am a girl i love another girl!1

I am new to this forum and have gone thru many of them n have really appreciated the help given..

Now for my story,I am 25/F in a health proffesion and have noticed that I may be in love with this girl who is 24.Heres the story..

Well I was working at my workplace when one day I came to know a new girl has joined...of course many join n leave but sumhow she was diff..at first I asked her where she was from n we both came to know that we shared the same university...both of us were in the USA for quite sumtime..(I am currently in another country outside the US )...so this kinda got me talking to her... n we shared alot of interests together...specially the US talks....during breaktime we oftern were together...n shared alot of eye contacts ...jokes ...goofiness...sumhow i have got a postive vibe from her...

well this was in march 07 after which both of us left workplace...we sms each other frequently....call each other n talk alot atleast like for half n hour...

lets call her M... well M, myself n other friends(girls )have met up alot..n M is always the closest to me...as in talknig freely joking...etc...

after that its jus the two of us who keep meeting up...at malls,or jus to have cofee..( well once i got angry coz no one had time to meet up n i told M "i look like a fool trying to get other friends to meet n in the end no one plans n stuff"

to which she replied...dnt worry u dnt have to look like a fool when im there! neways if theres no one, we both can meet up"

we meet like at 2pm sit n talk till like 8pm alooot with lotsa eye contact...n she even touches me frequently..on my arm..if we are eating she brushes off sum food bits from my face...or my hand...hmmm n i have even seen her staring at other pretty girls who pass by...wehn we were window shopping i have even seen her looking at me (once at my neck)....

she is really comfortable with me n so am i n we both love to meet each other...n most of the times i have noticed her bringing up topics of relationships like-"hey u know wat everyone i see are going around...how come we dnt have anyone...?" n so i too talk n tell her stuff like there were a couple of guys after me.but i didnt want any of them coz they were weird or like its jus that coz everyone goes around u feel like it too... i believe in true love...n it should be for sumone special.." n shes like yeah....n she has asked me like 3 times why i refused going around with the guys who fell for me...she is really practical n once mentioned.".i would rather be happy n enjoying my life alone then get into sumthing or marriage where i amy get sumtihng a standard below of what i live now in happiness"

she doesnt even like seeing other couples(heterosexual) making out in public(PDA) n finds it gross...once when we were sitting there was a couple making out behind us..n she cudnt take it n shes like "o god...can u please come n sit here in my place lets switch seats"...

she has even mentioned television dramas like BROTHERS N SISTERS (involving a gay man)..n said.."hey do u watch the tv show?" or " hey u know neil patrick harris(fom DOOGIE HOWSER) is gay...n im like "yeah!! i know he is ..."

every two days if i dnt messsage her she would message like hey wat u doin or stuff..etc...

yesterday she message me if i was intereste in going for a movie..

i assume that she has interest in me...even i am attracted to her...n always fumble around her...

WHAT DO U THINK I SHOULD DO????..i am in a country where anything besides heterosexuality is considered abnormal...m scared to approach her...coz a similar thing has happened before but the girl i liked was not so free in her expressions n was i think straight but still gave sum signs well not like how M gives...but i think she was a homophobe... i really like M...

I think you should tread carefully. It sounds like she's hetero tbh.

hmmmmmmm yes...im really careful....we are actually jus really close friens as for now....but u know when u sense sumtihng...maybe a gaydar sorts....she never mentions guys..btw..

possibly bring up that you are "bi curious" (whether you are curious or actually gay is not important) because all you want to see is her reaction. Obviously if sh e says "so am I" or "I'm gay" then you know what to do from there. If she reacts any differently then that then you can assume she is not and you should probably not bring it up again because you may scare her off.

I think differently... I think I got a vibe when I was reading, she doesn't sound much like a hetero. Especially if she never mentions men or any guys she's into. Could well be a lesbian; especially if she has never been with a guy while the two of you have been friends...

I think you should talk to her and try to find out her orientation; like ask subtle questions like if she is into anyone; what her veiws on homosexuality is...

Be careful not to rush into anything though. I could be wrong about the 'vibe' and it could scare her away...But first and foremost just be a good friend, friends are worth a lot more that anything else =D And you don't wanna risk losing it, if your wrong about her

hmmmmm... i feel the initiation is from her part...i mean... i jus cant bring up the bicurious part... its too scary...this week we are meeting up for a movie...that she asked me..

I think you should talk to her and try to find out her orientation; like ask subtle questions like if she is into anyone; what her veiws on homosexuality is...

