Do men and women treat weight differently?

Hi guys,

Ok, not too sure if this is the right place to post or not, but here goes. Some friends and I were watching that ‘biggest loser’ show on TV a couple of nights ago. A couple of my male friends were making fun of the female contestants weight, e.g what a pig, or how could she let herself get that bad. But only made fun of the female’s not the males (not making it ok btw). Now my male friends are quite overweight themselves. After the show I saw a beer commercial, were the female was really slim and she was looking into the mirror and seeing herself overweight, while a guy was overweight and was looking into a mirror and saw himself really buff.

This has got me wondering…

Now I am not talking about obesity or anything like that, but around 15-20kg overweight. If a guy is overweight does it really bother him? A lot of guys I know don’t seem to care and either pretend that they are still hot stuff and flaunt that they don’t need to be fit (e.g. eating a whole bag of chips and saying they don’t need to watch their weight). And from what I see women are not too bothered by overweight guys, but guys are bothered by overweight women (even if the guys are overweight themselves)

So I have a couple of questions:

If you are dating a person who is fit at the start of the relationship but lets themselves go and puts on weight, would you be less attracted to them?

If you started dating someone who was overweight, but you were fit would you try and change them?

If you entered a relationship and you were both overweight, but you got fit again, would you expect you partner to also do the same?

Any answers??

I like a girl with a bit of meat on her bones...more to love.

As for myself, I am on a diet. I gained ALOT my last semester at college because of schedules and not eating right. But I'm eating better and getting some daily exercise and its starting to pay off.

That being said, I DON'T want six-pack abs or muscles like Ahnuld. I just want to be healthier. My only goal is to achive a weight of around 190-200..thats all.

Unless your thyroid has exploded there is absolutely no exuse for any male or female not to take care for their bodies and become obese. But reality is also that losing weight is tremendously hard. It takes far more effort then one would initially imagine. And another big disadvantage of the human body is that there is no on or off button on it, so a lot of people have this open system that's constantly hungry. Its really hard to get rid of it, anyway back to your story.

They made fun of the woman and not of the man, because they are afraid to be made fun off themselves. Guys are sensetive too those kind of comments too, but you know your friends are really living in darkness, seeing how they do make fun of other people who are fat, while they are fat themselves.

And yes it is about perception, if you think fat is beautifull , then it is that exactly to you. Most people think its disgusting although they won't say that outloud, but besides of that, its undoubtfully bad for your health, and thus should be avoided. The keyword is balance, you need to ditch weight and come to a healthy amount of weight.

Overweight is litterary a load that makes your life more difficult that you have to carry around always. So its really benefitial if you are lightweighted in a healthy manner.

Muscle = not fat , so that's a different story.

I think a part of the reason why there is such a gender difference is stigma in society. Women are expected to be slim, while men can get away with having some weight on them. This is constantly shown in the media. Think of all the comedy shows out there where there is a skinny gorgeous woman married to an overweight man and no one thinks twice about it. Yet there are no shows with a "buff" guy married to an overweight woman. Media has such an effective on what society perceives as beautiful.

If someone Really let themselves go.... I don't know. I doubt I would be compatible with someone who didn't do any physical activity or likes to eat pizzas and chips all the time. Sometimes people have downtimes, loss of job, death in family, or for whatever reason that would cause a weight gain.

but yes, it would bother me. Its not just about whats on the inside that counts, but if someone gets very overweight, the I don't see what I would have in common with him as I try to do something active once or twice a day.

no I don't think I would be dating someone who was overweight. In order to start doing someone you do have to have some sort of attraction and it wouldn't be there for me initially.

I have never been that overweight.. I've put on a few pounds here and there, but never been overweight , but as I sad above. I don't think I would date someone who is overweight.

Looking after oneself and physical fitness is too important to me

If you are dating a person who is fit at the start of the relationship but lets themselves go and puts on weight, would you be less attracted to them? This actually happened to me. When I met my first boyfriend he was buff and sexy. By the time we broke up he was about 45 lbs heavier. I didn't really notice it because it occurred gradually, but I was not attracted to him physically in the end. That wasn't why we broke up, but you asked.

If you started dating someone who was overweight, but you were fit would you try and change them? I really don't think I would date someone who was overweight now. I don't find it attractive and I highly value fitness and a healthy diet. If for whatever reason, I did find myself dating an overweight guy, I wouldn't try to change him but If he was concerned about his weight then I would probably try to give him some suggestions about what he could do about it.

If you entered a relationship and you were both overweight, but you got fit again, would you expect you partner to also do the same? Hopefully, I will never be overweight. I'm too picky about my appearance. If somehow this does happen, then yes, I would encourage him to make an effort.

I think this is a similar idea to that ad you saw.

heh, yeah that's like the pic. It was for a low carb beer. I reckon that someone should make a tv show where the wife is fat and annoying, while the husband is fit and supporting. Kind of an oposite of the king of queens or the family guy.

I think you are right about the part of my friends being in the dark, next time they make fun of overweight women I will tell them to look at themselves.

heh, yeah that's like the pic. It was for a low carb beer. I reckon that someone should make a tv show where the wife is fat and annoying, while the husband is fit and supporting. Kind of an oposite of the king of queens or the family guy.

 

I think you are right about the part of my friends being in the dark, next time they make fun of overweight women I will tell them to look at themselves.

What about Roseanne? I know that Tom wasn't exactly a picture of perfection, but he was slimmer and more submissive than her.

I was thinking more of a super attractive guy

So I have a couple of questions:

 

If you are dating a person who is fit at the start of the relationship but lets themselves go and puts on weight, would you be less attracted to them?

 

If you started dating someone who was overweight, but you were fit would you try and change them?

 

If you entered a relationship and you were both overweight, but you got fit again, would you expect you partner to also do the same?

 

Any answers??

Definitely yes.

I don't think that would ever be an issue for me. I won't say why though.

Um... probably? I can only guess here. I would probably expect it, but maybe I wouldn't enforce my new-found health on my mate. I don't know. Good question!