Dating etiquette

Am I the last person who notices manners on earth?

What do you not tolerate on a date?

1. no taking phone calls on a date

2. Be on time

what else?

I take phone calls, I have a major paranoia with someone dying and me not being able to say goodbye

but as soon as I know everything is ok I get off the phone.

and no, being late is not ok unless you REALLY cant help it and you get in touch with them and warn them

Am I the last person who notices manners on earth?

What do you not tolerate on a date?

 

1. no taking phone calls on a date

2. Be on time

 

 

what else?

Hey Ash

I count myself as a person with manners, instilled in me by my parents, instilled in them by their parents. I agree that basic manners are becoming less and less apparent these days, but I find that in both younger and older generations although the young get labelled with it more.

I agree with you about being on time, I think that is basic manners for any appointment be it a date, a meeting or otherwise.

I don't have a problem with someone answering the phone, I mean there are more important things in life than a date such as a family emergency. But I figure what you are saying is if a date receives a phone call and stays on that call whilst ignoring you. If that call was just a social call then I would agree with you fully.

i wouldnt like someone to answer the phone during the first few dates. having said that, on my last date i had to answer a expected phone call from my sister who just got out of hospital, but i did ask my date if he was ok with me answering the phone, and i told him why.

if they are just late and dont say why or inform you earlier, i think thats rude.

i know that the guys i have dated have always wanted to pay, (expect for my last boyfriend, who had a hell of alot more money than me but wouldnt pay for a thing or drive anywhere) i feel it rude of me, not to offer for me to pay for something, maybe i pay for movies and he pay for dinner, or i pay the next time.... something like that.

but i think thats about it.

Unless it's an emergency, like a parent or a sibling in the hospital, I think any phone call is unacceptable on a date.

Also I like it when the guy pays, if he has more money that I do. I don't date guys with less money that I have . (I'm unemployed at the moment)

when i was dating my last guy, he worked one job full time, where i worked 5 jobs part time and a full time uni student, he still got more than me and wouldnt pay a thing.... i would drive him to work, pick him up, (that was when i had the time) i would feed him as i lived by myself and he lived with his family... i didnt even get a thanks for anything

ok steff, first step , acknowledge that no one made you do anything. Don't pay for the next guy. Don't drive them to work. And if he isn't really thankful, tell him you need to be thanked.

You have to ask for what you need. He probably thought it was ok with you.

Communicate!

ah well he was a .... so was his dad.... im over it. however it just goes to show what some men are like

As a guy, something that bothers me, is when a girl expects me to pay. I like it when a girl offers even though I will pay anyways.

But above ANYTHING, the thing that bothers me the MOST, is when you go on a first date, and she orders a SALAD........................ sigh. EAT when you go on a date. It shows you are comfortable with yourself if you eat something unhealthy. I mean, don't order the whole menu... but have fun let loose.

I completely agree with you on the phone thing.

Believe it or not, there was a time when people were not always reachable and we got along just fine....even when our cars broke down or there was a work or family emergency. Oh, sure, you had to watch out for the dinosaurs, but other than that.......

I had a work-required cell phone a few years back and I hated it. I don't have one now, and don't have any intentions of ever acquiring one again. I realize there are some people in some professions who really NEED to have something like that, however, for the vast majority of folks cell phones are a "created need" not an actual need.

But on a date? Gives me the impression I'm being squeezed into the too-busy life of a person who won't control who has access to them and when.

one of my biggest pet peeves is people who ask questions or make comments about someone's appearance.

with my ex we were out for dinner once and our waitress had a black eye... and he asked her "oh my.. what happened"

I was taught not to say anything about people's appearances... especially someone you don't know!!

he didn't seem to see how this was incredibly rude!

I don't mind the phone as long as the conversation is quick and the interruptions few. One or two phone calls won't bother me. What would annoy me is a lot of phone calls (in and out) and/or talking for ages abut something that doesn't seem urgent. You're spending time with me right? But if you're having a social call while I am twiddling my thumbs, I might just decide to up and leave you alone with your cell phone!

More rules:

Politeness - cussing, treating the waiter badly and/or being rude to me is not acceptable. If you are in the early stages of dating and you're already doing this, I'm gonna run because once the best-behaviour stage is over, I dont wanna see how bad you get!

Offer to pay - both sexes. I appreciate it when a guy pays for me, but I also know most guys would appreciate it if a girl is grateful or offers to pay for herself (even if he is planning to pay anyways). It just shows that you're there to spend time with the other person, not get a free dinner.

Be on time - Five minutes late, okay, but I'll be miffed unless you have a good reason (traffic is usually a good one 15 minutes late will cost you some points. More than that, I'm pissed off and leaving. If you're late, it indicates that you don't care enough about the date to be on time and you don't care that you're making someone wait and waste his/her time. I make the effort to be on time, even a bit early if needed. I expect the other to do the same.

Treat the waitstaff and any customer service types nicely, hold doors open for me, make it clear that I should order whatever I please if he says he is going to order light for some reason, phone calls only if you tell me in advance you might need to take a call for work, don't lean into the table taking up my part of the table (i.e. at a small cafe table).

Make sure that I can get home safely - either wait with me to get a taxi or offer to walk me home if it's not too far, etc).

Dress appropriately and look neat.

women that have to use the bathroom a lot because of their makeup. lame.

the phone thing is definitely rude if you know you are on a date. if you are just meeting up, ehhh, it's okay.