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Thread: Does "happy valentines day" from the ex really mean anything ?

  1. #11
    1MoreChance
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ideal [Register to see the link]
    I've read a few posts about dumpees receiving or waiting to receive a "happy valentines day" message from the dumper. My ex (the dumper) sent a message last night at like 1 am saying "Happy Valentines Day"...Just curious, does it really mean anything when the dumper sends the dumpee this kinda message ?
    what do you want it to mean?? if they know it's over and know what "having hope" feels like and how much it hurts, why on EARTH would they want to put you through that????? It seems selfish and super immature.

    SHOULD they feel like some type of reconciliation is something they want, they should contact you and meet with you and open heartedly talk to you.

    man, people are so friggin' immature!!!!

    lol I was sad that my ex didn,t send me anything , and I just realised that it is becasue he s NICE that he didn't.

  2. #12
    lost!
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    To be honest, no. I don't think it means anything. Everybody sends a simple 'Happy Valentine's Day' message to everybody else these days, regardless of intimacy or relationship.

  3. 02-15-2009, 10:32 AM

  4. #13
    rapunzel
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    Well I got a Happy Valentines Day all! through group email sent by my ex pertaining to a business reason.....since it was sent to 8 other people beside me, including several men, I know it means nothing!

  5. #14
    RougeKali823
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    Nope, they're just throwing you a bone.

  6. #15
    RougeKali823
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    Quote Originally Posted by lost! [Register to see the link]
    To be honest, no. I don't think it means anything. Everybody sends a simple 'Happy Valentine's Day' message to everybody else these days, regardless of intimacy or relationship.
    I sure did.

  7. #16
    Crazyaboutdogs
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    At one place I worked I shared an office with a male colleague. He was about 10-15 years older than I and was married and had a child. We had a good working relationship and used to joke around and chat. One year on Valentine's Day he put a chocolate on my desk as a Happy Valentine's Day. It certainly wasn't a romantic gesture, it was just a fun gesture in the spirit of the day...kind of like how many people dress in green on St. Patrick's Day even if they are not Irish. It just becomes something to celebrate in the spirit of good fun.

  8. 02-15-2009, 07:06 PM

  9. #17
    Cognitive_Canine
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misskitty16 [Register to see the link]
    We are talking about an ex here. It is my belief (and experience) that most ex's prefer to AVOID contact unless they still have some residual feeling or hope to reconcile.

    Now, I am by no means saying it means a dumper wants to reconcile. Just that you are in their thoughts and everything they feel for you is not dead and gone.
    Actually, I find it is just the opposite.

    The ones that respect you leave you alone and do not contact you. They also do not contact to save their own feelings.

    The ones that don't care will keep you dragging along. The text is just a fun game for them.

  10. 02-15-2009, 07:19 PM

  11. #18
    lost!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misskitty16 [Register to see the link]
    Yes, it means something. If someone had no feelings for you whatsoever, they would not bother sending it. They wouldn't even make contact.

    ..
    Actually, no, they don't.
    My friends all send me Happy Valentine's Day messages ad I'm not in intimate relationships with them, and my colleagues from work sent me Happy Valentine's Day e-mails just to be friendly... this is what I was getting at.

  12. 02-15-2009, 07:39 PM

  13. #19
    lost!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misskitty16 [Register to see the link]
    ..
    I understand. The difference here for OP is that this was not a friend or colleague. It was an ex.

    I see a text message of any kind (or email, phone call, etc) to an ex (unless it is for practical matters or kids, etc) as "reaching out", unless the two have been friends since the breakup and have remained in contact, which I don't think is OP's case.

    Did you contact any ex's to wish them happy V-day? I didn't.
    This is definitely true, you're right. But I think it depends on the circumstance. If it was just a message that send something like "Happy Valentine's Day!" it could have been a mass-message sent to all of their friends. I know heaps of people do things like this. But if it was more personalised towards the OP... then you're right - it could most definitely be a way of reaching out and possibly means something...

  14. #20
    Ideal
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    Quote Originally Posted by lost! [Register to see the link]
    This is definitely true, you're right. But I think it depends on the circumstance. If it was just a message that send something like "Happy Valentine's Day!" it could have been a mass-message sent to all of their friends. I know heaps of people do things like this. But if it was more personalised towards the OP... then you're right - it could most definitely be a way of reaching out and possibly means something...
    It was an IM, not a text, so it wasn't a mass message.

    Also, MIsskitty, apart of me hopes you're right about him reaching out, but I guess it would be better to just not think much of it because I tend to get disappointed every time he brings my hopes up. If he was reaching out, then hopefully he will find a more effective method, if not, then I hope that was the end of it.

  15. 02-15-2009, 09:02 PM

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