My Girlfriend Has Bad Hygiene...How Do I Tell Her?

We have been together for a year now. We are both in our mid-late 20's. I love her very much but there is one problem. She has bad hygiene. She wonders why I dont want to be intimate with her sometimes and it really hurts me. She is very attractive. Ive been watching her and shell go 1-2-3 days without a shower. HOW DO I TELL HER!?! I dont want to hurt her feelings at all. Someone please give me some advice! &

There is probably no easy way to tell her something like that. Perhaps you could initiate a shower together.

Has she always been like this?

No she has not always been like this I dont think. Its been the past several months. I have showered with her.

I agree. Just be honest. Is there a reason why she goes days withouth showering?

Is she under stress or have some major change in her routine?

Sometimes people let theimselves go when they're preoccupied by problems.

She is very busy with work, kid and us. I am also busy but I shower at least 1-2 times a day...this is tough!

I'm sorry you are going through this. It must be hard for you, you love her, want to be intimate but are turned off..... Are there underlying factors involved here like maybe depression?

I am really trying to think of a way you could approach this, but nothing is coming to mind that probably won't hurt her feelings one way or another.

Ok, how about this. You say she is busy with the kids and work. Maybe you could go to one of those Bath and Body stores and get her a nice gift basket with pretty smelling oils and soaps tell her she should just take a little breather and have a nice hot bubble bath. That is something you could also indulge in with her.

why not try making a shower (or bath) together a regular part of your intimate routine??? scrubbing her back, and then letting your hands wander is good foreplay for both of you!!!

Maybe she is depressed? She/We have a lot on our plate. I need to talk to her about being depressed...I hope she isnt. WOW this is getting heavier than I thought it would.

I have done that. This also carries in to life. She goes to work like this. Its not just me. I dont want people to look at her differently. She is a good person and stood by me through some hard times. I just want her back to the way she was.

I would tell her that you are really turned on by a fresh, just-out-of-the-shower smell.

Maybe it will encourage her to shower daily.

I would tell her that you are really turned on by a fresh, just-out-of-the-shower smell.

 

 

Maybe it will encourage her to shower daily.

Ill definitely try that...thank you

why not try making a shower (or bath) together a regular part of your intimate routine??? scrubbing her back, and then letting your hands wander is good foreplay for both of you!!!

I have done that. This also carries in to life. She goes to work like this. Its not just me. I dont want people to look at her differently. She is a good person and stood by me through some hard times. I just want her back to the way she was.

I agree with the posters who suggest depression. One of the first things to go is personal hygiene. She sounds very stressed out. Is there any way you can help her out with her chores or kids?

Showering together is also a great way to make sure that she takes a shower and has fun.

I agree with the posters who suggest depression. One of the first things to go is personal hygiene. She sounds very stressed out. Is there any way you can help her out with her chores or kids?

 

Showering together is also a great way to make sure that she takes a shower and has fun.

Really thats interesting. I can and do help her with the kids and chores. I will do more then.

I agree. Just be honest. Is there a reason why she goes days withouth showering?

She is probably depressed. Everyone has me sold on this.

I would tell her that you are really turned on by a fresh, just-out-of-the-shower smell.

 

 

Maybe it will encourage her to shower daily.

Thank you

I wouldn't come right out and tell her you think she's depressed or that she smells.

Instead maybe say something like "I've been noticing that you've been letting yourself go lately, you aren't taking care of yourself like you used to, would you like to talk about something?"

If she asks what you mean, just say that you notice she doesn't shower as often as she used to and you wonder why she's not putting in the effort like she used to, and that she seems really stressed lately.

This could lead to something.. Most people who used to shower daily don't just stop showering for days at a time for no reason.

Maybe she is depressed? She/We have a lot on our plate. I need to talk to her about being depressed...I hope she isnt. WOW this is getting heavier than I thought it would.

I think you have answered your own question. That was my first thought as well. It a bit abnormal when you find a woman who doesnt want to groom herself and it usually stems from being depressed or otherwise traumatic event. Even at our busiest, a woman always has time for a shower, at the very least.

Showering together is also a great way to make sure that she takes a shower and has fun.

I would tell her that you are really turned on by a fresh, just-out-of-the-shower smell.

While I agree with the above two comments, I have to mention that you shouldnt have to trick her into taking a shower. You have to find out the cause of all of this, and try to help her fix it at its source instead of finding ways to cope with her behaviour. While I understand honesty might embarrass in this situation, there is a tactful way you can say it, and bring the source of the behaviour out in the open so you both can be on your way to fixing it instead of covering it up.

How about preparing a bath for her when she gets home? You know, get some candles, some wine, get the bubble bath going.....I am sure she won't say no to that.

I'd probably go ahead and hurt her feelings and tell her she needs to shower.

If elaborate subtle gestures worked, they would have worked by now. She should be strong enough to get over it. If there are other underlying issues, I'd probably still tell her to shower first. That way I could get close enough to talk to her about the other stuff.