Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14

Thread: why do guys get close than pull away?

  1. #1
    SeaBisquit
    Member SeaBisquit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Age
    36
    Posts
    1,134

    why do guys get close than pull away?

    at times it seems like we are getting really close than all of a sudden he will pull away. why does he do this? sometimes i think it doesn't have anything to do with me tho because he says i'm the only one that he talks to. so i'm guessing something else is wrong?

  2. #2
    lost_status
    Member lost_status's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    In his mind and in his thoughts
    Posts
    322
    Gender
    Female
    From my expirence, guys who do that arnt sure what they want. They might be insecure if the relationship. They will get close one minute and then they think its too much, or they arent ready, or they might think they dont want to get attached, so they pull away.

    Guys arnt the only ones who do it, girls do it too

  3. #3
    hk87
    Bronze Member hk87's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Age
    30
    Posts
    461
    Gender
    Female
    I know, it's SO annoying! My friend does it, but I think it's because he has a girlfriend and thinks he shouldn't be talking or getting involved with me!

    Hk87

  4. #4
    SeaBisquit
    Member SeaBisquit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Age
    36
    Posts
    1,134
    sometimes i think he is afraid of getting hurt because he says things like girls always end up hating me.

  5. #5
    lost_status
    Member lost_status's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    In his mind and in his thoughts
    Posts
    322
    Gender
    Female
    Hk87, are you seriious! are you good friends with him? It shouldnt matter if he has a gf, argghh how annoying! LOL

  6. #6
    shorty20
    Bronze Member shorty20's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Nebraska
    Age
    33
    Posts
    1,055
    Gender
    Female
    I'm reading a book called "mars and venus on a date" in it, it describes 5 stages to a relationship, and the second is a stage of uncertainty. He's not exactly sure what he wants, but don't take it personally. I would use this time to take time for yourself as well. Don't pester him about why he's backing off or not calling as much. Stay cool, hang out with the girls, and when he calls, just be pleasant and enthusiastic. Act warm and happy that he called, not resentfull that he's been pulling away. He'll come around and realize what a catch you are.

  7. #7
    kellbell
    Platinum Member kellbell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Colorado
    Age
    41
    Posts
    4,229
    Gender
    Female
    Hey SeaB!

    From my experience guys tend to pull back simply because they need time for themselves and not to "lose" themselves in the relationship. It's nothing personal to you, it's just they way they are. In my experience, guys tend to have an easier time looking out for their own needs whereas women tend put others needs first. Not saying that is the case all the time, it is just that it has happened to me more times than not.

    What I would suggest is to pull back a little yourself and do other things like hang out with your girlfriends, your hobbies, and such. It's important to live your own life while being in the relationship and not lose whom you are. Just try to relax and give each some space. I am sure once you do that, things will be much better for you. Take care and good luck with everything.

  8. #8
    chai714
    Platinum Member chai714's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    The End of the Pier
    Age
    39
    Posts
    2,851
    Gender
    Male
    When you have sex with a man who has no emotional attachment to you, he'll no longer be interested. The sooner you give it up, the less likely he is to stick around.

    If this isn't the case with you, then I think that he simply lost interest at some point.

  9. #9
    shiminimo
    Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    361
    i don't think it's you. i think it's something else that's bugging him. to be honest most guys won't show there feelings or let out what's really bugging him.

  10. #10
    hk87
    Bronze Member hk87's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Age
    30
    Posts
    461
    Gender
    Female
    Lost status- I'm being totally serious! It's crazy isn't it? I'll hang out with him for a few days, then not hear from him for like a week! He just goes all weird on me and doesn't talk much, where as other days he can't say enough to me! We are good friends, and I love spending time with him (because I like him ;-) ) but he doesn't know that as I don't show it, but he does pull away from me, it's like he suddenly gets a conscience- he maybe likes me, but then feels bad for thinking that and goes away to try and get over it, but then comes back! His g/f and him are very long distance though....

    Hk87

  11.  

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Ask For Advice

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •