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Thread: Getting back together really does happen!

  1. #2371
    Bronze Member Thebighere's Avatar
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    If things continue as they are, i will have a full Getting Back Together story to share about getting back with my ex after 3 years apart (around 1.5 - 2 years of no contact minus a few google searches hehe)

    We were together 1.5 years. We broke up due to tensions due to life events. He broke up with me. I tried to get him to re-consider the first month or so, but then i said i except. I decided to go travelling. I really worked on myself. i mean REALLY!! This last year i threw myself completely into loving and enjoying my life. It was for me. I never expected to hear from him again.

    We both dated others.

    I am mid 30s, he is early 30s.
    We've both grown A LOT

    He reached out to me, and we are taking it slowly.
    I can't deny, reconnecting has been MAGICAL. Electrifying and exciting - This is clearly due to the existing attraction and connection. Despite the amazing feelings i am experiencing, i was moved on enough for the reconnection to be a new chapter. I don't feel desperate or eager (like i think i would have felt two years ago). No pressure.

    It's going great (AMAZING REALLY), but i want to wait until it has matured more before sharing more details (thats if anyone is interested haha).

    Just know, it can happen! It happened to me!!

  2. #2372
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    Originally Posted by Thebighere
    If things continue as they are, i will have a full Getting Back Together story to share about getting back with my ex after 3 years apart (around 1.5 - 2 years of no contact minus a few google searches hehe)

    We were together 1.5 years. We broke up due to tensions due to life events. He broke up with me. I tried to get him to re-consider the first month or so, but then i said i except. I decided to go travelling. I really worked on myself. i mean REALLY!! This last year i threw myself completely into loving and enjoying my life. It was for me. I never expected to hear from him again.

    We both dated others.

    I am mid 30s, he is early 30s.
    We've both grown A LOT

    He reached out to me, and we are taking it slowly.
    I can't deny, reconnecting has been MAGICAL. Electrifying and exciting - This is clearly due to the existing attraction and connection. Despite the amazing feelings i am experiencing, i was moved on enough for the reconnection to be a new chapter. I don't feel desperate or eager (like i think i would have felt two years ago). No pressure.

    It's going great (AMAZING REALLY), but i want to wait until it has matured more before sharing more details (thats if anyone is interested haha).

    Just know, it can happen! It happened to me!!

    Good for you!! I hope that I'll have the same opportunity.

  3. #2373
    Member BreadStick's Avatar
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    Please do update us :) holding my fingers crossed for you!

    Since he broke up with you, he was the one to contact you first, right? What did he say if I may ask?

  4. 02-15-2019, 02:53 AM

  5. #2374
    Bronze Member Thebighere's Avatar
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    Thank you @BreadStick and @MarcDebbie!

    I will return and provide details very soon :)

  6.  

  7. #2375
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    Originally Posted by thejigsup
    I've only gone back with two men in my lifetime. BIG MISTAKES! I will never go back again. If you are looking for fairy tales, read a book. People break up because the relationship is not working on some level. That never changes. You can get back together, but it is still not a healthy relationship most of the tme.
    I believe if it is fresh and you guys break up to work on yourselves and then come back that it can work out but if you were together for years and broke up then got together again I can see why it wouldn't work out.

  8. #2376
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    Well I am at almost +8 months of No Contact (started at the end of June, but started counting the days officially on July 1st. 1.5 or 2 years of NC seems reasonable to me in your case.

    As for me, I definitely feel a lot better. Most of the anger and animosity is gone. I may reach out as friends in early January 2020, I am not in a rush. Will let you know how it goes in the meantime between now and then. Personally, my best therapy is No Contact, daily exercises (intensive), and reading books about relationships. I also find that journaling works miracles!

  9. #2377
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    I'd like to post a few things here.
    1) The girl I was hung up on most of my HS and we had a few short relationships. Well, we split for about 3 years (those 3 years I was with my ex that I originally came here for). Shortly after I broke up with my ex, this girl gets in touch with me and we had a short fling for a few months, but I decided she's not for me and so we split again.

