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I have been married for alittle over a year now. My husband has "cheated" on me by having phone sex with a "friend", lied about all kinds of things, let his parents treat me like dirt, and made me feel like nothing. The worst problem..actually it has been the problem that just won't go away. When I met him we had a wonderful time dating...that was for about 2 weeks. Then I met his mother. She made life HELL! She was abusive to him, and called the police when he would leave to see me (he lived with them at the time) We did nothing to provoke this behavior at all. I thought she was just nuts and felt pretty sorry that he had a mom like that. After seeing all of this my own mom told me to offer him a safe place to live. So he did move in with us. We became engaged not too long afterwards and started planning a wedding. We tried to make his parents feel included in all the plans so that his mom could get over any issues she might have. I tried my very best to be as kind as I could...she just made it pretty much impossible. They didn't want to help pay for any part of the wedding unless she could pick stuff out. This didn't go well with my family. The whole thing was becoming very stressing and I just didn't want it anymore. We pushed back any plans of getting married till things got better...well that never happened. We eventually moved into our own place. We decided to go ahead and go get married at the courthouse..partly because he was able to get insurance and I needed that badly, we had no money for a wedding (I have a single mom and she really couldn't handle all the costs of a wedding)... So after two years his parents still treat me badly...his dad has yelled at me and his mom still doesn't think she has done anything wrong. I am bitter that I never had a wedding. They just seem to feel that we need to get over it. My husband pretty much has no back bone...he just sits there while his parents yell at me..even in our own home. That hurts the worst! I feel he should have stood up for me. He says it won't happen again...but I have heard it all before. I am not sure I can move past everything that has gone on...not sure I really should. I don't feel a bond with him anymore...more like a me vs. him and his family. All of that plus the things he has done...I just don't know what to do!

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I am not the type of person that would say end it quickly when you are married, however, in this case when you take on your partner you take on the inlaws (outlaws in this case) you should have seen the interference before you got married, I know love is blind, however, it is forever, could you really put up with the mother inlaw forever - I think not!

 

If he hasn't stood up for now after what you and your family have done for him her never will. Marriage is about love and respect, he has not respected you out of fear for his mother.

 

I say go. Run as fast a you can. The mother has issues and will never improve nased on her age.

 

Good luck.

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Well tonight I made my mind up. I want a divorce. Too much stuff has happened..too many lies and false promises! I think this will make me a stronger and happier person. Thanks for the advice...but in my heart I knew what was best to do already. Just takes alittle courage...

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If it was just his family, I would say to move away and have as little contact with them as possible. But he has also done other things to hurt you, the phone sex with a friend. He shows no desire to make things better and help you. You deserve better then that. Good for you for getting a divorce. Hope you meet someone better in the future.

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