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I am so jealous of my boyfriends pasts!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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I need help and I need help bad.

 

Here are the problems Im dealing with on a daily basis.

 

 

A. Im jealous that my boyfriend has slept with 3 girls (including me)

 

B. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend, so I'm like way jealous that he has slept with other girls, and I havent slept with other guys.

 

C. I just can't stand the fact that my boyfriend has slept with other girls, and I can't these nasty images in my head that hurt so bad. I just want to die sometimes when I imagine it.

 

D. I just don't know why I am so jealous and this makes me so mad, I know he can't help what he did, this was before we were even dating.

 

E. I check up on his ex girlfriend, and the * * * * he had a one night stand with, and I don't know what else to do.

 

F. I feel like he doesnt care bout me as much as iI care about him.

 

G. We are both 20.

 

H. I'm always scared that he thinks about other girls when we have sex.

 

I. I'm always scared that he doesnt find me attractive anymore, and that he doesn't love me as much as when we first started dating.

 

J. Im always worried that he thinks about his ex.

 

K. I'm mad that his ex took his virginity.

 

L. Im just sooooooooooooooo jealous about his past, I hate this girl he used to have a crush on with a passion. I HATE her!

 

M. What do I do to get rid of this problem, I am sick of always feeling like crap. Somebody please help me.

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All i can really tell you is that if you keep worrying like this, your worst fears will come to fruition. Insecurity isn't attractive and you will drive him away.

 

As for tips on how to get rid of the insecurity, i have to suggest a counselor because it isn't an easy malady to heal. YOu have to WANT to be rid of it tho.

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All i can really tell you is that if you keep worrying like this, your worst fears will come to fruition. Insecurity isn't attractive and you will drive him away.

 

As for tips on how to get rid of the insecurity, i have to suggest a counselor because it isn't an easy malady to heal. YOu have to WANT to be rid of it tho.

 

 

Yes your right I could drive him away, but I just hate keeping this bottled up inside, so I have to tell him what bothers me.

 

Somebody else help.

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I would be careful about how much you share with him. Most of this - no ALL of this - is coming from inside you. He has done nothing wrong. If you start unleashing this on him you will make him most likely feel uneasy. What can sharing this do? Can he change his past? NO, he can't. Only YOU can change your thoughts and sharing this with him won't help. You have to will yourself to think a different thought pattern here. STOP letting images of him with these other girls enter your head. You have control of what you think about. Stop giving up valuable real estate in your brain to such non controllable issues.

 

It's non productive. In a nutshell all i can say is - STOP THAT.

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I say be thankful he's not like mine ha. I'm 19 he's 28 I've been with two including him and I'm his number 17... He had a crazy time. It was hard and I still think of it ESP because I know like 3 of them ha.

 

Yeah if my boyfriend had slept with 17 girls, I dont think he would even have a chance with me. lol (No offense or anything) But, I couldn't handle that lol.

 

But your story did make me feel a tad bit better, but not much.

 

:sad: I feel like I love my boyfriend way more then he loves me.

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What's wrong with him sleeping with other girls in the past? He didn't know you yet. \

Does he still talk to his exes?

Did you know that he wasn't a virgin before you guys got together?

 

M. What do I do to get rid of this problem, I am sick of always feeling like crap. Somebody please help me.

I think that you need to work on your insecurity issues. No one's past is perfect. You should love your boyfriend for who he is. His past has made him the person he is today.

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I would be careful about how much you share with him. Most of this - no ALL of this - is coming from inside you. He has done nothing wrong. If you start unleashing this on him you will make him most likely feel uneasy. What can sharing this do? Can he change his past? NO, he can't. Only YOU can change your thoughts and sharing this with him won't help. You have to will yourself to think a different thought pattern here. STOP letting images of him with these other girls enter your head. You have control of what you think about. Stop giving up valuable real estate in your brain to such non controllable issues.

 

It's non productive. In a nutshell all i can say is - STOP THAT.

 

Thank you for taking the time to write to me I really appricate your advice.

 

I just wish sometimes my boyfriend understood how I felt, and I wish he was jealous like I am. Its hard being the ONLY jealous person in a relationship, because he doesnt understand how I feel.

 

And I dont really share everything with him, just somethings when I'm really mad.

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Yes your right I could drive him away, but I just hate keeping this bottled up inside, so I have to tell him what bothers me.

 

Somebody else help.

 

It's ok to tell your partner how you feel, but if you are doing it just to unload everything from yourself onto him then I find that a little selfish. This is something that you need to work on. He can't help you with this.

I made a mistake like this too in my relationship. I was feeling insecure and I felt that it was my SOs job to fix it.

Gosh, what a mistake.

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What's wrong with him sleeping with other girls in the past? He didn't know you yet. \

Does he still talk to his exes?

Did you know that he wasn't a virgin before you guys got together?

 

 

I think that you need to work on your insecurity issues. No one's past is perfect. You should love your boyfriend for who he is. His past has made him the person he is today.

 

I never was insecure until me and him started dating.

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It's ok to tell your partner how you feel, but if you are doing it just to unload everything from yourself onto him then I find that a little selfish. This is something that you need to work on. He can't help you with this.

 

 

 

I just wish he would give me more attention like when we first started dating, it really sucks because I feel like he doesn't love me like he used to. But IM CRAZY over him.

