Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 3 of 15 FirstFirst 123456 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 144

Thread: indi's journey

  1. #21

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,449
    Gender
    Male

    Shisms

    Wisdom may be to keep positives of all information and knowledge at hand and to be sure to discard negatives as well as to be conservative and proactive enough to not to get caught (up) by adversity.

    Now you are really developing a feel for the whole situation, considering more and more factors. I am proud of you. And you will make a great psychiatrist one day.

    I edit this post in an hour or so, my gf wants to talk to me.

    Back, sorry it took longer, we discussed all 6 kids, life's input from here..., tomorrow I will start another journal along the lines of "Kids can be life++" to keep track of all of them.

    OK, lets really get going.

    Originally Posted by lilac_indi
    well i got more studying done i think. ive been thinking a lot today. i look at my mum and i cant help but wonder.
    Great you got some work done. yes you do not want to copy her...
    ive been thinking a lot about my life and the way in which i have been brought up. this whole honour thing and the "what will other people think" rubbish. it just feel like i have a noose around my neck. as you get older you get more freedom - for me its the total opposite.
    You have realized the biggest weakness of old cultures and religions - single-minded dictatorial control - which results in destruction of (all) faith in these. Please keep this in mind as you otherwise likely will feel that I contradict myself at times.
    it always seems for me like the grass is greener on the other side. i think that other people have it soo much easier than i do. sometimes i envy my friends. they can go out, they can do pretty much anything which i have been deprived of because i am a girl and i need to stay in line or "no one will marry me".
    IMHO, your feelings are the result of a lack of choice. Your situation sounds adverse but getting "used" age 15 is not much use either.
    i get told to stop acting white and i get told to look in the mirror cause my skin is brown - this is the way i will always remain. i sometimes get called a coconut (brown on the outside, white on the inside).
    You are a coconut++ because you also retain positives of the (old) Indian culture.
    i just fear that i am going to mess up. let them down again like i have with my ex. i couldnt help what i had felt back then - i am a human being not a robot that i can just switch off my feelings when i like a guy.
    Here you can see a (self-destructive) shism within you. You can't "please them" and "have freedom of choice" at the same time.
    i picture myself as a mother in the future - how i am going to bring up my children in this type of environment. i have learnt a lot from my mother but not in the way that you think. i have learnt to NOT be like her. i know she wants whats best for me but sometimes i resent her for the way that she has brought me up because of culture.
    This is the toughest question of your post: Do you want one day that your daughter feels like you or is treated like your cousin?
    my children when i have them in the future, i want them to be able to live a life their way. i dont want them to be tied down like i have. regrets is a big thing and i have a lot of them - due to my mum. i want my children to live life through their eyes not mine. to be able to enjoy life to the full - i want them to have what i never got the luxury of having. as for boyfriends and girlfriends - their freedom.
    [/QUOTE]I fully concur, and treat my children (including the virtual you and quite a few more) the same way.
    i am not racist. i love different cultures and i love learning about them. i would love it if we all could get along peacefully. that is how i want my chldren to be brought up. if my child was to fall in love with someone from a different religion or skin colour i wouldnt mind at all. as long as i see that my child is happy thats all that matters. if someone like my mum would object i would happily challenge them. i dont see the big deal at all.
    You now speak as I felt for a long time about you. This world needs people feeling like you to speak up and stand for their beliefs. And I do concur of course. And I am all for keeping positives like strong family values of old cultures.
    its a shame really. my parents never gave me and my ex a chance. they were shocked to discover i was dating but the fact that he was white was insult to injury. i cant help but wonder how things might have been if that wasnt an issue...
    Your parents may well belong into the old country, into a cutoff village in the Himalayas. Please do not blame them, they do not know better and if you look for faults, it is another lot of shisms, sorry. The same country (UK) which evolved you, gave them freedom to relocate without considering all issues we talk about. By having relocated to Hong Kong, am I to a significant extent a product of the UK too.