 

^ this would be a good way to do it

I agree. Would be a good way.

hmmm yeah i would try that....i mean ill ask her if she likes the hero of the movie(that we will see).. n initiate sumthing on that... who she likes n all.. till date shes the one who has asked me...but never in a way most girls would...like...ohhhhh tell me about that guy who liked u n all...it would jus be cool n jus tilll she knew theres nothing dats gna happen for theguy n me...

i have been in a similar situation where i loved a girl so much maybe for like 4 years n more ..n she flirted with me sooo much...n it clearley showed her love...but in the end she never said if she liked me..a homophobe i guess... i dnt want sumtihng like this happenig again...but this gal M is really more open n expressive.. we have sooo much in common..twins i would say...sumtimes when we meet online n incase she got disconnected she would be soo angry at the computer...n message stuff to me like cmon this is * * * *!!! i am like so irritated..each time we meet online y does this happen n so on...lets see how she acts the day i meet her at the movies..coz i have been thru sumthing like this n have got very strong vibes..but then again u never know..hm hm

Dont worry about it too much

just go to the movie and see what happened and what is said ect.

just keep us posted on what happens... we are a rather helpful bunch usually

I think differently... I think I got a vibe when I was reading, she doesn't sound much like a hetero. Especially if she never mentions men or any guys she's into. Could well be a lesbian; especially if she has never been with a guy while the two of you have been friends...

 

I think you should talk to her and try to find out her orientation; like ask subtle questions like if she is into anyone; what her veiws on homosexuality is...

 

Be careful not to rush into anything though. I could be wrong about the 'vibe' and it could scare her away...But first and foremost just be a good friend, friends are worth a lot more that anything else =D And you don't wanna risk losing it, if your wrong about her

I got a vibe too, and i just read another post last night similar and dnd't get that vibe at all.

This one i do. I think there might be something on this girl's mind. But yes, tread very carefully just in case.

yeah ill tread carefully.......feel glad i can finally open up my heart with all my doubts on this forum..with really helpful people...thanks to all....will surely keep an update of whats goin on....

I third the "I got a good vibe" and I third the "tread carefully."

I think she sounds like she's attracted to you and that there's a strong emotional connection.

Whether she's ready to go there is an important question.

My advice (if you're up for it) is if you're ever on the topic of crushes, to mention the girl you used to like. I think that's a really non confrontational way of letting her know you like girls without her feeling anything directed at her. Saying you're 'bi curious' is just too much. If you've already dug yourselves into holes by implying to each other that you were straight, you can always use the 'who would you turn gay for?' thing (you know, while looking at a magazine or something).

anyway, just some ideas. Hope it's of some help?

Think that's a really non confrontational way of letting her know you like girls without her feeling anything directed at her.

I think this is an excellent way too take a first step; and probably your safest bet for the miniute. Saying something like your Bi/Bi-curious I think would be a bit of a shock on the situation; for both of you...

Anyways good luck

oooo i forgot to mention her birthday was there today!! n the other day i sent her a text saying happy bday(to tease her a bit when her bday is actually today) n she was like "" oh god u have gone crazy wishing me again n again when its not my bday..but its fun!...i hope u dnt actually forget the real date"!! by the way dare if u jus send me an sms i expect u to call me now that u have a reason to call(bday)! got it?"

so we are mostly meeting up this week...for a movie(finally)

what do u all think i should gift her?

gift-wise... something small and meaningful, and not to expensive, that nots me bieng cheap its just if you give her a 1000dollar watch she'll be like 'what the..' and it would be weird..

Have fun at the movie and make sure and call her on her birthday; you do now have a reason haha

im in a verrry similar boat, with my Best friend, for her birthday iv just got her a bracelet iv had engraved with Best friend, nice touch nothin too expensive, but shows how much i cherish her friendship.

im so sorry guys i jus faded away but i was a bit busy with my stuff.. neways ...so yes i gifted her a small statue of a laughing buddha...before i gave it to her she wasl iek ohhhh u got me sumtihng wat is it????n was really excited..that day we went to the movies andd saw a romantic comedy movie and she was well quiet thruout(guessing she was into the movie

AFTER THAT WE HAVE MET ALOT..for the first time she came over to my place too...n while walking n crossing the road over to my place I held her hand and even playfully have grabbed her neck a couple of times.. shes at my place and most of her questions were directed at like finding out about ME.And she had got a CD full of pictures of herself n her friends(girls) that she wanted to show me..

She was excited and happy to show me her pictures way back from college days an explaining each and every minute detail Did I mention we love to joke around ..i guess shes never seen the vulnerable sad side of me even thou im really emotional when it comes to love and stand up for true love.

I showed her pics of a few guys who love me and are hitting on me on my PC...and shes like hey show me! show me!! iwanna see who likes u!!(i felt kinda good coz usually u know if u like her ..u will want to know who are the other people who also love her andd wat she thinks bout em..I evne once smsed her saying im getting engaged..and she sent me bak a text saying"what?what STUPID message are u sending me?" of course i told her later i wasnt..lolz

So THERE WAS THIS SONG PLAYING..WHICH I REMEMBERD A ROMANTIC ONE AND I WAS LIEK OHH NO ..UMM I LOVE THIS SONG BUT CRY EACH TIME I HEAR IT..so she was like why?" i was like "um no u mnothing well.."(the song used to paly when i was in love with another girl,but now shes outta my life) And she really badly wanted to know WHAT made me sad for the romantic song...And then shes like "if u dont tell me that means we are not close and that would be an insult to our friendship"..

So in between we have called each other alooottt were on msn, yahoo. i guess all over the internet..and now we are decieding for a masters degree to educate ourselves more on our career.When i told her im applying to this state in US ..she wasl iek umm hey how come ur not applying here(her choice)..im like umm lets see..SHE SEEMED KEEN ON JOINING TOGEHTER...

This week she invited me for another romantic movie..and was like hey im bored u wanna see a movie?She has alot of female friends but she hasnt invited them..but told me "lets see the movie together"

I havent yet jumped into anything as we were kinda busy n havent met much after her bday..but m looking forward to the movies!!

O by the way we had a topic on marriage..since many of our friends(hetero)are getting married and stuff..so she was like "my god one after the other everynoes getting married.."so i was like .."yeah so u too get married(jokingly)..and she was like WHATTTT NOOOOOOOO WAYSSS..i cant even picture myself for a long time" ( phew!

She seems really practical in life and loves the way i enjoy life with my jokes and smiles not worrying much etc..(but deep down inside im emotional but i never show it)

Lets see wat happens this week if we go for yet another movie..i look forward to really flirting a bit as i did before too...so long im happily going along not really expecting much but yes..really loving her and caring for her..and I have never been happier in my lifeLets see how the movies go!!!

you should go see a scary movie with her so you have a reason to hold her hand.

awwwwww yeah ur right..LOVES ENEMY..arghh but theres no scary movie out past couple of weeks..btw i loveeeee scary movies even thou i get * * * * scared!!!lolzzz...

I used to hate watching scary movies in theaters...because I tend to scream quite loud... but it is probably the best excuse for holding someone you like's hand. That's what started my friend and I to becoming closer.... a lot closer... . Once a good scary movie is out, give it a try.

hehe i hope sum scary flick is out sooner or later...

yesterday we met online,and as usual chatting along,irritating each other in a flirty sort a way and i love irritating her alot (she too mention online-I LIKE IT WHEN U R ON THE OTHER SIDE(IRRITATED)..FEELS GOOD TO IRRITATE U..we mentions a bit of dirty jokes too..lolzzz taking the double meaning of watever we can find ..sudnely she went offline(her comp hanged) and she texted back saying ..DAM THE COMP HANGED ...arghhh it always happens when we meet onlnie lolzz

Her txting you about her computer crashing is a good sign. If she txts you back pretty much immediately it means she doesn't want you to think she signed off on you and she wants to make sure you know that. If I was talking to just a friend and my computer crashed, I might tell them online later, or if we were in the middle of a conversation, I would eventually txt them. It wouldn't be my main priority unless I actually liked them.

Just stay close with her and keep talking. Sometimes amazing things can happen. If you want something bad enough, you'll get it. I learned that in these past few months.

So,today as i said we both are appying for our masters degree,i got in a univ in a diff state even she.. but its oki distance doesnt matter..i texted her saying .."awww man now i wont get to bug u like 24 hours..seriously but ill mis u...even thou i know we will be meeting" So she replies back.."im really feeling bad even i was thinking dat i have another few more years to bug u too but i can come to visit u n bug u too!!"

Now i have a friend lets call her ms.B(well ms.B is kindda busty u can say a D size),so shes my good friend,and ms.B and i may get in to the same university..so even my love knows thats shes kinda busty..so we kinda keep joknig around wrt her size when we are alone..(my love jokes around alot for breasts sumhow)

so today after i texted her saying that i and ms.B might go tothe same univ together she texts back "same here even ill miss u now u will have the chance to admire ms.B's boobs.Who knows may be admiring them may have sum effect on your's a size B)..

My love n and talk real dirty sumtiems when we are onlnie or even in person..so we are meeting up this week..m gna give her a tight hug once i meet her for our admissions...