 

My friends tell me all the time, and his friends too : "Why don't you just break up with him, you look better then him blah blah blah" But I dont listen to other people. I just love him, even though he's not the hottest guy ever.

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my current SO has been with over 50 girls...who am i to judge...he had his wild past...i had mine too...it was all before we knew each other so why dwell on it?

If you want to ruin a relationship fast stay on this kind of thing...no guys like a girl who is needlessly jealous and who obsesses over things he can't change...

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A. Im jealous that my boyfriend has slept with 3 girls (including me)

 

B. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend, so I'm like way jealous that he has slept with other girls, and I havent slept with other guys.

 

C. I just can't stand the fact that my boyfriend has slept with other girls, and I can't these nasty images in my head that hurt so bad. I just want to die sometimes when I imagine it.

 

D. I just don't know why I am so jealous and this makes me so mad, I know he can't help what he did, this was before we were even dating.

 

E. I check up on his ex girlfriend, and the * * * * he had a one night stand with, and I don't know what else to do.

 

F. I feel like he doesnt care bout me as much as iI care about him.

 

G. We are both 20.

 

H. I'm always scared that he thinks about other girls when we have sex.

 

I. I'm always scared that he doesnt find me attractive anymore, and that he doesn't love me as much as when we first started dating.

 

J. Im always worried that he thinks about his ex.

 

K. I'm mad that his ex took his virginity.

 

L. Im just sooooooooooooooo jealous about his past, I hate this girl he used to have a crush on with a passion. I HATE her!

 

M. What do I do to get rid of this problem, I am sick of always feeling like crap. Somebody please help me.

Link to comment
What's wrong with him sleeping with other girls in the past? He didn't know you yet. \

Does he still talk to his exes?

Did you know that he wasn't a virgin before you guys got together?

 

 

I think that you need to work on your insecurity issues. No one's past is perfect. You should love your boyfriend for who he is. His past has made him the person he is today.

 

I'm not saying its wrong that he slept with other girls, I'm saying IT HURTS. Im JEALOUS.

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I just wish he would give me more attention like when we first started dating, it really sucks because I feel like he doesn't love me like he used to. But IM CRAZY over him.

 

My friends tell me all the time, and his friends too : "Why don't you just break up with him, you look better then him blah blah blah" But I dont listen to other people. I just love him, even though he's not the hottest guy ever.

 

Your friends don't sound very helpful. Who cares if you look better than him? You need to get a grip here. He did nothing wrong, the insecurity is all on YOUR head, and it has nothing to do with who is more attractive in a relationship it has to do with who is more secure, and at this point sounds like he holds all the cards.

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my current SO has been with over 50 girls...who am i to judge...he had his wild past...i had mine too...it was all before we knew each other so why dwell on it?

If you want to ruin a relationship fast stay on this kind of thing...no guys like a girl who is needlessly jealous and who obsesses over things he can't change...

 

I've only slept with one guy thats why it hurts. If I would of slept with 5 guys then I wouldn't care as much.

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Your friends don't sound very helpful. Who cares if you look better than him? You need to get a grip here. He did nothing wrong, the insecurity is all on YOUR head, and it has nothing to do with who is more attractive in a relationship it has to do with who is more secure, and at this point sounds like he holds all the cards.

 

Yeah he is more secure thats for sure, he doesn't get jealous at all. I'm the jealous one. All my past boyfriends have been jealous and my boyfriend now seems like he doesnt even care that much about me.

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Thank you for taking the time to write to me I really appricate your advice.

 

I just wish sometimes my boyfriend understood how I felt, and I wish he was jealous like I am. Its hard being the ONLY jealous person in a relationship, because he doesnt understand how I feel.

 

And I dont really share everything with him, just somethings when I'm really mad.

 

jealousy does not equal love. In fact, jealousy is selfishness. Selfishness is the opposite of love.

 

 

I never was insecure until me and him started dating.

 

Correct me if I'm wrong, but this sounds like your first real relationship. And if it is, it means you were always insecure.

 

I just wish he would give me more attention like when we first started dating, it really sucks because I feel like he doesn't love me like he used to. But IM CRAZY over him.

 

My friends tell me all the time, and his friends too : "Why don't you just break up with him, you look better then him blah blah blah" But I dont listen to other people. I just love him, even though he's not the hottest guy ever.

 

Relationships tend to settle down over time. We can't have all those chemicals in our brains forever.

But if you really want that than think about it this way: Why should he try harder? You do everything already. Maybe if you back off a little he'll give you more attention. But ask yourself if that's the kind of relationship you want to be in.

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Thanks for sharing your opinion. I never used to be like this, seriousally. That's why I'm so worried, it's usually the guy being jealous about me, and now I feel like I'm jealous of my boyfriend. I'm sick of it. I just want my boyfriend to show me he cares and stuff, and not to make me feel so insecure. And I don't have a lot of experiance with sex, I just lost my virginity last month, and I'm worried he is thinking about other girls when we do it.

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that doesn't make sense to me...do you feel like you are missing out?

 

Well I waited so long, I was going to wait until marriage, and then me and my boyfriend moved in together. We've been together for 2 years, and lived together for 1 year. And I just feel like I wish I had more experiance with guys, so I can be better in bed...I feel insecure.

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