    Please be patient, do not worry, you will find your path.
    Last edited by nottoogreen; 08-17-2006 at 05:58 AM.

  2. #22
    Member lilac_indi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    a place with no name
    Age
    34
    Posts
    396
    Gender
    Female
    had another attack yesterday. hadnt had one since friday. my chest started hurting and i really had to focus on my breathing til the pain went away. i keep wondering what the hell it could be.

    woke up from another dream of the ex *man that is getting really tedious*
    going to get some last minute cramming of stockholm syndrome and stalking before the big day - man i hope they dont come up in the same section. there are 2 sections in the exam paper. have to do an essay from each. if stockholm and stalking are in the same section i am pretty much screwed.

    im listening to one of my favourite songs at the moment by green day:

    I walk a lonely road
    the only one that i have ever known
    dont know where it goes
    but its home to me and i walk alone
    i walk this empty street
    on the boulevard of broken dreams
    where the city sleeps
    and im the only one and i walk alone

    my shadow's the only one that walks beside me
    my shallow heart's the only thing thats beating
    sometimes i wish someone out there will find me
    til then i walk alone

    im walking down the line
    that divides me somewhere in my mind
    on the border line of the edge
    and where i walk alone
    read between the lines of what's
    f***** up and everything's alright
    check my vital signs i know im still alive
    and i walk alone

    my shadow's the only one that walks beside me
    my shallow heart's the only thing thats beating
    sometimes i wish someone out there will find me
    til then i walk alone

    that pretty much sums up how i feel most days. more so recently. that song has been a huge comfort to me in the past couple of weeks.

  3. #23

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,449
    Gender
    Male
    Have a look at this: link removed. I often had this in the 90's due to my lifestyle at the time. You get it checked out on Monday? Do you exercise?

    Sad lyrics, I wish you that you will be in the mood for dance music soon, at least half of the time.

    Knowledge of the stockholm syndrome will come handy on this site. I trust that all went well.
    Last edited by nottoogreen; 08-17-2006 at 08:47 AM.

  4. #24
    Member lilac_indi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    a place with no name
    Age
    34
    Posts
    396
    Gender
    Female
    hey NTG i havent had the exam yet. got it tomorrow

    i will read that site later on. yes i am getting it checked on monday. i dont want anyone else in my family to know at the moment so this jab for india will be a good excuse to hide it from them and ask the doctor straight out.

    me and dance music dont go together NTG lol but thanks for the giggle. just cannot wait until tomorrow is over. then i will prepare for my trip to india. a holiday which has been long overdue.

  5.  

  6. #25

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,449
    Gender
    Male
    Have you read the loser article?, there is also a link to Stockholm syndrome on the site. The site is linked in Wicked.

    I wish you well for tomorrow, may the force be with you.

    When will you go to India and for how long?

  7. #26
    Member lilac_indi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    a place with no name
    Age
    34
    Posts
    396
    Gender
    Female
    thanks NTG i will check that out.

    i am going to india in october and i am going away for 2 weeks. finally i will get to see my roots *yay*

    thank you for your kind words of encouragement - i will need all the luck in the world for tomorrow. i will let you all know how i get on.

  8. #27

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,449
    Gender
    Male
    Here it is removed[/i]. I am reading up on it too.

    Wow, It's you first trip to India you will be amazed about your roots.

    I think of you tomorrow.

  9. #28

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,449
    Gender
    Male
    As to Stockhomlm syndrome, follow this thread and read backward.




  10. #29
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    642
    Gender
    Female
    Hey Indi....

    I just looked into my crystal ball and it told me that you passed all your exams...

    Just thought you might like to know....

  11. #30
    Member lilac_indi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    a place with no name
    Age
    34
    Posts
    396
    Gender
    Female
    thanking you mystic meg

Page 3 of 15 FirstFirst 123456 ... LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •