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What Goes on in a Guy's Brain?! Honestly.


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I broke up with my, now ex-boyfriend, about a week ago. Mainly because consistently he would get drunk at parties and hook up with a good number of girls, and it wouldn't just be making out. He knew I had problems with it, but he kept doing it. We went out for 9 months and we were happy, we were a good couple and had an honest and open relationship.

 

After the break up, I wanted to remain in no contact with him, to allow the sadness to fade, for the first couple days he would call me and leave messages of him crying and being completely miserable...the phone calls stopped after about 3 days. I was doing much much better.

 

Yesterday I find out (from one of my best friend's who is also pretty good friends with him) that he's been sleeping around with girls for the past few days. Like he would call them up and have sex with them and be completely open about it and tell everyone that he just got laid and all the details and crap. He was the kind of hookup guy before we started dating, but when we were in the relationship, he was so....into me...like head over heels crazy in love. And, he knew that I wanted to wait until marriage for sex, and he respected that and he always told me how he wanted to wait for the right girl etc.

 

And now...he's just sleeping with a different girl everynight...has he gotten over me that quick?! Did I mean nothing to him?! Maybe it's not my business to care because we are broken up, but it hurts...so much. What's going on in his brain?

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This is close to one of the weirdest posts I have seen (if I understand it right). You broke up with him after 9 months because he was getting drunk and making out with other girls (more than making out). Now that you are broken up, you wonder why he is sleeping with other girls. Like now is the time he should get faithful?

 

I'll tell you something about human beings. You allow them to get away with certain behaviours and they will keep stepping those behaviours up. You allow them to walk all over you for 9 months and that becomes a hard habit to break.

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This guy has consistently been with other girls both during your relationship, as well as after. At least after you guys had broken up he was no longer "cheating" on you but something tells me he was, and forever will be, a bastard. Ouch!! I'm sorry, what a putz this guy is! At the very least he is no longer your putz or problem for that matter, to deal with.

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I think maybe you were hoping or thought he would stop to prove how much he loved and wanted you back. Especially with the crying messages and such. That this should have been an eye opener for him.

 

The main thing I'm thinking is: He has disrespected you so much. Even with a jolt of losing you, he probably refuses to realize that what he does is disrespectful to you.

 

Secondly - to answer your question - "Has he gotten over me this quick?" I doubt he has. Some people just have a callous way of going on with life. He's probably trying to make you jealous so you will go back to him.

 

I'm sure it hurts terribly. I'm sorry that you are going through this. Chin up - You deserve MUCH BETTER!

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welcome to enotalone

 

yeah, I am perplexed by your post also!

 

if he was fooling around with other girls most of the time you were dating, why did you think he would stop now that you broke up???

 

he was so....into me...like head over heels crazy in love.

 

yes, he was so into you that he felt the need to hook up with other women.

 

and how does all of this add up to a relationship that was good and honest?

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What's going on in his brain?

The real question is...what is going on in your brain?

 

First you say

we were happy, we were a good couple and had an honest and open relationship

 

Then

he would get drunk at parties and hook up with a good number of girls, and it wouldn't just be making out. He knew I had problems with it, but he kept doing it.

 

And you say

but when we were in the relationship, he was so....into me...like head over heels crazy in love.

 

Then again,

he would call them up and have sex with them and be completely open about it and tell everyone that he just got laid and all the details and crap

 

Can't you see that he was never into you at all! Reread your own post, it's that obvious!

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