Cannon Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 The thread title is kinda misleading because I'm currently broken up with my ex. I broke up with her because she grew distant and I could tell her mind wasn't on me anymore. Though, as I continue to ask her what went wrong...she always says something about her family and that she's been stressed. She doesn't know I have good information from elsewhere that she's been messing around with my former roommate! If I'm a betting man, I'd say THAT has more to do with why she grew distant as opposed to her family situation. But she's not mentioning that, she's only telling me one side of the story. So my question is...why? Why not just tell me she met someone else (someone I THOUGHT was a friend) and be done with it? Link to comment
Zackinlaw Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 I don't know ... maybe she felt too guilty, maybe she wanted to spare your feelings. If her affection for you dropped off very quickly and there was not a family crisis of some kind, I wouldn't take your bet unless you gave me long odds. Zack. Link to comment
Working Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 Did I understand that you broke up with your EX...so it was your decision. Why bother then with what had been happening on her side? Further, why not just accept what she says as truth. Are you so convinced that she was cheating on your? And even if she was, what difference does it make? Again, you broke up with her. If she did cheat, then its her business and hers to live with. Leave it alone and get on with your life. There is nothing to prove here. Link to comment
Cannon Posted December 1, 2007 Author Share Posted December 1, 2007 Did I understand that you broke up with your EX...so it was your decision. Why bother then with what had been happening on her side? Further, why not just accept what she says as truth. Are you so convinced that she was cheating on your? And even if she was, what difference does it make? Again, you broke up with her. If she did cheat, then its her business and hers to live with. Leave it alone and get on with your life. There is nothing to prove here. No...I KNOW she had real family problems. But I also KNOW that wasn't the sole reason for why she grew distant because I know people that are close to her that have pretty much told me that in so many words (her friends). I broke up with her because I didn't want it to happen the other way around (which I felt was on the verge of happening anyway). It's not like I wanted to though. Plus, she has a Facebook and Myspace profile and on both it still says that she's in a relationship and she's never changed it since we broke up. So I know that it was someone else who got involved. I just want her to level with me and be honest about it. Link to comment
Working Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 I understand its painful for you...particularly since you didn't want to break up. But you did...and while you may want an honest answer from her...it sounds like you are just going to have to accept that she is unwilling to give you one. Link to comment
Timebandit Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 Leave her be. She does not owe you an explanation, and frankly, you can't use an explanation for much. Accept, and move on. Link to comment
CarnelianButterfly Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 You broke up with her without ever knowing if she cheated, you had a hunch, but did you ever confront her? If not, then get over it, you dumped her on a hunch, she owes you no explanation. Link to comment
Cannon Posted December 1, 2007 Author Share Posted December 1, 2007 Leave her be. She does not owe you an explanation, and frankly, you can't use an explanation for much. Accept, and move on. I slightly disagree. This woman told me she loved me, wrote me a nice little love poem and everything. Besides, we were supposed to be in a serious, long term relationship. I don't think I'm wrong for wanting an honest answer...but of course I can't force her to do anything. I believe the people who told me it was my former roommate...so it was more than just some little hunch that I broke up with her. I guess I'm just lost as to why she can't be honest with me and tell me why she lost interest. But I am moving on... Link to comment
Ampire Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 The thread title is kinda misleading because I'm currently broken up with my ex. I broke up with her because she grew distant and I could tell her mind wasn't on me anymore. Though, as I continue to ask her what went wrong...she always says something about her family and that she's been stressed. She doesn't know I have good information from elsewhere that she's been messing around with my former roommate! If I'm a betting man, I'd say THAT has more to do with why she grew distant as opposed to her family situation. But she's not mentioning that, she's only telling me one side of the story. So my question is...why? Why not just tell me she met someone else (someone I THOUGHT was a friend) and be done with it? unless you have real proof then there is no reason to think that, people can grow distant from each other so as simple as a reason as falling out of love, there are sooooooo many reasons why this can happen... bottom line is you broke up with her, on a hunch, so you have no choice but to accept that...if she broke up with you, ok harass the hell outta her until you get an answer, but it was the other way around. Link to comment
Cannon Posted December 1, 2007 Author Share Posted December 1, 2007 Just so you guys know...I'm in college and this is happening on campus. Link to comment
doyathink Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 Lets say you're right, and she cheated. Cheaters rarely admit they cheated...that's why she wont tell you she did. Most ppl will tell you to listen to your gut. If your gut tells you something is up...then listen to it. Sorry to hear it was with your roommate...that is low! Link to comment
tylercdurden2004 Posted December 1, 2007 Share Posted December 1, 2007 No...I KNOW she had real family problems. But I also KNOW that wasn't the sole reason for why she grew distant because I know people that are close to her that have pretty much told me that in so many words (her friends). I broke up with her because I didn't want it to happen the other way around (which I felt was on the verge of happening anyway). It's not like I wanted to though. Plus, she has a Facebook and Myspace profile and on both it still says that she's in a relationship and she's never changed it since we broke up. So I know that it was someone else who got involved. I just want her to level with me and be honest about it. If you have solid information that she cheated on you confront her with it. See what she says. Having said that if you know she cheated on you it doesnt matter really what she tells you. Its over. But on the issue of breaking up with for family reasons. I call BS. People do not break up with people simply because they have family problems. If that was the case then very few relationships would last. People endure and support each other through all sorts of stuff. I hear this carp all the time about breaking up with someone for some petty excuse or another. Simply put it is what it is, An excuse. She didnt feel attracted to you, wanted to break up with you, and didnt respect you enough to say it. Its an excuse. Be glad you are not with her and dont have to endure a lifetime of garbage excuses. Link to comment
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