Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 5 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 46

Thread: Do dating sites work for shy people who have never dated before?

  1. #1
    WorkingInLin
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Age
    33
    Posts
    140
    Gender
    Male

    Do dating sites work for shy people who have never dated before?

    So, it's getting ridiculous at my age that I haven't even been on a first date. I've always been shy around women, but I'm trying to break out of that now. I'm thinking about joining a dating site, but are dating sites good for people who have no dating experience (especially in their mid to late 20s?)

    I honestly don't know whether to click the signup button, or declare myself celibate and a bachelor for life. I'm having no luck meeting women in real life, since I'm so shy, and they always turn out to be my friend. The dating sites might be a good avenue for meeting women another way, but do they really work?

  2. #2
    ellandroader
    Platinum Member ellandroader's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,002
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    I would say they can work, as it kind of forces others to get to know you a bit before meeting, which as a shy guy too, I can understand is difficult in the social arena.

    However you do need a thick skin as you can get rejected on there still, or someone who you email back and forth with may suddenly disappear.

    It's worth a go, just choose a reputable site especially if you want someone serious.

    Good Luck!

  3. #3
    WorkingInLin
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Age
    33
    Posts
    140
    Gender
    Male
    Can you recommend a good dating site? I know about Plenty of Fish, but I'm not sure how good that one is.

  4. #4
    ellandroader
    Platinum Member ellandroader's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,002
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    Hmmm...the paid ones tend to be the better ones (I don't think you are allowed to name other websites on this board). Anybody seeking a casual fling/hookup is less likely to pay for the privilege in my opinion.

  5. #5
    steve33
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    256
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingInLin [Register to see the link]
    So, it's getting ridiculous at my age that I haven't even been on a first date. I've always been shy around women, but I'm trying to break out of that now. I'm thinking about joining a dating site, but are dating sites good for people who have no dating experience (especially in their mid to late 20s?)

    I honestly don't know whether to click the signup button, or declare myself celibate and a bachelor for life. I'm having no luck meeting women in real life, since I'm so shy, and they always turn out to be my friend. The dating sites might be a good avenue for meeting women another way, but do they really work?
    Perhaps a religious site, if you've put it off for religious reasons, if just shyness, you're going to have an unpleasant experience and face lots of rejection. How you handle it is the real question.

  6. #6
    Gyromite
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Southern Cal
    Posts
    7
    Gender
    Male
    I was in a similar situation and started with POF. I looked at it as good practice.

    My advice is that before you start shelling out $20+ a month, sign up with POF and start building a profile. You'll eventually find out what works and what doesn't, and you can get together a good collection of profile pictures to use. Also, you'll get some practice with how to write messages that are more likely to get a response. Finally, you might even get in some practice dates. Once you have a few under your belt and have some idea of what type of person you're looking for (or not looking for), then I would say go ahead give a pay site a chance.

  7. #7
    MD Geist
    Silver Member MD Geist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Socal
    Age
    29
    Posts
    2,606
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    1
    I would start off with the free dating sites first to see how it works out for you then work your way up to the pay sites.

    Thats what I did.

  8. #8
    WorkingInLin
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Age
    33
    Posts
    140
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by steve33 [Register to see the link]
    Perhaps a religious site, if you've put it off for religious reasons, if just shyness, you're going to have an unpleasant experience and face lots of rejection. How you handle it is the real question.
    The problem is, while I have no problem with religion, I'm not really religious. I wouldn't have any issue with dating a Christian woman, but she's going to wonder why I don't go to church or why I'm disinterested in it.

    It's shyness that's kept me from dating. And I guess you're right, I'll face lots of rejection. I'm fine with that, as long as I meet someone worth dating and marrying in the end.

    I've signed up with a free site, and I'm working on a profile. I'll have to see how things go, and whether to stay with this prospect.

  9. #9
    bostonbruins24
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    479
    Quote Originally Posted by steve33 [Register to see the link]
    Perhaps a religious site, if you've put it off for religious reasons, if just shyness, you're going to have an unpleasant experience and face lots of rejection. How you handle it is the real question.
    Why is he going to face a lot of rejections?Is it because he is shy?Or do most guys get rejected a lot on dating sites? No one really knows anyone on a dating site,what happens in person ultimately will decide how it will turn out.How is any woman on a dating site going to know that he is shy and inexperienced unless he tells them?Most women will look at his pic and decide if they find him cute or not and decide to meet him in person,based on his appearance.

  10. #10
    steve33
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    256
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by bostonbruins24 [Register to see the link]
    Why is he going to face a lot of rejections?Is it because he is shy?Or do most guys get rejected a lot on dating sites? No one really knows anyone on a dating site,what happens in person ultimately will decide how it will turn out.How is any woman on a dating site going to know that he is shy and inexperienced unless he tells them?Most women will look at his pic and decide if they find him cute or not and decide to meet him in person,based on his appearance.
    Dating sites are no different than in person dating. You will face lots of rejection. It's guys that aren't phased by rejection that succeed. You can still meet up and get rejected. It's not all just the picture, but how you connect, and you can only figure that out by meeting. He needs to be prepared to handle rejection. Remember, most relationships, and even more dates, fail. Most dates don't lead to relationships, and the ones that do, most relationships don't last to marriage, and most marriages end in divorce. That's life. Those that handle rejection well win.

  11.  

Page 1 of 5 1234 ... LastLast
Top Threads
He's warming up to me, but how do I get closer to him?
I met a cute guy in my gym classes that i'm slowly getting to know. We have two mutual gym friends. He seems like a shy guy. I tried to befriend him
Need Advice-Both inexperienced first timers
First attempt at a thread on here, please be nice <: I'm a 16 year old girl with no prior relationship experience. He's 16 as well, with the same
How to deal with a now Ex Boyfriend who can't communicate?
What should I do? My boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago. I am having a hard time letting go since we had a really great relationship at the
Putting myself out there when I'm a loner
Hello all. First off, I'm Derry, I'm a guy, 25, and have had a problem I want advice on. For my whole life I've never had much friends, never had a
Was this a bad first date?
I used to be a nervous wreck when going on dates (and they're not too regular) but I've slowly got more confident. I've also read a lot of dating
Featured Threads
Ugly pictures
We had a professional photographer come in at work. I used the photo and put it on my dating profile. But when my Roomie saw it,she said take it
Not being "too" available.
I posted a few days ago about the younger guy I've been dating for 6 months and how he doesn't want to use BG/GF labels. I got some great feedback
I am having difficulty accepting my boyfriends bisexuality for no reason
So here goes; the main reason why I got this account here is probably because I am so ashamed of myself and that because I am surrounded by either
relationship advice
hi... I'll start by saying i'm a guy, i just really needed a woman's point of view for this, so i hope you can help me! My mom is paying for my
Seeing ex tomorrow..so confused. Need advice!
Hi everyone. I'm really confused with my ex. Dated two years; he was very hurt by the breakup. He hasn't dated many people, and I was his first
Needing advice and/or support with ex girlfriend
Ok. Long story short... I ended up in a serious relationship with my best friend of 7 years. The last 3 years of which we were in a serious
I really need some advice and a outside opinion
I really don't know what to do ... My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now she is no longer attracted to me but tells me she loves
Ask For Advice

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •