Ask For Advice
Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: Is it possible to fall in love with someone through letters?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2006

    Is it possible to fall in love with someone through letters?

    I don't mean a crush or anything; I mean real being in love. Do you think it's possible, or do you believe you need to actually physically be with them to love them? (By physically I don't mean sex or anything, I mean just being around them.) I'm curious.

  2. #2
    Lady Bugg
    Gold Member Lady Bugg's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    I think it is possible to have feelings for someone...but to 'love" someone is a much deeper thing. Writing someone is just words. Who can't write pretty, nice words, and say things you want to hear? Loving someone is not just about reading's about living with them through the good, the bad and the ugly. It's easy to be soemone you are not on my personal bias is that No, you cannot TRULY "love" soemone through letters. You can love how they make you feel, or what they say..but not them.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    I agree with LadyBugg. Personally I don't think it is possible to truly be in love with somone through just correspondence or in fact just chatting over the internet. Really you cannot be in love with someone until you "know" them and the physical being is such a big part of that whether we like it or not. We express so much of ourselves (emotionally) through our body language that it is just to big a part of the equation to take out of the whole "in love" feeling.

  4. #4
    Member bobo85's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    No its not possible. But it is possible to fall in love with the fantasy of being in love.

  5. #5
    Member anonymous_presence's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    There's far too much room for error when it comes to letter relationships. Writing can be a very personal and revealing thing for someone, yet you can't truly know what a person is like. There's problem, as Ladybugg said, with the writer, who can manipulate what s/he writes and make him/her appear to be someone else altogether. But there's also a problem with the reader, who can interpret the words in many different ways. It's so uncertain that there's too much room for idealization and projection for there to be anything real. But then again, you also see this in face-to-face scenarios.

  6. #6
    Platinum Member Crazyaboutdogs's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Thumbs up Love through letters---definitely yes

    Yes, I think it is definitely possible to fall in love through letters. That is how I fell in love. I did meet him a few times and we talked on the phone, but most of our communication was via email since we were long distance. If two people are very grounded and the letters have substance (not mushy gushy love letters), you can learn a lot about a person. You get to know their mind rather than focusing on their physical presense. People get too caught up having to be with their significant other constantly that it becomes an obsession..."when am I going to see him/her next". Love takes time to grow and it is the "I love you" declarations within a few weeks of knowing someone that leads more people down the wrong path. Love via letters takes time, but it can have much more substance than "love at first sight" or those declarations of love within a month of knowing someone. Love via letters allows you to process information about the person without the distractions and desperation to be with the person.


Top Threads
Am I being emotionally abused?
Hi I'm new on these forums, and need advice with a long distance, serious relationship. I met this girl on an online dating thing, and since then we
What to do...?
Hello, everyone. We are in a long distance marriage actually. Been married for 3 years but long distance. I am Japanese and he is an American. He
Is my girlfriend cheating on me ?
My girlfriend moved to Australia 3 months ago and we had a great relationship before she moved, she is living there for 1 year and we were both
Moving from ldr to ldf
What are some opinions on going from a long distance relationship to a long distance friendship?
Let him go or don't give up
So my boyfriend of almost a year broke up about 5 days ago. We are in a long distance relationship and I know things are difficult and we each have
Something seems off...
So I've been dating this amazing man for 2 months now. I'm 21 and studying to be a teacher and he's 29 and a father of the sweetest 2 year old boy
Featured Threads
Is there any hope for my relationship?
Hello, I hope somebody can offer some advice please. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 and half years and he's never told me that he loves me. I
is it normal for women to ask married men to buy them underwear?
Hey, new to this and kinda don't know how it works but here goes.... I'm married my husband works offshore, which means he spends a fortnight at
Love spells to bring back an ex?
My relationship with my ex was perfect. I fell in love for the first time in my life and I loved him with everything I had. We went through harsh
This is probably going to sound stupid but I don't know what to do
Hi everyone, I'm new on here so I apologise if I miss anything or get something wrong. I was told this was a friendly but honest place to ask advice
Found my girlfriend reaching out to another guy after an argument
Not one to post here, but need an outsiders perspective please. Had a drunk argument with my girlfriend late Friday night. I left her apartment to
It happened!! Ex wants to get back together
Hello ENA people, I've been in NC for months. So my ex calls me out of the blue because he wants to get back together. He heard from a friend
She called my brain 'unique' and its working 'laughable'- call off?
So we've been dating for seven months. We're 21 and 20, and in love. We haven't ever had anything to fight about really, we were just having this
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts