Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 30

Thread: whats worse cheating or lying?

  1. #1
    PersonalMe
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    120
    Gender
    Female

    Exclamation whats worse cheating or lying?

    ok...as to not take sides...heres a scenario..tell me what you think...

    its a relationship of A and B...theyve been together for 2 years in a long distance relationship, its been fine until now, they see each other every so often, but enough, and they both really love each other. A cheated on B...(had intercourse with X) in the summer, and lets B know this a few weeks ago. B accepts it, of course B is angry and frustarted at the fact of what A did, but thinks they can get through it. B starts being a bit rude, B is angry with A, saying A is mean, and a hypocryte, and that A lies and its bad because A never told B what happened. few days pass, and things are rough, both probably feel like sh*t...THEN...B says "i think i needed to tell you this, but i cheated too in june" (kissing with Y)...A says its horrible what B did because now who is the hypocyte and liar?

    so whos worse? i understand cheating wise, obviously A right? logical. but what about lying and keeping it in for longer? does comunication not matter? or is physical cheating worse than lying about cheating? im confused...
    please dont relate this to boy or girl, or good or bad...just please tell me what you think.

  2. #2
    HappyAsALark
    Platinum Member HappyAsALark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    The Burg
    Age
    32
    Posts
    999
    Gender
    Female
    To be honest, I would rather be with someone that cheats that tells me about it, than with someone who lies to me constantly. I mean, really, I wouldn't be with either, but if I HAD to choose, I would choose the honest cheater.

  3. #3
    IronLion85
    Gold Member IronLion85's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Orange County, CA
    Age
    32
    Posts
    1,490
    Gender
    Male
    I think it's less of a big deal to keep kissing someone a secret than having intercourse and coming clean with it. I think any kind of cheating is horrible, obviously, but there's differences in severity. A kiss is pretty minor compared to sex...

  4. #4
    PinkRoses
    Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    91
    Gender
    Female
    If my boyfriend/husband cheated on me and told me lets just say a day or so after he had, i would be more likely to forgive him then had i found out on my own. He may have waited a day or so but at least he was honest and i didn't find out any other way.
    I wouldn't want either but to me it would be easier to forgive him for it, if he told me.

  5. #5
    glegend
    Gold Member glegend's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Toronto, Ontario, Canada
    Age
    28
    Posts
    2,662
    Gender
    Male
    Well the both of them cheated, on each other. The one that one cheated by kissing is way better then the one who had sexual relations with another person. They both kept it in. One finally confessed, which is good. Confessing your sins is better then keeping it in and finding out the hard way. Its better to cheat and just tell the person instead of cheating and lying about it. Its better to be with the person who is open about it rather then the one that just hides it.
    In the end once a cheater may always be a cheater, to stay with that person its a bit of a gamble. The person cheated at one point or another during a relationship with someone, that person is vonerable to do it again. Now if the person chooses to do it or not then thats a different story. Its like a theif, and when employers ask "if someone was stealing from the store should he or she be fired?". The answer is yes, cause they were stealing for one reason or the other and they may do it again or they may stop but the company cannot take the risk. So its like the same principals for cheating.

  6. #6
    MissTee
    Silver Member MissTee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Sydney, Australia
    Posts
    357
    They're as bad as eachother.

    I would feel betrayed either way.

  7. #7
    PersonalMe
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    120
    Gender
    Female
    Quote Originally Posted by glegend [Register to see the link]
    "if someone was stealing from the store should he or she be fired?". The answer is yes, cause they were stealing for one reason or the other and they may do it again or they may stop but the company cannot take the risk.
    hmm i like this comparison about the store...THOUGH...dont you think (and this depends obviously ALOT on the person) that if the person stole, got in trouble for it, maybe even jail for days or whatever...depending on the crime...dont you think when they got out, or finished with the punishment, they would know not to do it again? SOME PUNISHMENTS r tough!
    and in this case of cheating, they both (both=this is almost like if the manager stole right?) did it and understood it was wrong, got punishment, and i think they have both learned. so Although very hard to do, and maybe not always convinient, do you still think there is a chance? they ARE just people, with feelings, who do love each other...do u think there is still a posibility that there is something there?

  8. #8
    Weeblie
    Gold Member Weeblie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    land of eternal sunshine
    Age
    36
    Posts
    990
    Gender
    Female
    A and B both suck.

    Didn't they both lie? Didn't they both cheat? Didn't they both tell the truth? I think the real issue isn't about what's worse, it's why they felt the need to cheat in the first place. If they want things to work out, then they need to address that part of their relationship. Probably need to work on the communication thing too, since they waited so long to tell the truth.

  9. #9
    littlestar
    Platinum Member littlestar's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Somewhere in the world.
    Age
    34
    Posts
    3,572
    Gender
    Female
    Cheating involves lying and betrayl, there isnt such a thing as honest cheating. They are as worse as each other.
    Cheating on someone and telling them you did it, doesnt make it any better than cheating on someone and lying about it or not telling them about it.

  10. #10
    JadedStar
    JadedStar's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    On a star far, far away...
    Posts
    16,141
    I think A and B are playing a game of t i t for tat and they are both wrong. Neither have been honest or trustworthy. I would not say one is better than the other because neither are charecteristic of a loving and committed relationship.

    I'd say A and B need to rethink what they are looking for because mistrust like this suggests neither was fulfilled in their relationship or either are just not very trustworthy people.

    Both lied. One just lied AND slept with another person. It is interesting that A and B would be more concerned over who committed the deeper wrong than why those wrongs were committed in the first place.

  11.  

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Top Threads
Husband acted inappropriately towards my best friend... What do I do?
Hi everyone, I've got a bit of a complicated situation that I need some advice about. Long story short, I had been dating my now husband since 2014
do you believe in soul mates?
So, this is a long one. Iíve been dating this guy for 3 years, we broke up after the first year because we just werenít on the same page. To be
Is this the right thing to do?
So there are two couples and the male in one relationship, let's call him bob, and the female in the other, let's call her stacy had sent flirtatious
One day alive. Maybe.
I looked into a girl when I was about 15 I guess. It was unrequited. Gave up on love. Went to college, and in my first year got connected with a
Ex wife dumped me but it seems to be struggling
We had been together since 2011 and married early 2013. We have a house, she has been unemployed all this time but i took very good care of her and
Featured Threads
Moving in together with my almost one year boyfriend but one big issue
Dear All, I haven't been back here for a while now. I have decided to post here instead than in the "pets" section, because I didn't want to
Back from the holidays: waiting for him to contact me
I am back form my holidays. I went away three weeks. We had two great dates before I went away. During the holidays we texted a few times, the
Should I do it?
Maybe itís because Iím such a nostalgic person, Itís going to be a full year since our breakup las January. I still think about her every f*cking day
He chose his lodgers side so I broke up with him but still love him
I just broke up with my boyfriend of one year because 4 months ago he let a friend move into his house with him she asked him ,and in turn he asked
Feeling unsure after 4 years and before marriage
Me and my fiancť are together for 4 years now, both in our mid 30s, had an engagement not long ago. We live in [B]MY [/B] apartment. I feel
Broke up with gf
So back story 4 months into the relationship. She knows about while she hasn't met my friends she knows of them. I know not much about her past. I
Girlfriend having abortion and says she needs time to herself. What do I do?
Hello, this is my first post in this forum and I am struggling and need a lot of help. 2 weeks ago my girlfriend found out she was pregnant, we are
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •