"down" and out

The last three times my girlfriend and I had sex, we went about 20 minutes each time without me cumming; in fact, I lost my erection everytime. It has nothing to do with her because it feels great. We have had sex plenty before this, and I have never had this problem. If I am out of her for barely a couple seconds I begin to lose the erection. Sadly, the last time (just tonight) I could actually feel me losing my erection while still inside of her. It sort of felt like I was getting to climax, but I didn't and lost my erection. Kind of like a climax without the climax if you understand. I have some ideas of what could be wrong. First, I have a broken elbow so it is difficult to get in a position I like for too long without hurting that arm so sometimes instead of thikning about sex, I think about the pain in my arm. Except with that, we had sex several times before this problem happened while my elbow was broke, and I still came. Second, a few weeks ago we were having sex and the condom broke. So now when we are having sex, I get nervous that it will happen again. I am constantly checking to make sure it is still fine even though I know it is. She said she was going to call to make an appt to get birth control, but she has yet to do it. I do not want to pressure her into doing it either, but it would make me so much more comfortable while having sex. However, like with the first possibility, we did have sex several times after the breaking incident with me still cumming. The third possibility is that maybe our foreplay is lasting too long and I run out of energy. I do not think that is very plausible as our foreplay is always typically long; though the last copule times it has been a little bit longer I think. Does anyone have any idea what could be wrong?!?! I am hoping it is just something that will go away shortly, and that it's nothing major.

well, if you are not aged and not taking certain drugs, then it is probably mental, and could even be a combination of your first two possibilities. it will likely go away when your elbow is healed and she's on birth control, so i wouldn't sweat it for now.

Nerves and elbow. Once that's healed and once you can have sex without worrying about pregnancy, you'll be fine.

First, I have a broken elbow so it is difficult to get in a position I like for too long without hurting that arm so sometimes instead of thikning about sex, I think about the pain in my arm. Except with that, we had sex several times before this problem happened while my elbow was broke, and I still came. Second, a few weeks ago we were having sex and the condom broke. So now when we are having sex, I get nervous that it will happen again

The reasons you described are definitely things that can cause you to lose focus and as a result, lose an erection during sex. My guess is that the nervousness about the condom is probably having the greatest effect on you.

You might want to kindly ask her if she has called her doctor and if she's still thinking about going on birth control. That's not pressure- that's just you being informed about what's going on. Clearly an unwanted pregnancy is something that you know you are not ready for, so you have a right to at least ask what her plans are in regards to using a back-up method of birth control other than condoms.

BellaDonna

In a way, you answered your own question - you are worrying.

I experience similar problems when I am not relaxed and think something. When I think about "not thinking" or worry about loosing the errection, it's over.

The solution is to be pain free, comfortable, and relaxed.