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Thread: Do You Regret Cheating?

  1. #11
    Bronze Member puppeteer's Avatar
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    thanks antilove...

    personally i don't think anyone can truly say they would "never" cheat...

    i would like to think that i would never cheat, and to date have never done so...

    but life is not absolute and situations can arise to make anyone question their morals and ethics. as i said...temptation is always out there....it's how you deal with it.

    as for not feeling regret, i don't think that is true about you. if you didn't feel any regret over people you've hurt in the past...why be on ENA?

    your heart is more caring than you may give it credit for antilove.

  2. #12
    Bronze Member Cyprian's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by puppeteer
    personally i don't think anyone can truly say they would "never" cheat...
    I think that it might have been possible for me to cheat in the future BEFORE, but now since I have gone through my recent experience, I would NEVER subject any human to this pain...never...

  3. #13
    Platinum Member AntiLove_SuperStar's Avatar
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    Oh, I feel regret. Great big stabs of regret that make me cry and vomit.

    Its mainly all front with me. Of course I care.

  4. #14
    Gold Member cantexplain's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Cyprian
    If you comprehended this all only after following my experience, maybe all I have to do is show the EX all of these posts, and then she will comprehend it as well, without having to (as you posted above) "feel as deep of a love and [] then [be] betrayed - and as in cyprian's case, lied to or misled."
    At the time of my break-up with my first love, I understood and loved her in a way to know that she was hurt. Then later in my life when people abandoned me, I understood even more deeply how much I hurt her. But his was your first love, cyprian, as she and I were one another's first love. Reading your posts, knowing the the pain, empathizing with you, and understanding that you are in the shoes she was - plus after 20 more years of accumulated wisdom - yes, I have a much deeper understanding of what happened to us, and how she must have felt.

    Moreover, I did not cheat on her - so I can barely imagine how you must feel.
    Last edited by cantexplain; 02-09-2007 at 04:10 PM.

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  6. #15
    Gold Member cantexplain's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Cyprian
    I think that it might have been possible for me to cheat in the future BEFORE, but now since I have gone through my recent experience, I would NEVER subject any human to this pain...never...
    Yes I can say I would never cheat. If I even thought of it I'd do a great big 180 back to my mate and examine what is wrong - work on it - if I couldn't fix it in me, or us in us, then I'd break it off and then pursue my next love interest. She could rest assuredly that I have not ever tasted this cheating thing. And I could look her in the eye and say "I would never, ever cheat on you." I think this is a great thing to be able to take into a relationship.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member mrmaximum's Avatar
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    Yes, that is the truth

    Originally Posted by puppeteer
    because on some weird level, as i am discovering with my ex-wife, they would be perfectly happy if you stayed miserable and alone, pining after them for the rest of your life.

    they made the choice because they seem to think it's all about them. they don't have the vision or depth to understand that they hurt alot of people, most of all you.
    Yes this is so true. My future brother in laws ex is like this. She had it made in the shade, she never had to lift a finger, he worked, came home, cleaned the house, made dinner, all those shamrocks and shenanigans. She still managed to bollocks it up by cheating on him with an inmate on a day pass!! Yeah, he left that night (my FBIL came home and essentially walked in on it). So now hes happily moved on and remarried and he had both of his daughters living with him, (they wanted to be with him) and shes lonely. She never misses a chance to make stabs at him when she talks to his new wife and she happens to know what shes up to so she shakes her head and agrees to get her off the phone. She vainly attempts to make him miserable like she is and it must drive her nuts that he has moved on while she is no better than she was when he left!! When my father cheated on my mother and my ex cheated on me, they both gave the same frail excuses. Be thankful that you cant reason with a cheater, that means your chances of being one are greatly lessened!!

  8. #17
    Member Sheeps's Avatar
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    it could be said that its better to have loved and lost than never had to love at all... i think many men (and women?) would regret if discovered - if noone gets hurt do they still regret it??? I doubt it.

  9. #18
    Gold Member cantexplain's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Sheeps
    it could be said that its better to have loved and lost than never had to love at all... i think many men (and women?) would regret if discovered - if noone gets hurt do they still regret it??? I doubt it.

    only those who don't feel uncomfortable keeping the reality of infidelity from their committed partner - and don't have the depth of spirit and character to feel the loss of true intimacy - so yes, for those it is fine if they don't "get caught".

    But what about the other?

  10. #19
    Silver Member macgyver4ever's Avatar
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    I would never, ever cheat on anyone. Even before being cheated on, I know in my heart that I could never do that to someone. I have no respect for it.

    My ex cheated on me, then had an affair, then cheated on me while we were in therapy trying to work things out. She lost all respect for me, and I did nothing wrong to her. Never harmed her, never hurt her, only loved her.

    It's sad to see such a sweet girl leave my life, but she had a pattern of cheating, but would never own up to it. She cheated on her first bf, and then the next one, and then then next one (me). I'm sure her new flame will have it coming soon enough. When she ended it with me this week, she seemed to have no feelings of guilt, remorse, or pain. My sobbing on her shoulder as I hugged her goodbye did nothing to a girl that had loved me for 4 years. All I can do now is not talk to her.

    I know the reason she went away was from the guilt of cheating on me the first time, but I had forgiven her. It was easier to walk away that to try to forgive herself.

  11. #20
    Gold Member cantexplain's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by macgyver4ever
    My ex cheated on me, then had an affair, then cheated on me while we were in therapy trying to work things out. She lost all respect for me, and I did nothing wrong to her. Never harmed her, never hurt her, only loved her.

    It's sad to see such a sweet girl leave my life, but she had a pattern of cheating, but would never own up to it.
    I am sorry you experienced this.

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