Can men and women just be friends?

RC, it is a great picture.

I agree! It's a great photo

Miya xx

I am getting over my ex and hope to be great friends, when the time is right. You have to appreciate good people and be their friends when it is not too hard. She has a new guy and I am happy for her. You have to let go and I am having my own fun now and totally respect my ex. I wrote her an e-mail after four months of NC and she replied very thoughtfully and appropriately. I will keep in touch, but not for a few months. I don't want to lose her friendship, but am still getting used to not being her man. If she was not sweet, then I would have just never talked to her again, but she is a good person and I care about her. I guess you have to get to the point where you can appreciate the person and leave the feelings behind. I am doing pretty good and just have to respect a good person and friend. It is hard, but you have to appreciate someone that was good to you. I could have chosen to never talk to her again, but I choose to talk to her every once in a while. It is hard to find good people and I can't let that go. But, I will not talk to her for a long time. I think it was healing to say hello. I knew she would be nice and she was. It is defitiely possible to be friends with an ex once time has gone by. My time is not there yet, but I respect her and consider her a best friend. I am guessing that I will be friends with her once she is married. Time will tell.

men and women CAN be friends. it's boys and girls who find it the most difficult.

men and women CAN be friends. it's boys and girls who find it the most difficult.

I think you're right. It is a matter of maturity. Adults are expected to have self control and pose, but the fact is that you have to realize that not every person you fall in love will love you back. Its sad for those that are unrequited, but we each have the right to chose and should not be pressured via perceived platonic relationships.

I think you're right. It is a matter of maturity. Adults are expected to have self control and pose, but the fact is that you have to realize that not every person you fall in love will love you back. Its sad for those that are unrequited, but we each have the right to chose and should not be pressured via perceived platonic relationships.

SO TRUE!!!

I guess it also depends on other factors like how close they are. I can say my two best friends (other than my g/f) are both female. One I have know for about 14 years or so. We hooked up at one point in the very beginning and just stopped. Just kissing and stuff as I didn't want to try more. After that it was never an issue at all. The other one I have been close to for about 8 years. We have never done anything or come close to it.

In general, definitely. Half of my closest friends are women, all of them attractive. I met all of them at my places of work and kept contact afterwards, some going back to 13 years. But I consider them like sisters and they see me the same way (as a brother of course.) Not everything in life has to be about sex. In fact, one of my friends has a nice rack. Sometimes she'll wear a tanktop and it feels like there are four people in the room instead of us two. I'll even say, "Hey Susan, your left boobie is about to pop out, you might want to tuck that in before it reaches out and grabs someone." Se'll laugh and adjust. It's playful, no harm no foul and we both know the limits.

Now, if I was attracted to her sexually, I wouldn't even mention that. I'd be too embarrassed. I may even have the urge to tuck the breast back in myself, ever so gently. That's when friendships become tricky and when the line that is usually crossed harmlessly because an uncomfortable line.

Dude maybe shes giving you a hint and would love a hand! I say next time offer her assistance. Maybe say Susan I have noticed you have been struggling with an issue, do you mind if I help? I am sure she will oblige.

Maybe it's just me but i don't believe that men and women (girls or boys) can be "good" friends...speaking from past experiences ofcourse...my friend was really good friends with this guy from work and tada! their lovers now ...and i had a best friend who was a guy in highschool, we always hung out and stuff and then realized we really liked each other so we started dating, fell in love, and eventually broke up and our friendship fell apart...see what i mean? if you become gooood friends with a guy, you end up dating them ...that's why it's best (for me) to have (more) friends of the same sex ...lol anyone agree?

Eeeehh?? Say what?

Man, you could have a female proclaiming you eternal love and you wouldn't notice!

Well, at least it looks to me that either she finds you attractive, or she thinks you are not interested in females.

But well, I have too little info about the situation to even try to come up with a mental picture of it.

Maybe it's just me but i don't believe that men and women (girls or boys) can be "good" friends...speaking from past experiences ofcourse...my friend was really good friends with this guy from work and tada! their lovers now ...and i had a best friend who was a guy in highschool, we always hung out and stuff and then realized we really liked each other so we started dating, fell in love, and eventually broke up and our friendship fell apart...see what i mean? if you become gooood friends with a guy, you end up dating them ...that's why it's best (for me) to have (more) friends of the same sex ...lol anyone agree?

for the most part i do agree with you. or they don't necessarily become 'lovers' but one or both, usually has feelings for the other. it kind of just has to happen naturally. i had a close guy friend for years where neither of us were interested at all. but i do think it was a rarity.

Hey Toddy boy, check your PM.

Dude maybe shes giving you a hint and would love a hand! I say next time offer her assistance. Maybe say Susan I have noticed you have been struggling with an issue, do you mind if I help? I am sure she will oblige.

 

Eeeehh?? Say what?

 

Man, you could have a female proclaiming you eternal love and you wouldn't notice!

 

Well, at least it looks to me that either she finds you attractive, or she thinks you are not interested in females.

 

But well, I have too little info about the situation to even try to come up with a mental picture of it.

 

lol, I did wonder about that, but she's one of the guys... and engaged to her boyfriend of 5 or 6 years.

lol, I did wonder about that, but she's one of the guys... and engaged to her boyfriend of 5 or 6 years.

hmmmm 5-6 years is way too long!

Looks like Toddy has put me on his ignore list.

hmmmm 5-6 years is way too long!

Really? I may need to start a thread on that. My Ultimate Crush was going out with her boyfriend for 13 years before they finally got married. Hmm, did I have a shot 10 years ago, or was the thought of her moving from a tall, dark and handsome successful stockbroker to data entry clerk with no career path somewhat unappealing.

Really? I may need to start a thread on that. My Ultimate Crush was going out with her boyfriend for 13 years before they finally got married. Hmm, did I have a shot 10 years ago, or was the thought of her moving from a tall, dark and handsome successful stockbroker to data entry clerk with no career path somewhat unappealing.

So now you know you have to change careers!