of profile pictures to use. Also, you'll get some practice with how to write messages that are more likely to get a response. Finally, you might even get in some practice dates. Once you have a few under your belt and have some idea of what type of person you're looking for (or not looking for), then I would say go ahead give a pay site a chance.

  7. #7
    MD Geist
    Silver Member MD Geist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Socal
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,606
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    I would start off with the free dating sites first to see how it works out for you then work your way up to the pay sites.

    Thats what I did.

  8. #8
    WorkingInLin
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Age
    34
    Posts
    140
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by steve33 [Register to see the link]
    Perhaps a religious site, if you've put it off for religious reasons, if just shyness, you're going to have an unpleasant experience and face lots of rejection. How you handle it is the real question.
    The problem is, while I have no problem with religion, I'm not really religious. I wouldn't have any issue with dating a Christian woman, but she's going to wonder why I don't go to church or why I'm disinterested in it.

    It's shyness that's kept me from dating. And I guess you're right, I'll face lots of rejection. I'm fine with that, as long as I meet someone worth dating and marrying in the end.

    I've signed up with a free site, and I'm working on a profile. I'll have to see how things go, and whether to stay with this prospect.

  9. #9
    bostonbruins24
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    479
    Quote Originally Posted by steve33 [Register to see the link]
    Perhaps a religious site, if you've put it off for religious reasons, if just shyness, you're going to have an unpleasant experience and face lots of rejection. How you handle it is the real question.
    Why is he going to face a lot of rejections?Is it because he is shy?Or do most guys get rejected a lot on dating sites? No one really knows anyone on a dating site,what happens in person ultimately will decide how it will turn out.How is any woman on a dating site going to know that he is shy and inexperienced unless he tells them?Most women will look at his pic and decide if they find him cute or not and decide to meet him in person,based on his appearance.

  10. #10
    steve33
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    256
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by bostonbruins24 [Register to see the link]
    Why is he going to face a lot of rejections?Is it because he is shy?Or do most guys get rejected a lot on dating sites? No one really knows anyone on a dating site,what happens in person ultimately will decide how it will turn out.How is any woman on a dating site going to know that he is shy and inexperienced unless he tells them?Most women will look at his pic and decide if they find him cute or not and decide to meet him in person,based on his appearance.
    Dating sites are no different than in person dating. You will face lots of rejection. It's guys that aren't phased by rejection that succeed. You can still meet up and get rejected. It's not all just the picture, but how you connect, and you can only figure that out by meeting. He needs to be prepared to handle rejection. Remember, most relationships, and even more dates, fail. Most dates don't lead to relationships, and the ones that do, most relationships don't last to marriage, and most marriages end in divorce. That's life. Those that handle rejection well win.

  11.  

Page 1 of 5 1234 ... LastLast
Top Threads
Beautiful women who works at lush...
So there is this a girl who works at this place. I've been in there twice now and she is a stunner. Its one of those girls who you have to look twice
Only casual?
Hey guys, So I've been crushing on this guy for a while. To start from the beginning, I met this guy accidentally through friends and I've been
I can't tell whether he's shy or uninterested?
My crush is a very shy guy. He won't talk to anyone but his friends. I'm assuming he knows that I like him because I was asking one of his friends
How do I make friends if I'm shy?
Hi everyone, this is my second post on this forum, I've been reading a lot of posts here and fond it helpful, however I think I need some advice on
Is she loving me ?
Hello my name is Gabriel i have 20 years old and i am in love whit Diane 20 years old . So ill tell you the story and please tell should i confese
Featured Threads
Tired of Being His Provider??
Okay so I found this site through Google. This seems like a pretty common topic and I suppose I just need to vent. My husband has been unemployed
Beautiful women who works at lush...
So there is this a girl who works at this place. I've been in there twice now and she is a stunner. Its one of those girls who you have to look twice
Being left for another man by my ex girlfriend
My and my ex gf broke up 7 months ago back in late April. We had bad fights and she stated she was unhappy. She then proceeded to have an active
Wondering?
Ok, I posted before about my situation but I would like to further talk. This woman I became involved with 3 years ago TOLD me she had feelings for
Break up Advice Needed
Hi all, I really need some advice on my recent break up with my girlfriend of almost five years. A few months ago I started to feel unhappy and
She's getting ready for marriage. She thinks that it is what I want. My fault.
So, I am pretty much in a difficult situation. I have been with a girl for the past 4 years. In these 4 years, after a while I realized she really
Venting - Advice...?
Hello, Im a 36 year old male, married with 3 kids. My wife and I are pretty much like roommates. There is zero sex life and its from both ends
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •