Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 9 of 20 FirstFirst ... 6789101112 ... LastLast
Results 81 to 90 of 200

Thread: Other guys are pissing me off...

  1. #81

    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,996
    Gender
    Female
    Well what if they are sharing a hotel room together? That would really bother me, and I know he would do anything possible NOT to share a room with her, even if it meant shelling out extra cash because he would be on edge and uncomfortable the whole time.

    Let me put it simply, other then my boyfriend, and my one guy friend, I DONT like guys. That's all there is to it, they annoy me. And I can't stand to be around them unless its my boyfriend's friends or its a group thing, I don't like hanging out with them one on one.

    And when you get raped by someone you THINK is your friend, that doesnt go away. Trust doesn't come easy to me, and I think I have every reason to feel that way.

  2. #82
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Age
    35
    Posts
    9,499
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Rose21
    Let me put it simply, other then my boyfriend, and my one guy friend, I DONT like guys. That's all there is to it, they annoy me. And I can't stand to be around them unless its my boyfriend's friends or its a group thing, I don't like hanging out with them one on one.
    I understand...you have a bias against guys in general. I think that is being a bit unfair to guys because they're not all bad. I think they are mostly good actually, if you give them a chance.

    Originally Posted by Rose21
    And when you get raped by someone you THINK is your friend, that doesn't go away. Trust doesn't come easy to me, and I think I have every reason to feel that way.
    I'm sorry you went through that. I can understand why that would make you not want male friends, but I think that is something that can be addressed and overcome with help from the right people. I don't think you should have to live with the inability to trust guys as friends. I do think you will miss out on a lot of great friendships and interactions that way.

  3. #83

    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,996
    Gender
    Female
    It's just for me though. I don't want to hang out with guys one on one. If I hang out with them in groups thats fine, I just want someone else to be there to back me up.

    I don't feel comfortable with it, and thats just simple.

    Every guy I've ever known except for my boyfriend and Scott have been a jerk. I dont need to make any more new friends that are guys when I have everything I want. Nobody will change that for me.

  4. #84
    Platinum Member jengh's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    San Francisco
    Age
    32
    Posts
    7,557
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Rose21

    And when you get raped by someone you THINK is your friend, that doesnt go away. Trust doesn't come easy to me, and I think I have every reason to feel that way.
    I understand that... The same thing happened to me when I was only 14. I was drugged and raped by a guy I was friends with.

    But the thought of giving up my male friends JUST because I have a boyfriend makes me sad. I love my guy friends. I've never hooked up with them, nor have they tried to hook up with me. Maybe it's because I'm not soooooo attractive

    You're missing out on a lot of friendships, Ithink.

  5.  

  6. #85

    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,996
    Gender
    Female
    Yeah but all of the guy friends I have had before atleast 85% of them I had done stuff with. Never sex but other stuff. And me getting raped just happened in Janurary.

  7. #86
    Platinum Member jengh's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    San Francisco
    Age
    32
    Posts
    7,557
    Gender
    Female
    damn, that's recent. I'm sorry. Therapy helps if you haven't tried it already.

  8. #87

    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,996
    Gender
    Female
    No I haven't but still...We don't have the money for that now.

    I just choose not to hang out with guys one on one because it is akward and disrespectful to my boyfriend, and same with him.

    I mean, if I meet cool people and I want to go on a goup outing with them then thats fine.

    For me, I'm more comfortable in a group. Except when I'm with my girlfriends, I like it better when its just me and them one on one. I haven't really hung out with one in awhile because we never get alone time. She always hangs out with these total loser guys who constantly disrespect me, and they go to this one place which is never any fun for me, so why go if I can't enjoy myself?

    But It's just akward to hang out with guys one on one because my boyfriend and I are total monogomists. Whenever we would hang out with the opposite sex one on one, it was either a date, we were trying to get to know them better TO date them, or we were just really interested. So to hang out with a guy one on one when you already have a boyfriend? Yeah, akward for me.

    But the way it happened with the rape situation was there was this guy I went out with for like 1.5 months. It wasn't long, but I was in love with him. I dated other men afterward of course, but I was crushed when it ended and never fully got over him. Whenever I was single or a relationship was going badly i would think of him. I was still deeply in love with him. we messed around like 3 times when he was with his girlfriend,and then it just stopped. And when he was single, I was so happy because I thought we could get back together. And then when he came over that time, I told him straight up I didn't want to go past 3rd base with him. He knows my principals, that I don't have sex unless I'm in a very serious relationship, and I don't hook up. But he put it in anyways,despite the fact that I told him no and was saying no afterward. For a few hrs afterward it didn't hit me because I thought that I loved him and that deep down that was what I wanted and it was okay because I loved him. But then afterwards I realized that it was totaly wrong and I realized I had been taken advantage of and was furious. So I was able to totaly let go of any feelings I ever had for him after that.

    Thats another reason why I don't hang out with that one friend as often, not only because of the stupid guys, but the guy that raped me is there alot with them! she's friends with him. Even dated him for 2 weeks, even though she knew what happened to me! so yeah, I don't know if we will ever be able to go to being friends the way we once were.

  9. #88
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    50,777
    So sorry about the rape.

    In my life experience, the view that hanging out one on one with a man is presumably for romantic reasons seems pretty narrow minded, with the unfortunate result that you are shutting yourself off from potentially rewarding friendships and life experiences. But, if that is what makes you comfortable, that is your decision and priority.

  10. #89

    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    3,561
    Gender
    Female
    If it really gets to you, and you think the compliments will crush your soul; think of how REALLY hot people feel.

    Think of Megan Fox, Angelina Jolie, Scarlett Jo, Halle Berry. They must be absolutely miserable and close to death because they are some of the most attractive people in the world.


    Cheer up.

  11. #90

    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Age
    30
    Posts
    2,996
    Gender
    Female
    they don't crush my soul, sometimes Im flattered and it helps when I'm having a bad day.

    But to hear it CONSTANTLY from people that I don't really know or mean nothing to me, can get a little annoying. Expec persistent guys.

Page 9 of 20 FirstFirst ... 6789101112 ... LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •