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Thread: how to tell if someone you work with likes you

  1. #1
    monica p.
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    Question how to tell if someone you work with likes you

    ...in a romantic way? can anyone tell me some signs? i'm not sure if this person is bi (know she likes guys), or interested in me - because i am not good at reading signals. However, I think there is something there. But maybe it's just me.

    Here's what i know about her: she's smart, beautiful, nice, hardworking... and i like her. Some subtle things that make me think she might go both ways, and possibly might be interested in me: she has made out w/ women at bars - not anything serious, just out of drunkeness (and no not w/ me , she gets a little nervous around me sometimes (i think), said once recently that she would kiss me on the lips if i were gay - she was excited about something (i blew it, and responded with something stupid), has asked about "the guy i was seeing" - and i haven't been seeing anyone (think it was merely her trying to either check my status on being single or gay , randomly will start to talk about her brazilians when we are alone (i know, this doesn't mean a thing - but in a larger context maybe?)

    i like her a lot and i don't know if she feels the same toward me. i haven't really led on that i would be interested - in a romantic way - in her yet, in the case that she might be interested in me. Besides just being chicken and not going out of my way to flirt with her, we also work together, so don't want to do anything until i have a better sense that she might be into me. What do you think? Think this is just going to be an unrequited crush? Damn. help? do you think there might be something there?

  2. #2
    PRSOV
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    If she's confident she'll flirt cautiously...

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    NKP
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    Ask her out for a drink or something, and flirt with her, see if she flirts back with you, touch her alot and look into her eyes alot.

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    monica p.
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    thanks

    PRSOV - thank you for your post... i think she's been flirting cautiously - but what does that indicate she's confident in?

    And lost&broken - thank you, too. we've gone out, but it's normal where we work to go out and get drinks - doesn't indicate anything significant like "interest" or a date. but i will try to go out again where it's just the two of us, and will try to do as you say... will keep you posted in the new year till then, i'm open for any advice at all.

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    coffeeformylover
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    if you are brave enough then say this when it's just the two of you: "hey where's that kiss that you owe me? ...you said you would kiss me if i was gay."

  6. #6
    monica p.
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    coffeeformylover - thank you for posting - that is actually a really good idea

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    mgirl
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    Look, i hate to burst your bubble, but it sounds like the same old, same old.

    A girl you like is curious about you. She is confused about her sexualty.

    She kisses members of the same sex when she is drunk (don't we all?).

    It doesn't necessarily mean she likes you, or that she is same-sex attracted, or serious about having a relationship with somebody of the same sex.

    Trust me. People at work are never who they seem to be.

    She may be curious, she may be bored. Either way, there is no evidence that she likes you, so don't get your heart carried away.

  8. #8
    monica p.
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    mgirl - thank you for your post. what you posted:

    "It doesn't necessarily mean she likes you, or that she is same-sex attracted, or serious about having a relationship with somebody of the same sex."

    is absolutey right... i think it's just me having a crush on someone i work with, and looking for signs, possibly.

    I'm still wondering though how you can tell if someone at work likes you.

  9. #9
    buddafleye
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    Ya, I'd definitely be careful about getting crushes on people and looking out for signs that aren't exactly obvious. I was positive, or at least semi-positive, this girl liked me. She made all the eye contact, caught her looking at me ALLLLL the time. All the time. She made an effort to sit closer to me. When she talked to me, she sat with her legs pointing at me, practically on MY legs.

    And BAM, she doesnt' like me. Now that I said something, I think she actually might hate me. hahah. I have no idea how to tell whether or not someone likes you, but like that person above said... don't get too wrapped up in it or you'll just get hurt. Reeaalllly hurt.

  10. #10
    Makedamnsure
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    Quote Originally Posted by buddafleye [Register to see the link]
    but like that person above said... don't get too wrapped up in it or you'll just get hurt. Reeaalllly hurt.
    Too bad I learned that the hard way, still learning actually -_-;;

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