MySpace Picture

I know, I know, I know... I shouldn't even be checking it.

Quick story. Ex broke up with me Nov. 29. I sent a few e-mails that week and finally got a reply Dec. 2 that she was "sorry it had to be this way". I have been in NC since. The first week, she changed her MySpace to "Single" and then took down a picture of us that she had on there. She never removed me as a Friend, but removed me from her Top Friends. She also left a friend of mine on there and my sister as her Friend. She hasn't really made any changes to her profile except adding one picture that first week of her at a party that I knew she was going to.

Fast forward. This Saturday, I posted pictures of my and my family at the Las Vegas Marathon. I've posted other pictures between the breakup and these pictures. Sunday morning, I notice she put up a new picture -- her running a 10K on Thanksgiving. She and I shared athletics in common, so these things are kind of a big deal. Why did she do this? I can't just be coincidence that she posted that picture the day after I put up my pictures, especially since her race was almost 3 weeks before. I am not going to contact her, but it's been making me think since yesterday and it sucks!

A friend told me she made her profile private as well, which she never did before. So... only her friends can see those pictures. Most of her friends on MySpace aren't that good of friends. My only option is to remove her as a Friend, but I can't do it. I'm just not there yet...

From the outside looking in, I dont think shes changing anything because of you. Most likely she felt like putting the picture up. I know how it feels looking at their myspaces though. When I was going through the break up at first I would check it a lot, reading into everything. Eventually it caused me enough stress (she started seeing someone 3 weeks into the break up though) that I never looked again.

I feel that your options are to stop using the site or to remove her from your friends. Its just hard because you see all your friends status updates and stuff.

For me, I stopped using the site for probably 3 months now. I will get back on soon, but she wont be on my friends. If you feel like you cant remove her yet, consider just not logging in for a while or something.

And, as always, this is totally normal and I am sorry that you are going through it. I still think you are trucking through this time as best as anyone could, so keep that up. Were all thinking about you.

I've decided MySpace is evil! My ex deleted his profile weeks before the split (it was a band profile and the band had been broken up for a year). The night he left I changed my mood to "crushed" and first thing the next morning he sends me a text asking about it. Several of his friends had called to tell him. I find myself looking at his friends and family's MySpace pages daily to see if he's created a new profile so I could stalk it as well!

I'm thinking of deleting my page just so I won't be tempted anymore.

um I think you're reading too much into this.

for example, I change pictures when I see other changing them because otherwise I don't think about it.

ps. I don't use the evil myspace either

take it from one who knows, while you continue to check the myspace profile you will go nowhere.

you will read whatever you want into anything she says or does on that page and not give yourself a chance to heal or move forward.

it's not been long since your breakup (though i'm sure it feels like a lifetime) so don't be too harsh on yourself at this time.

all i know is that no good came from me checking her profile. it took me to the very edge many times. i've come on in leaps and bounds since i found the strength to stop going there. i don't have an account there so i don't quite know how it works. is there any way you can block her without taking her off your list?

stay strong fella

I agree. Stop looking at her MySpace!! Delete her. I KNOW it's easier said than done, breaking up and still loving someone is so hard. But you are tourmenting yourself. Please try to delete her so you don't read so much into the little things! I agree that she probably meant nothing by it. Thing is you know your ex well..we don't! So you would know more than us. But remember your grieving so your not exatly thinking as logical as you could be. And as an added bonus - I bt you if you do she'll be shocked Hang in there.

i think that MySpace is a very strange and voyeuristic thing... and people are constantly trying to interpret things from it like tea leaves...

in other words, if your only connection to her is looking at her MySpace and trying to figure out her motives, you will see what you WANT to see or read a lot into it that has nothing to do with what is going on with her, though it may make you FEEL more in control or connected to her.

the important thing is you are no longer in contact, so if that is the case, keeping the MySpace peephole into her world is not healthy for you because it is giving you the illusion you are connected.

she may have put that picture up there to show she looks good in shorts, or that she's athletic and trying to attract a new athletic guy... so it could have nothing to do with you at all, and just tortures you.

so for your own sake you need to stop looking. so many people get false hopes and wrong impressions by trying to keep tabs on their exes through MySpace... it's really virtual stalking, and doesn't change anything, so give yourself a break and delete her. she has your number, and if she wants to come back, she'll tell you.

how this Myspace thing usually progresses is she will eventually post a picture of her with other guys, and it'll crush you... so why set yourself up for that?

I really dont think she is playing games or doing anything to her myspace because of you.

Last year I had broke up with a girl I was seeing. We are "myspace friends." I never deleted her because I didn't want her to know she got to me/bothered me/hurt me....so I just left her on there and never looked at her profile.

I recommend doing the same, unless you really can't control yourself, then delete her.

I really dont think she is playing games or doing anything to her myspace because of you.

 

Last year I had broke up with a girl I was seeing. We are "myspace friends." I never deleted her because I didn't want her to know she got to me/bothered me/hurt me....so I just left her on there and never looked at her profile.

 

I recommend doing the same, unless you really can't control yourself, then delete her.

Is she still your friend to this day?

Is she still your friend to this day?

on myspace? yup.

i just went and checked....wasn't sure if maybe she deleted me at some point.

on myspace? yup.

 

i just went and checked....wasn't sure if maybe she deleted me at some point.

Do you ever talk to her? Why not just delete her now after a year? I'm confused...

Why did you break up with her?

i never talk to her, but probably will eventually. not call her or anything, but im sure we'll run into each other seeing we have some mutual friends. not a big deal to me.

i dont know, why would i delete her?

she broke up with me, you'd have to ask her. all i know is she sent me an email right before NYE last year and said we should stop seeing that. oh well.

i never talk to her, but probably will eventually. not call her or anything, but im sure we'll run into each other seeing we have some mutual friends. not a big deal to me.

 

i dont know, why would i delete her?

 

she broke up with me, you'd have to ask her. all i know is she sent me an email right before NYE last year and said we should stop seeing that. oh well.

Well, if she's not your friend and you don't look at her MySpace, it seems like you should delete her. I'm just playing devil's advocate because I have not been able to delete my ex, but I know why.

I'm sorry to hear about the breakup last year, but you seem to be doing fine now. Have you met anyone else? I wonder why she never deleted you?

to sign on, look for her, click on the delete button...that wouldn't be worth my time. it's not bothering me with her there as i assume i don't bother being on hers. its just not something i really think about i guess.

im fine, it's not a big deal (anymore). i've met plenty of women since then, none that ive gotten serious with. i am going on a date on friday, so who knows....but when it happens, it happens. one thing ive learned is that after every breakup i feel like i wont find someone else. key word there is "feel" because its simply not true. i always meet someone else....its just a matter of when, not if. you will too.

This is going to sound corny, but I didn't fully start to heal until I removed my EX from myspace. I even blocked her profile AND email. Hardest thing I ever did, but I'm thankful I did that now. My recovery is going much smoother and faster than I would have ever expected.

This is going to sound corny, but I didn't fully start to heal until I removed my EX from myspace. I even blocked her profile AND email. Hardest thing I ever did, but I'm thankful I did that now. My recovery is going much smoother and faster than I would have ever expected.

Interesting. How did you get the courage to do that? And, how long into the breakup was it? Have you ever talked to her again?

This is going to sound corny, but I didn't fully start to heal until I removed my EX from myspace. I even blocked her profile AND email. Hardest thing I ever did, but I'm thankful I did that now. My recovery is going much smoother and faster than I would have ever expected.

nothing wrong with doing that either, if thats what you need to do

Hey, I had the exact same situation. The day after she broke up with me she changed her status to 'single', removed a thing on her blog that said she had an 'amazing boyfriend' to say 'recently single, YES!' and she moved me way down her friends list. She also removed any pictures hse had of me that were showing and all references to me. Really crushing to see that.

Anyway, I kept her as a friend for a few weeks, then deleted her. It was the hardest, but best thing I did. Felt great and made me feel stronger or like a load was lifted from me, hard to explain, but Im happy I did it.

Anyway, I kept her as a friend for a few weeks, then deleted her. It was the hardest, but best thing I did. Felt great and made me feel stronger or like a load was lifted from me, hard to explain, but Im happy I did it.

I just don't know how to get that strength. Did you ever hear from her after you did that? Also, how long has it been? And, do you ever check out her profile still?

I just don't know how to get that strength. Did you ever hear from her after you did that? Also, how long has it been? And, do you ever check out her profile still?

Yea, it was horrible doing it. But I knew I wouldnt be able to resist temptation to check it and that it would constantly make me think 'what if... ' or just aggrevate me that she got over me so easily and fast, especially if I checked it and saw she had a new boyfriend. At that point when I deleted it, it had been about 4 or 5 weeks into the break up, which lasted 2 months. I didnt check it at all after I deleted it, mainly for fear of seeing she haad a new boyfriend to be honest.

Anyway, 6 days ago she came back to me and asked me to get back with her. I said yes, but now I regret it because after seeing how cold she was towards me in the time after we broke up and so on, I dont trust her and I dont think I love her anymore, but Id regret not getting back with her, even though I kinda know its doomed to fail again.... so messed up... But, I dont know why she came back, it coulda been the fact I deleted her and had no contact with her maybe rather than trying the friends thing, I honestly dont know

you should stay away from myspace. like everyone is telling you it is EVIL!

Here's an interesting question relating to this topic...

What about their friends who are your friends on MySpace? I have several of the "somewhat ex" (supposed to have THE TALK tonight or tomorrow, he continues to insist we are not broken up but merely living apart) friends and family on there. If he and I remain split, I will most likely not talk to or see them again so it seems common sense to delete them.

On the other hand..I wouldn't want them to think I'm doing it because I dislike them or that I'm being petty.

Assuming THE TALK ends with us officially breaking up, and I believe it will, should I delete them or keep them on my friends list?

Here's an interesting question relating to this topic...

 

What about their friends who are your friends on MySpace? I have several of the "somewhat ex" (supposed to have THE TALK tonight or tomorrow, he continues to insist we are not broken up but merely living apart) friends and family on there. If he and I remain split, I will most likely not talk to or see them again so it seems common sense to delete them.

 

On the other hand..I wouldn't want them to think I'm doing it because I dislike them or that I'm being petty.

 

Assuming THE TALK ends with us officially breaking up, and I believe it will, should I delete them or keep them on my friends list?

Interesting. I started this, and have input based on my story. I only had her and one of her friends on there. I still have her, and her one friend actually deleted me in the first week -- it hurt my feelings, but I'm over it now. She still has me as a friend, my sister as a friend, and my old roommate as a friend. She never deleted any of them. If you are going to delete any of them, do them all. If you are going to keep them up there, keep the others as well. MySpace can be hurtful -- the Internet is great and horrible sometimes...

I am going to be honest and say that my ex is my friend on myspace and I DO put pics up that I think I look really good in hoping to get his attention.. I know its silly but I do it.If I have an awsome photo shoot or I wore a really hot outfit and had a lot of fun that night. You better believe I put those on there just so he can see what he's missing. I know its childish!! So you never can tell.. But Yeah stay away from her profile! Haha!

^Trust me you're not the only one. I'm sure loads of people DO do just that. I'm lucky that my ex always refused to get a MySpace, lol. Because I know I'd be obsessivley checking it! He knows I have one but never gave the link (never needed to) so unless he searches me by name, he won't be able to see my sh!t either