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Thread: Why do relationships fail?

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    Member kb109's Avatar
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    Why do relationships fail?

    so i'm currently in my first serious relationship and i absolutely love being in love. i wouldn't change it for the world. so that brings me to my question.....what makes most relationships fail? i want to know this so i can avoid doing certain things and try to keep things going wonderful like they are right now. i could see myself being with this guy for a long time. i'm just curious about how your guys' relationship(s) failed. thanks!

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    Platinum Member Dako's Avatar
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    Love begins, love dies.

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    Platinum Member renaissancewoman101's Avatar
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    Sometimes relationships fail because people outgrow each other.

    Or because they didnt study each other long enough when dating to REALLY see that they were NOT compatible. Then as the relationship goes on, the glaring differences show up and people break up.

  4. #4
    ifit was an illusion.
    Last edited by rightfromthestart; 10-01-2006 at 05:07 AM.

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    long-term relationships often grow cold when one or both persons start taking the situation for granted and stop cultivating the garden of love. i've heard professionals warn about this on a number of occasions, and i have no doubt that it's something to actively avoid by doing whatever is necessary to keep things fresh and by acknowledging our appreciation for our partners on a regular basis.

    in my own experience, things ended like this:

    marriage #1: my serious and repeated infidelity (i was 17 and very immature)

    marriage #2: her serious and repeated infidelity (karma, i suppose)

    marriage #3: her serious and repeated infidelity (ok, what the HELL?)

    hmm... i guess serious and repeated infidelity might be something to watch out for as well.

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    Platinum Member Shadows Light's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by rightfromthestart
    if i could take back my last 4 years, i would do so in an instant. i will never see this person the way i once did, because it was an illusion. this person will never get another moment of my time, my thoughts, my empathy. some people are just evil. and that is how they love. never again. tonite i have removed any trace, burned and destroyed anything related and will never think of them again. so ends my stay on this site. as far as i am concerned this person is erased fully and completely and forever. there is nothing there - forever.
    KUDOS for you. I don't think thats possible. Every single person that comes into your life touches you and marks you in some way shape or form. For good or for bad. They leave a part of themselves with you... and you with them.

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    Platinum Member Dako's Avatar
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    Bently,

    Damn, that must be a painful past.
    Sorry you had such turmoil.
    Seriously.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Shadows Light's Avatar
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    In my case... I was WINDOW DRESSING for someone elses insecurities and issues. I was a skirt to hide behind... and he hated me for that in the end.

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    Mine is too complicated to write about.

    Two words that might help you though: couples counseling.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Shadows Light's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LostInMyThoughts
    Two words that might help you though: couples counseling.
    BTDT.. Got the t-shirt... 2X.

    Also went alone to counseling 5X...

    A sledge hammer upside the head would have sufficed. Mine. Tellling me to wake up.. and smell the coffee... lol...

    I'm being facetious... lol. I do think that couples counseling is a good idea. Sooner rather than later. Maybe if ground rules are put in place from the get go there it would prevent some of the growing pains in the relationship from being so painful.

    I know... why don't they make obtaining a "marriage liceance" more meaningful and make couples go to "Relationship Classes" with Dr. Phil.. and then they have to pass a rigorous exam. Upon completion of the exam... a contract is drawn up that both can live with... and there you go.

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