    2) My friend broke up with her boyfriend after about a year of dating, then after about 6 months they got back together and dated for another year and then split for good as it seems now.

    3) my friend just got back with his ex that he dated about 2 years ago, I dont believe he was in much contact with her.

    4)My "the ex" (that I came here for) contacted me long after our original breakup, I dont know what she wanted but I just deleted her message (I was well over her by then).

    Some of my friends also went back to their exes, but it never quite worked out.

    Now one thing that probably stands out from all of this. I came here about 3 years ago after a girl I really loved (and were together for a long time and planned our kids, blah blah). It took me about a year to be completely over her. Now there are other girls that are troubling my emotions.

    What I'm trying to say, to all of you that are hurting now, pain is just temporary, at some point it will get better and you will get over your ex (I'd say forget, but you never actually forget, they just remain in your mind like a good childhood friend that you went out of touch with). Just keep on strong, all it takes is time and avoiding of rubbing the wound.

    Sometimes it seems like there is no end to a pain, but that's not true, that's just your addiction troubling you.

  10. #2378
    Bronze Member Thebighere's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Wolfshook
    I'd like to post a few things here.
    1) The girl I was hung up on most of my HS and we had a few short relationships. Well, we split for about 3 years (those 3 years I was with my ex that I originally came here for). Shortly after I broke up with my ex, this girl gets in touch with me and we had a short fling for a few months, but I decided she's not for me and so we split again.

    2) My friend broke up with her boyfriend after about a year of dating, then after about 6 months they got back together and dated for another year and then split for good as it seems now.

    3) my friend just got back with his ex that he dated about 2 years ago, I dont believe he was in much contact with her.

    4)My "the ex" (that I came here for) contacted me long after our original breakup, I dont know what she wanted but I just deleted her message (I was well over her by then).

    Some of my friends also went back to their exes, but it never quite worked out.

    Now one thing that probably stands out from all of this. I came here about 3 years ago after a girl I really loved (and were together for a long time and planned our kids, blah blah). It took me about a year to be completely over her. Now there are other girls that are troubling my emotions.

    What I'm trying to say, to all of you that are hurting now, pain is just temporary, at some point it will get better and you will get over your ex (I'd say forget, but you never actually forget, they just remain in your mind like a good childhood friend that you went out of touch with). Just keep on strong, all it takes is time and avoiding of rubbing the wound.

    Sometimes it seems like there is no end to a pain, but that's not true, that's just your addiction troubling you.
    Great words of advice!

  11. #2379
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    I also have some stories when exes got back:

    1.) my cousin dated this guy for few years then broke up with him, started dating again and few years later, they again got together - they are now married and have 2 children

    2.) me and my current ex, were dating for 7 years, when she broke up with me because of trust issues, we were apart 2 yrs before gotten together again...for the whole time while being apart we remained very close friends, she had some guys while I was too clingy and too afraid of losing her so I had none. Tbh if I had some balls, or would know how, we could have gotten back together much sooner. Now few months ago she broke up with me once again, because I neglected her and wasn't masculine enough. We're now in limited contact, so I don't know how will it end this time. I'm hoping for the best.

  12. #2380
    Member BreadStick's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Coyote
    I also have some stories when exes got back:

    1.) my cousin dated this guy for few years then broke up with him, started dating again and few years later, they again got together - they are now married and have 2 children

    2.) me and my current ex, were dating for 7 years, when she broke up with me because of trust issues, we were apart 2 yrs before gotten together again...for the whole time while being apart we remained very close friends, she had some guys while I was too clingy and too afraid of losing her so I had none. Tbh if I had some balls, or would know how, we could have gotten back together much sooner. Now few months ago she broke up with me once again, because I neglected her and wasn't masculine enough. We're now in limited contact, so I don't know how will it end this time. I'm hoping for the best.
    What do you mean with "if I had some balls or would know how -"?


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